Mrs Bean who has been very quiet for weeks has finally struck again. She pushed the lift button 2 or 3 times as it did not respond immediately to her command . The result was the lift doors shut and the lift moved a few feet then but then did not budge. 1 hour later the emergency lift engineer crow barred the door and released us between floors. We climbed out unscathed. I suppose there has got to be a first time for everything but after the bed bugs last night ...

Had a traumatic night at Terry Thomas' pension as Sally was convinced there were bed bugs which is the fear of all fellow pilgrims. She had no insect spray so decided to cover the bed with hair spray. Her theory was that the bugs would stick to the mattress. Obviously it would have no effect on the bugs but at least there coiffure would be perfect while they were biting us to death. As it happened we were not bitten but Sally was on sentry duty all night so she ...