I need to catch you all up on the events leading up to this beautiful Saturday morning in Port Douglas. I have had a busy three days, to say the least. I left Los Angeles on Tuesday night and arrived into Sydney on Thursday morning. Technically, Australia is 17 hours ahead of PST but I calculate it by thinking, "mom is 7 hours ahead of us minus a day"...keep it simple. The 15 hour flight was a piece of cake compared to the hard night of drinking that followed. I'll fill you in, just keep reading. So, my new favorite drug is Xanax. I popped two, slept for 6 hours woke up and threw down another one and slept for 3 more. The 4 month old that was sitting in the row to the left of me cried most of the flight and it didn't phase me a bit. Maybe my Family Practice doctor is on to something when she suggests I take Xanax during that one week a month when mommy is angry and the kids just don't understand why. I arrived into Sydney at 6:30 AM refreshed and ready to charge. Kerry Jones (Ron's boss' wife) and I checked in, grabbed a cup of coffee and went for a walk around town. It's important to note that Sydneysiders take their coffee very seriously. I was so hopped up on caffeine that when we got back from our jittery stroll we worked out at the gym. Now was that a sight, two Americans trying to figure out how to set the treadmills to an 8 minute per mile pace when the machine is only calibrated in kilometers per hour. We even asked for assistance...can you say dumb Americans?! Kerry and I grabbed a quick (well it was supposed to be but we just had to have one more glass of vino) bite at this great Italian place I read about in Jamie Oliver's magazine: Pendolino. It's located in the historic Strand Arcade. We shared a plate off pasta with veal ragu, hammered down two glasses of wine and showed up late for our 1:45 appointment for a facial followed by a massage. Not only were we late but buzzed from a combination of caffeine and wine. Hell, we're on vacation - right?! The treatments were great but the best part was that the staff thought we were a couple so we "got" the couple massage room. Lucky us, right?! Wait until see the picture of Kerry in her disposable hairnet. True love is blind I guess. I finally met up with Ron around 5:30. We headed over to Longrain restaurant early to have a few drinks before the group arrived. This place was also mentioned in Jamie's magazine but it didn't make my cut because I'm not a fan of Thai food....think "crave and fart nightly, smart ass". Our group of 25 ate in a private room. When I say "ate" I am being generous. Most of us drank and talked about what it was, exactly, that the waitstaff brought to our table. All the dishes were served family style and had a lot of spices. Thai food and red wine do not really compliment one another so I just stopped eating and kept drinking, to the point where the waiter didn't even bother to ask if I wanted more wine, he just poured it. I'm on vacation afterall. The Australian team that joined us for dinner was impressed by the Honeys drinking stamina. Not sure that's something we should hang our hat on but i'll take the compliment. Ron and I passed out around 11:30, woke up drunk at 6 and headed to the airport for our flight to Cairns. At the airport, Ron looks at me and says, "What was that s*** we were eating last night? I think I got so drunk because when I stopped eating I didn't stop drinking. I needed food!". To which I reply, "You know it's gonna be an interesting night when the wine is just meh but I am drinking it like it's Screaming Eagle!". The flight to Cairns was three hours followed by a very curvy 45 minute drive to the resort in Port Douglas. I almost threw up. I'm not sure if it was from the windy road or the hard night of boozing....maybe both. When we got the Sea Temple I decided to go for a run to make myself feel better. Umm yeah, according to the hotel staff, the best route is along the beach on the hard packed sand. Yeah well, their defnition of "hard packed sand" is a lot different than mine and they failed to mention the gail force winds. I was able to finish the 6 mile run but I wasn't happy about it....oh the anger. The entire time I kept thinking, "WTF?! I could have flown to Kauai and saved myself from the 18 hours on a plane. I mean this place looks just like Hanalei!". In retrospect, I should have taken a Xanax, thanks Dr. Mellor. After the drug free frustration subsided Ron and I headed to dinner at Harrison's Restaurant. It was good but not great. Maybe I was still angry from the run because Ron thought it was great but that the chef was a little to enthusiastic about his carrots; " They must have received a large shipment of carrots today babe!" The two best dishes were braised ox cheek and veal sweet breads with scallops. Surprisingly, there were no carrots in either one. We took a taxi to the restaurant but opted for the "public bus" coming back as the 3 mile taxi ride was $18 and the bus was only $10. Yes, I channeled my inner Patty and refused to take a taxi home. At about stop number 10, I look at Ron and say, "I just spent $250 on dinner and I am worried about paying $8 more on a taxi?!". Needless too say, we will not be riding the shuttle again. I hit the bed hard at 9 and am feeling strong this morning. So good, actually, that I am planning on braving the winds again and going for an 8 mile run!! Ron's golfing. Lunch and wine at Bucci then who knows...Scuba diving tomorrow. Bye, for now.