Im sorry, I know Im in a foreign country and need to adapt to (MANY) cultural differences, but I dont think it should be acceptable anywhere to be uninvitedly obnoxious, nosy and interruptive. I feel like there are social manners that should be global, or at least gestures and body language that are universal so that no matter where you are, the person gets the message: you're crazy and I rather poke my eyeball than talk to you right now.

It's one thing for the (beautiful yet) obnoxious parrots to squak horrendously outside the window at 5am. I thought birds were supposed to sing sweet songs... But I swear, people here seem to have no limits when getting in your business. Sometimes, Im caught off guard that I dont even know how to bulls*** my way out of answering.

It started with my bosses, who have no shame showing their blood-thirsty shark sides. They're always asking me about my other jobs like "How much do they pay you there?" "Did they train you?" "What book do they use? Can I see it?" Or when I say that Im unavailable they jump down my throat "Why? What do you have? Does it pay more than we do?" I know that English schools are in competition, it's a business, I respect it but cant you do research differently? No! Im not busy, I just dont want to waste 3 hours in transportation for a 1-hour class when I have one month left in Rio and want to go to the beach. Hows that for honesty?

Then there are employees that obviously are bored with their monotonous lives that being face to face with an outsider is like landing on the moon. Once me and Ricardo stopped at the grocery store to grab a few things and the cashier heard me speaking English to him. She asked where I was from, understandable. I can handle that. But then she started asking questions like "Is she your girlfriend?" "Do you live together?" "Where do you live?" "Does she speak Portuguese?" First of all, SHE is right in front of you, you can ask HER. Second of all, who are you again??? Would you like my horoscope sign, perhaps my passport number? I believe there are limits... let's keep it to generally friendly yet not intrusive questions like "How about that weather?" or "Oh those apples look good!", ok? Thanks. The best part was that Ricardo thought it perfectly normal.

I believe the worst of all was the stranger who approached me and Ricardo at the bookstore today (inspiring this blog). There we were, browsing along the inspirational quote books to self-help books to travel guides and this gentlemen hears us speak English (notice the pattern, English is my handicap, my barrier to being able to browse books in peace). So he takes it upon himself to ask where we are from (no one ever thinks Ricardo is Brazilian) and shoves his book that he wrote in our hand. Wait a second, I thought, is he trying to sell us his English/Portuguese book of stories about himself in a bookstore that doesnt sell this book? He was nice enough, but clearly cant take a clue... and I swear he went on for half an hour talking about the Engilsh language, his past as a journalist, his experience writing this book, and then he starts asking us how he can advertise his book or how he can try to sell it. Im sorry, do we look like professional publishers? Business managers? Marketing consultants? Because we were going for the "Cute-couple-that-simply-wants-to-enjoy-the-bookstore... ALONE" kind of look. Me, being ever-so blunt, eventually just inched my way farther and farther... I started picking up other books and skimming until I was free. Poor Ricardo put up with another 10 or 15 minutes, even exchanged email addresses. Ricardo is smart and all, but really, his advice of using Google or Amazon wasnt so genius that we need to stay in touch with this crazy man.

I will spare you the rest of my examples of people showing me body parts I prefer not to see and discussing less-than-pretty details while Im eating, but I think you all get the point. Dont get me wrong, I know that there are crazies everywhere but I get the feeling that it is a lot more acceptable here. Let's just add this to the "Why I'm ready to get out of here" list.