Dogs here speak spanish and respond to rocks.
Afuera!
Israelis have trust issues.
And Norwegians are an incredibly fit race.
The wave season is coming to a close and there is quite high turnover now amongst the people I have met. We picked up a new roommate at the house after P & S left, Dino, surfer, 22 from Israel. Met him in neixpa but didn't really get to know him, offered him a spot in the room i had when I saw him get into town.
This turned out to be an unfortunate turn for both he and i in the cosmic scheme of misfortune dispersal.
The neighbors Nick and f***ing Darryl, did not bring a goat back as I reported earlier, it was actually a roided out meat chicken they rescued out of a small box among millions in a chicken factory.
Originally they were going to kill the chicken and cook it over a fire on the beach, but then someone named him fluffy, and they eventually realized that they were not made of murderous stuff.
The american youth these days seems to lack a certain bloodlust, that is currently quite plentiful in Mexico, thus far we have been invited to hunt iguanas, armadillos, and snakes by the locals. Crude slingshots and large populations of slow moving animals makes for a plenitude of stonings in the woods. They do eat the animals, but there is a bit of an unsettling cruelty present as well.
Fluffy won the lottery with our boys.
Once at home fluffy became a free range house chicken complete with painted comb and nails. She also s*** all over Dino's new room. Nick and f***ing Darryl always cleaned up after their pet but were occasionally (always) slow to respond.
Dino quietly muttered Hebrew curses.
I say " s*** all over Dino's room" because I basically moved into a cooler, cleaner less mosquitoie room with a Norwegian girl... In general an all around improvement. I kept my stuff in the original room though, and continued to split the price with Dino.
And then everything went horribly wrong.
After making a group trip to the local supermarket where everyone hit the atm, We were all hanging in Dinos and my room until about 11 in the evening. The Norwega and I decided to leave, nick, f***ing Darryl, and Dino remained in the room. When I returned the next morning to eat breakfast and go surfing Dino asked me if I noticed anything about my bag.
It was on the floor and pretty well gone through. Dino said his bag was gone and he found mine in the empty lot across the street.
Passport? Yes still in my bags rain fly pocket...thank you Jesus.
One of the closest calls, my spare keys still remained in the bag as well and the truck was untouched. ( lesson learned here... No more spare keys in bag.) my warm clothes remained too, but my t shirts tank top and light sweatshirt were gone. So was my sure fire flashlight, but not the extra batteries...( lithium ion 123s avail in mex? I think not) actually all of my little pockets and things were emptied. And my medical bag was taken too. thanks for the cipro and anti malarials pops, looks like they will be benefitting someone else this mosquito season though.
I actually think that the medical bag was taken primarily for the condoms in it. There really wasn't anything else too interesting, band aids and other creams and bs. Valuable but not irreplaceable, mostly just a pain in the ass to loose.
Dino lost his bag, sweatshirt, trip photos on thumbdrive ( biggest loss) and about 6000 pesos. They took his wallet and ATM cards but left his books and Id on the floor by the window.
Dino was quite upset, mainly about the loss of his surf footage. I was fortunate, and had the main important stuff with me, wallet, phone... I also couldn't really quantify everything I lost immediately, only that it wasn't critical to my travels, I suppose I was pretty calm about it ( this turned out to be a mistake)
The story was that Dino fell asleep, then nick and f***ing Darryl went to bed and left the room as it had been, light on, window to the street open. Then Dino woke up at about 4 am to a somewhat ransacked room.
Apparently the thief or thieves entered the room while he slept, took his bag from under his bed where he lay, and both of mine from the dresser at the far side of the room, then the left, went across the street, went through the stuff, ate all of Dino's gum ( we found the packaging) and then abandoned my bag, returned Dino's books and ID,did not rob or steal my truck, and left.
Curiously, the thief left all of our surf stuff ( of pretty high value but hard to transport) Dino's iPod and several sets of surf fins ( which are very hard to come by here) the thieves were also strangely compassionate in the way of only taking the valuables and not the "f*** you up" items like passports or Ids. Also curious was that we were robbed immediately after making a big ATM withdrawal, 6000 p for Dino is around 500$.
The land lady told us it had been sort of a repeat crime in neighborhood. On the face of it the crime seems pretty audacious, but in reality if you take into account inherent mexican bravado and the following scenario, its not too outlandish.
you wake up to a robbery, they outnumber you and only have to overpower you, or stab you and leave. Then you tell the police something like, " yea it was a couple Mexican guys, dark hair, mustache, no shirt... Etc." and they say something like "we'll get right on that."
Case closed.
About a week passed Dino never really recovered and I continued to hang with with the Norwegas and also one of my Spanish teachers who had become a good friend, until the day before my departure when Dino pulled me aside and said the following. "I know you took my stuff. My friend told me he saw you do it. I don't want to make a big deal about it I just want it back by tonight or there will be big problems."
s***. In a tight spot.
I polled the house and began to realize that in my absence, everyone had come to the consensus that since I was spared so much in the robbery and that the robbery was sort of compassionate in nature, that I was the most suspicious person in the case. (of course you have to discount the fact that we are in a land of easy pickings and also well known thief haven.) but s***, if you suspect the locals there is basically nothing you can do about it, so it is really pointless to consider them at all.
And to be honest, my defense was as follows.
1) look man, 600$ is not a lot of money to me, (concept lost on an Israeli... Bit racist I know, but f*** him, he almost got me lynched. On average I have found Israelis to be cheap, shrewd, and savvy, this is on average. I have found Americans abroad to be ignorant, loud, and fearful. Each culture is certainly not without its beautiful exceptions, but the average should not be underestimated.
2) why would I want your thumb drive? I am from America....I could get one of those in a damn happy meal.
3) do you know how hard it is to go home with a girl in one night in this town? Let alone convince her to cover up a crime you are going to commit?
4) I'm the one paying the taxes that keep Israel on the map around here, show some respect.
5) why would I eat all of your gum?
Oddly, the last defense seems to be the most sound to me. Wild world.
At any rate it was a remarkable feeling. To have done absolutely nothing wrong, but to watch the social weather around you suddenly darken, and become violently stormy. I grasped a profound new appreciation for the salem witch trials. I also realized the gravity of Dino's Hail Mary, something I think he did not even realize he was exactly doing to me. Was there an Israeli hit squad forming? Had the Mexican police been alerted? In Mexico you are guilty until proven innocent...
Currently I am drinking beer and sipping banana mezcal 10,000 ft up in the mountains of Oaxaca, so worry not about the outcome of the "hidden port showdown" I basically told Dino the following.
You are not getting your stuff back from me on any timeframe. I'll be around until tomorrow if you want to get a hold of me for anything. It is important to me personally, that you don't think I'm a thief. This is the only reason I am talking to your all, if i were the thief, I would just leave.
He stuck to his guns though, and I am pretty sure he stole my iPod charger, a wax comb, and one of my books at the end. Que mala ondas!
I do not hold out much hope for peace in the Middle East any time soon. Neither do they actually. I asked most of them.
One day we went fishing. We caught three fish.
On Norwegas:
One of them was about 6'2" blond, and a former body builder. She was in puerto for 5 months to learn Spanish and surfing. at one time she wondered aloud why she couldn't just meet a tall nice surfer.... What is the world coming to when a 6' Norwegian blond can't get laid? Too bad none of my taller friends could make it down....Andy!
The other was shorter (5'4") and made of 100% muscle (think of a seal, the animal, or the navy) she was also training to be an mma fighter. She was self described, as "being made of left over tank parts", which is accurate. She showed me some takedowns and choked me out a few times, all of this on the main beach too. Lucky for me, I am working on reducing self conscientiousness, i also do not really think an ego is necessary. Better to have them both beaten out of you in public.
Stay tuned for the next episode, temezcal in the mountains with the purest hippies on earth and getting drunk in the afternoon with my new host mom.