14

Our bus to bangkok was shocking. It took 10 hours and was so uncomfortable. We tried to get a night bus as soon as we got there, but they had none left untill tomorrow, so we stayed a night in koa San road. The next day we went shopping and bought alot more stuff than we were meant to, and Ned even got a hair cut!! I seen a t-shirt that says "i love my girlfriend" on it. So i bought it thinking it would be funny to show Jane. When we got back to the room, i was looking at everything i bought, and when i looked at the t-shirt she gave me the wrong 1 and it said "i love my boyfriend" haha s*** funny!!

We got on the sleeper bus which took 18 hours by bus and 2 hours by boat to Koh Phangan. We started talking to a man sitting next to Ned who was the randomist person ever!!

He was born in England,but lived in Nigeria all his childhood. He now lives in Koh Phangan. I asked him would he ever go back to Nigeria and he said no because police tried to take all of his money, so he drove off on a motorbike and was shot at by the police,and got shot in his ribs and passed out going 60 mph!!

Next he told us once he was that f***ed after a party, he had no clothes left after going in the sea, so he was driving home naked on his bike. People were trying to stop him (1. because he was naked, 2. because it disrespectful to the buddha apparently) eventually he pulled over and took an old mans clothes who was inside a room with a prostitute,and drove off haha. He said hes surprised his bike still works as he skidded off a road and fell into a river with his bike!!

I asked him if he was taking malaria tablets, and he said no because he already caught it in Africa, and was in a comer for 3 months!!

Next he said he was working on a boat as a temprorary chef and was bored 1 afternoon. He went snorkling round an island in New Zealand. As he was snorkling he said he had a feeling something was behind him, and as he ducked underneath, he saw a 2m shark skim past him, so he got out as quick as he could and had to pay someone to take him back to the boat,and never went back in the water again for 6months!!

Next he said its easy to get people killed on the island!! for an english to kill a thai its 400quid, thai to kill english its 200quid, and for a thai to kill a thai its 100quid haha he was a complete and utter nutter!!

We arrived and Alis mate who is working here at the moment said he would try and sort our accomodation out, but the island was completely full!! where he was staying, the owner said we can crash in a kitchen room for 1 night if we want. There where power tools everywhere, toasters etc haha and we had to use a motorbike side mirror for a shave haha eventually someone checked out so we got a room. We Were stayin in a beach hut which was actually on the sand and was like a private beach..it was probably the nicest beach i have ever seen.

The actual new years party was unreal. Supposedly between 20,000-40,000 people on the beach. Biggest party of the year. The beach was really long and it was completely rammed!! we handed our key in before we went out and i came back to our beach hut about 3.30 and it was pitch black and could not find where we handed our key in, so i had to sleep outside in our hammock with mosquitos everywhere and bats flying past my head!!

We were staying for the half moon party on the 4th jan,but on the 3rd we went out aswell. We went Haad Rin on the beach, where the new years party was, to see if anything was going on. Outside 1 bar there was a long rope that was bein swung by 2 men and people jump in and skip....but the rope was on fire. Ned runs straight in and starts skipping and as another lad ran to get in, he hit the rope and ned fell over on the rope and his leg went on fire!! a couple of people where trying to put him out, but he was on fire for about 8 seconds haha was s*** funny. He had plastic type material shorts, and they where melted to f***, and his leg was really badly burnt. He drowned his sorrows abit too much and was s*** faced, and being a nightmare shouting and singing as we where trying to get him back to the guest house. We got back eventually and went to sleep.

I woke up to a mad noise....and as i looked up, Neds standing there pissing against the wall, i was like what the f*** are you doing but he kept pissing and finished and just went back to sleep as if nothing had happened haha f***ing mad!! In the morning i told Ali to check his clothes because he pissed by his bag, and Ned had pissed on some of Alis clothes and had to get them washed haha....Ned can not remember anything still!!!

We went the half moon party and there was actually a half moon in the sky! dont no if thats just look or im completely stupid or what! it was basically in the middle of a forest,with a good few thousand people there! I went up to some fella who looked an absolute mess..he had a huge beard and looked like he didnt have long to live!! i said "can i have a photo with you please because you look like my dad?" haha he was made up!! i will put the photo up aswell!!it was a good night!

Me and Ned got scooters out on the day before we where all leaving,and drove around the whole island and was really good! The next morning i gave my scooter back to the hotel, they checked it, and gave me my passport back. As me and Ali where getting into our taxi to get the boat to Koh Samui, we seen Ned arguing with 1 of the men who worked there. Ned sent me a message on facebook the next day explaining what had happened!!!!

They were trying to charge him 120 quid for 2 tiny scratches,which is ridiculous. So he kept arguing telling them hes not paying for anything and he wants his passport back...but the man refused, keeping Neds passport in his bag around his neck. Eventually Ned flipped out and grabbed the man by the neck,took the bag, and started running down the road with his bags and jumped into a taxi. The people from the hotel started following in the car behind shouting "your in big trouble now" and "big mistake". We went to a bar a few nights before this happened called the amsterdam bar where we had "milkshakes" and Ned knew the owner. As he had knowhere else to go he got the taxi to go there. As he got there he ran up to the bar telling the taxi driver to wait, and spoke to the owner, who said as long as you have got your passport there is nothing they can do!! but they were shouting up to the bar saying "the police are on there way" Ned thought it was a bluff, but next thing the police turned up and arrested Ned, taking him to the police station, and put him in a cell. After half an hour or so, A police officer asked Ned to explain what had happened. He told them, and they put him back in the cell. 10 minutes later they got him out again and told him "dont worry, your not payin for anything, you welcome here anytime" They then gave him a lift to where his boat was leaving from which was arriving in 5 minutes and he said he got a few funny looks getting out of the back of a police car with his rucksack haha hes an absolute nutter and i was shocked they let him off as they are so corrupt. Lucky Irish b****** haha