Woke up feeling decidedly unwell from the night before but before the bus left I decided to ring the Abel Tasman coach company to see if my fleece was in lost property, which miraculously it was! Our new bus driver Flea said I had enough time to go and fetch it from their office and so had a nice hungover run there and back…not what was called for. Did have a cracking Burger King for breakfast at the first stop though, despite having lost the power to eat and drink and pilling most of it all over myself. Next was to take some nutty photos at Lake for the

Kiwi Experience mass cards, and being ever the showman I decided to dress up as Santa and be flanked by two sexy reindeer as I jumped into the lake. Now I had been warned it would be cold but nothing prepared me for the heart-attack inducing shock and the suit when wet was so flipping heavy that it took me ages to get out, much to the amusement of the now full bus of new trippers who I'd only just met. After going through that it better make it onto the card!

It was clear Flea was a bit of a character and told us that the next stop Westport was the inbred capital of NZ and was regularly voted the worst stop on the Kiwi Experience and so we were still going…obviously. Before arriving though flea got us to know our fellow passengers through a ticket exchange game which was fun, especially as I managed to drip boysenberry ice cream on most people's shoulders (a great conversation starter). This game meant for the first time that we met two Irish girls Jenny and Karen who were very chatty and liked asking questions, much to mine and Chris's dismay as we both were looking for an easy ride. Ended up playing charades at the back of the bus, but they didn't seem to fancy my version of Lord of the Rings (ask me when you see me).

Upon arrival in Westport me, Chris and Sunny (a new addition to the bus) decided to go for an afternoon beer to see if the place was as weird as it sounded and looked. Well it didn't disappoint. We had been sat in the local for 10 mins before two smashed locals came and sat with us. Well the young guy's opening line was (the non-explicit version), "my sister's a lesbian but she recently broke up with her partner and wants some male appendage." Unfortunately she was a rough old thing. We chatted tosh with them for a couple of hours, completely bemused, got taken to see the guy's 'Turbo' out back of the pub (which turned out to be a rusty old push bike) but being in New Zealand's version of the League of Gentleman both me and Sunny thought there was a high likelihood we both could get murdered. And so before going out Chris was stood at the bar and I shouted to him, "If I don't come back tell my kids I love them" and exited, at which point he turned to the other people at the bar and said, "He hasn't got any kids" which raised a laugh at least.