24

The next day I left to go back to Bangkok for the third time, hungover to f*** on the plane. This time I did not enjoy the culture or anything about Thailand. The thing with Bangkok is, you have either just arrived as it is a starting point for your travelling, or you have been travelling a while and you are going there to leave to another country, but either way thai people treat you like your f***ing stupid.
I checked into a guest house and booked to do a tour of a floating market, and to go and see a tiger temple. Once I booked it the woman told me not to wear red, yellow, orange, stripes, vests, short shorts or sunglasses. So it sounded pretty safe!! I got picked up at 7am and went to the early morning floating market which was s*** busy. It was quite interesting then I realised it was just like being on Khoa San Road but on water. After that we went to see the river kwae bridge which was good.
Next was the tiger temple. A girl from Holland who was on my tour obviously had not been told a thing, as she was wearing a vest and sun glasses so she had to buy a s*** tiger temple t-shirt for ten pounds!! She was a wierdo anyway so I wasnt arsed. When I finally got to get my picture taken with the tiger, I got told not to stroke them any further up than the middle back as it can be dangerous, so I just stayed as far a way as I could!! It was so wierd, they were massive close up and to actually stroke it was unbelievable and so-real. The furr was really smooth and at one point it felt like stroking a dog!! I got abit carried away and started slapping it harder but got told off! Some people say there drugged up thats why they do not jump up and eat you but as I was leaving the volunteers and experts who look after them were walking them back to were they stay over night and the fully grown tigers were walking and running normal, and playing with toys so if they can do that im sure they would be able to eat you so im not sure if there on smack or not.
As I have been staying in s*** holes for three months with lizards hanging off the ceiling, cockroaches, bed bugs, mosquitos, no air conditioning, and hardly ever with hot water I decided in Indonesia that on my last night before I get to Australia, I would stay in a five star hotel in Thailand to treat myself. A friend from tubing who I met in Indonesia told me about a five star hotel he had heard about which was amazing, so I went online and it looked amazing so I booked to stay there on the last night. Sixty four pound it was, f***ing well cheap!!
As I happily left the middle of Bangkok I arrived at the five star hotel. It was so posh. Most people probably arrive respectable and business like. I got a tuk tuk there and had my swimming shorts and tubing vest on ha he must of thought who the f*** is this and have you got the right place!! f*** it.
A man greeted me and took my bags. As I was checking in I was given a drink and some fruit for free whilst I wait. There was some confusion as I was not on the system, so I went on to my emails to prove I had payed. They had got it mixed up and I was supposed to be staying the previous night and they checked the room availability for the premier room I had payed for. The woman took ages and I had a feeling she was going to say there is nothing left. She eventually called me over and explained there was no premier rooms left, I was f***ing fuming, then she said I am getting upgraded to the suite, and because Im on that floor I get free use of the swimming pool on the roof, free drinks in the bar on the roof before 8pm, gym, sauna and steam room. I could not believe it. I was so made up.
Two men showed me in to the lift. One holding my bags and one holding a tray with a drink and a massive bowl of fruit. They showed me in to the room and then left. One man came back and gave me the key for my room, he sort of come into the room and started talking to me askong where i was from and stuff. He was sound, and we spoke for a while. Eventually he left after about ten minutes. When he was in the room, he seemed as if he was hanging around, then I realised that he was obviously after a tip and im talking about football ha o well.
After he did leave, I could not stop smiling. The room was unbelievable. It had different air conditioning temperatures in three different rooms, a jacuzzi bath and loads of other mad s***! I got in to the bath as quick as I could and pressed the button for the jacuzzi thing to come on. It was my first bath in three months and was amazing. I could not stop laughing, it was perfect after getting f***ed around in Khoa San Road. I watched sky for as long as I could to get full use of the room, then watched another tv in bed. The bed was so comfortable.
I woke up the next morning and went down for my free breakfast. Im used to a free breakfast being tomato and egg on one peice of toast. There was a huge menu which I got shown, and I could pick whatever I wanted. After I ordered he said help yourself to the buffet aswell, which had about eight different types of juice, fruit, cookies, muffins, chocolate, yoghurt, cerial, and loads of other stuff. It was such an amazing place, I was not used to being looked after as most places in asia try to rape you. I was now getting ready for Auz!!!