We wake up at around 7ish ready to be picked up at 8. The bus arrives on time, we go outside and are surprised to see... An actual bus. I thought it'd be similar to the salt flats but this tour was on a bus, full, must have been about 30 people on there. We get on and realise around half of the people must be over 50. Not really the tour I had in mind but there ya go. We travel about an hour and a half down the road out of town and arrive at a truck stop thing for a toilet break and a drink for 15 minutes. The old people get tea so this turns into half an hour. We all then jump into the bus and carry on up the road towards colca canyon. Every half hour or so the bus stops to pile everyone for picture opportunities whether it be a rock or some lhamas... By the end I don't even bother getting off as they start to be a bit pointless. Finally we arrive in Chivay, the small town near the canyon for lunch. It seems everyone has lunch included except us, however we came prepared, we made hotdogs! (Dyson funny food story #1) We dip off to the park to eat our lunch. With no cling film around our hotdogs we pull them out a soggy paper bag. (not a euphemism btw) Dyson takes a bite. "Errr, these taste of plastic... THESE ARE f***ING PLASTIC". I turn around and see Dyson pull a mushy sausage within a plastic casing out his mouth, naturally I absolutely piss myself. I'd not realised that each sausage was individually wrapped in plastic and cooked them still in. So so funny watching Dyson gagging on a frankfurter sausage. It then starts to rain as we're picking out the sausage meat. Not being able to afford a real lunch we settle for crisps and a chocolate bar. We then get taken to our hostel which is pretty nice and chill out for an hour. We then get picked up and taken to the hot springs which although aren't as authentic looking as the Bolivian ones are a lot deeper and more like a pool (it is basically a pool although they're heated off the volcano heat) We stay there for a an hour before heading back and are told we have 2 hours before dinner. Knowing we didn't have that included we again came prepared with 4 packs of noodles. (Dyson funny food story #2) We ask if they have a kitchen or even a kettle to which they say no so we head back to the room to have a think. Dyson goes to see if the hot tap gets hot enough. Not really paying attention i stay in the room playing with my phone. "The waters quite hot but I'm not sure if noodles might block the sink". I walk into the bathroom to see a sinkfull of mushy noodles and Dyson standing there with a handful. "They're defiantly getting softer". There's also no plug so he was relying on the bottom noodles plugging the sink up long enough for the luke warm water to cook the noodles and as if we're both meant to huddle round the sink eating hard noodles out of a hotel sink with our hands. Through my histerics I explain I'm not gonna eat the sink noodles. We have the last of our biscuits instead. We get picked up for the dinner and taken to the restaurant. We sit down for 5 minutes and just 'pop out for a fag'. We don't return, shamed by the fact we can't afford dinner. We then find an Irish bar and a burger and chips within our minuscule budget as well as a sprite from the shop. We then go back to the restaurant to watch the Peruvian band we were told about. We upped and left after 2 minutes, it was so lame. We go back and get an early night as we have to be up at 4.30 anyways. Following morning we wake on time and get a breakfast of bread and jam, I stock up on coffee. We then head off to the canyon (whilst obviously stopping every five minutes for anyone with a free bus pass) When we get to the canyon it's pretty amazing, its a deep ol canyon. We then walk along the top of the canyon and reach condor cross, a viewing platform where you can watch condors sawing through the sky. We saw a few flying and after about an hour we set off back to Chivay for lunch were me and Dyson had some more biscuits. We were shamed once more when the tour guide asked us where the hostel towels we borrowed were (we steal towels as often as possible due to our lack of laundry) Dyson instantly lies and says he doesn't know whilst they're soaking in our bags, such a stupid answer as we all stand there looking confused. Knowing she isn't going to back down quick thinking Dyson suggests we might have left them on the bus?? (but not remembered) We walk back to the bus and pretend to get it out the bus even thou the bus is locked. As we walked back the tour guide walks out...with the BUS DRIVER. They know we've lied, we know, we hand the towels back with our heads down. We jump back on the bus shortly after just wanting to get home. We get back about 4.30 and hang around till our 10 hour bus at 9.30 that evening. It was a funny couple of days but I felt abut duped as we had nothing included plus we did no trekking which we were expecting, no bother thou. The canyon was still pretty cool, now time for a 10 hour bus...