FLOAT LIKE A BUTTERFLY, STING LIKE A BEE!!

28th June 2009

He shouldn't have been allowed out on his own!I knew there'd be trouble!!John had gone to Goroka to get some supplies and was waiting to catch a PMV to come back to Kundiawa.He had put his bus fare in his top shirt pocket and, as a PMV arrived, surged forward with the crowd to get on.Suddenly, he felt a hand furtling in his pocket, so, quick as a flash, he grabbed the pickpocket's hand and prised his bus money from it, endeavouring to break the fingers in the attempt.Being unsuccessful at this endeavour, he then landed the raskal a right hook!This resulted in a great roar from the watching crowd and a few set off in hot pursuit of the raskal.John was then ushered onto the bus first like a hero and given the best seat!That'll teach them to mess with Johnny Boy!I wonder if the raskal's achilles tendons are still intact?

I solemnly related this incident to our children by SKYPE, telling them he was in the dog box for being a naughty boy and fighting, expecting them to be shocked at such behaviour by their normally calm, gentle, peace loving father.They were having none of it and roared with laughter, wondering why he hadn't floored the raskal!John then informed me that from henceforward he wanted to be known as Mohammed!It was the middle of the night when I woke him up.'John, you can't be called Mohammed,' I said.'What the devil are you talking about?' he said, (or something similar, not repeatable in public).'Mohammed can't possibly go with Rosenthal, it just doesn't work!' I said.'Shut up and go to sleep,' came the ungrateful response.So I puzzled about a more suitable name, not knowing a lot of boxing celebrities.'Sugar' definitely didn't fit and I knew he'd have nothing to do with 'Mike'.Then it came to me and I eventually went to sleep.In the morning, when he brought me a cup of coffee in bed (he's a willing morning slave), I accepted the coffee and whispered, 'Thanks Cassius!'Lisa prefers the 'PNG Pounder' and Richard has suggested contacting Don King. I concluded that 'The Simbu Slugger' was the best choice of names and so he shall be called.

John has been behaving for the past couple of weeks though and so was allowed to attend Jake's birthday celebration on Saturday.We booked a meal at a local hostelry and ordered a cake from the bakery, stipulating chocolate, with all our names written round the edges.We also purchased candles and we asked to borrow the school truck, which would allow us to be out after dark - so adventurous!We arrived at the bakery to pick up the cake - chocolate pinis!! I daren't look, expecting lurid orange and lime green icing, which the cakes in the bakery seem to favour.Luckily, it was six inch deep coffee coloured icing with our names, not written round the side as we had asked, but chucked on in a jumble in the middle, with the correct number of names but the inevitable spelling mistakes.We arrived at the "hotel" in good time and deposited the cake in the kitchen with candles and a back up box of matches.We gave clear instructions that seven candles were to be put on each side of the square cake, making 28 in all, lit and brought to the table after our main meal was finished.There seemed to be understanding.We arranged that everyone would order their meal by 6pm to be ready to eat at 7pm. So we ordered. John homed in on the steak - "steak pinis," so chicken (for a change) was the only option!I gingerly ordered prawns and chose a garlic sauce rather than curry.Then off to the bar?"Gin and tonic please" - "Nogat"."Just tonic then please" "Nogat"."OK, a white wine will be fine" "Nogat"."Red vinegar it will have to be then."Yuk!

Everyone arrived and ordered by 6pm and we went to the dining room as arranged at 7pm (we were, not surprisingly, the only diners, despite it being a Saturday night).We sat down and an excited waitress (the only one) whispered could she speak to me, so we went into a corner and she asked should she bring in the cake now!That sorted, I returned to the table where we sat and we sat and we sat and eventually around 8.30pm some food arrived.Cold of course.Two or three people didn't get what they ordered and true to form, my garlic prawns turned up as curried ones, but by that time we were too hungry and fed up to bother about what was on our plates.Then, one of the volunteers reached across my full glass of red vinegar to get to the condiments, tipping the wine all over me!!The red blended quite well with my purple skirt!We finished our meal and again, I was beckoned by the same excited, only waitress.She produced the cake but no sign of candles.I helped her put candles in holders and put holders into cake (where they disappeared under six inches of icing), though unfortunately there weren't sufficient holders for the number of candles(I did purchase them in PNG you understand), so the cake was short by 4 candles!!Did I care by this time, soaked as I was in red wine and feeling slightly nauseous as a result of cold curried prawns and red vinegar.Jake blew out the cake in manly fashion and people said the cake was good, when it was extricated from the clouds of icing.John drove us all home without mishap, where we collapsed, totally exhausted by the whole affair.

Things can only get better, as we are off on holiday next week.We were due to fly out next Saturday to Kavieng on New Ireland, but, quite by chance, we noticed last week in the newspaper that the Air Nuigini flight times had been changed (thanks for the notification).After much chasing, it turns out we now can't fly as arranged on Saturday and have had to bring it forward to Thursday.Shame, two extra days holiday on a Pacific island, which I understand is paradise.Allegedly fresh fish, palm fronds dipping into a deep blue sea and rumour has it that apparently it is safe to go out after dark, we shall see. Then after a few days we fly to Rabaul on New Britain to see a live volcano - we're very excited.Just hope John behaves himself and there's no more fisticuffs, he can save that for the sharks!

Hope holidays and summer weather is being enjoyed by you all.Keep away from that nasty swine 'flu.So far, nothing reported in the Highlands here, though there have been a couple of suspected cases on the coast - hopefully it'll stay there.

Love to all