2 black days in 22 - pretty good going really. And to be honest, I don't think that I can legitimately class this as a black day, as I know what I'm upset about. It didn't start off black, that's for sure. It started off with a hangover...

I've been in Darwin 2 or 3 days now and until last night the only bar I had been to was the Old Victoria Hotel. A backpackers place. Those of you that know me well know that I can find/make fun in almost everyplace - even places that I have said I don't want to go to, once I'm there I make the most of it. But I really wanted to try somewhere new last night.

During the day I went for a walk around town, a kinda reconaisance mission. I saw this place called Discovery, but it just said that it had live music on the outside.�I get back to the hostel, not really any the�wiser�and my neighbour was outside. He is cute, but jailbait (he's 22. I think he likes me. crumbs!). Anywho, he says that Discovery has a club with 3 rooms. So I text Chris to let him know that I'm possibly found us somewhere good to go - hurrah!

Okay now this is where some of the bad feeling kicks in. I think that I am being ostracized by the rest of the group. It doesn't help that I'm staying in another hostel. To be honest, I saw it as a matter of time for some people, but I'm afraid that one guy I was getting on with really well has bulls***ted me. Also a couple of people that I did have a good rapport with�left already for other tours. One guy I hope to hook up with when he returns to the UK, as he's looking to start a film course in Ealing, which is pretty cool (not a bad dancer either �but again is 22yr old jailbait).

Anywho, I arranged to meet Chris at his hostel with the others at 7.30pm, with a view to finding somewhere to eat. I mistimed the walk from my hostel to theirs, and got there�15 minutes early. If it was the other way round it wouldn't be much of a problem because my hostel has an open bar you can sit in. The bar in the other is behind a security door and you need a swipe card to get in. I only had Chris's number, so I texted him to let me into the bar, saying that I don't mind waiting longer. I get no reply. Then at 7.45pm they all come out. Granted they had already been drinking and Chris�says 'I thought you were at Cavenaghs'. And "Oh, we're all going to this restaurant that behind Cavenaghs, has no one told you?'. Anywho, I�let this go cos�like I said they had all been drinking.�Felt annoyed that I had been left out of the drinking.

I can't knock the meal. It went well. I didn't feel left out there. I felt mostly fine. Apart from this English guy who kept blanking me -�I'm sure he thought I was coming onto him. But no, he's too 'run of the mill' English. I can get that at home if I wanted, which I don't.

So then we move onto the Old Vic. A couple of people had just finished a tour and were meeting others there as the 'end of tour dinner' thing. I said that I'd go check out Discovery and report back, which I did. It was a little empty, but I reckoned it would warm up after a couple of hours. It is not a great place - more Hammersmith Palais than Fabric. But The Old Vic was worse - a bloody live band on killing Marvin Gaye's Sexual Healling. Good grief.

Anywho, I couldn't muster the will to have a good time�there a 3rd night in a row. Plus English guy was blanking me terribly and I felt like slapping him. So I left. I did want to go to Discovery by myself, but I'd drunk too much by then (white wine with dinner that did it), so I walked home with tears in my eyes.

As I get to my door and see Donovan (the neighbour) getting dressed. He's just leaving for Discovery now. I ask if I can tag along and he says he needs to check with his sisters as they are picking him up. They say yea, so I end up hooning about Darwin with 3 complete strangers. I must say that I was afraid - they could have done anything with me. But they reminded me of some of Mandy's friend, so I felt 90% safe.

I had a good boogie in Discovery - I got bought quite a few drinks. I was a novelty, as it was playing mostly hip-hop and I was the only black girl in there �I was dancing on a podium. One of the girls found $80 in the ATM - lucky cow! Felt a bit like a minor celeb.

I have become a real jagermeister drinker. I know I liked it in England, but I've drunk loads of it here. I am quite immune to it compared to others.

Anywho, at some point between 3.30am and 5.30am I went home.

Got my first proper lie in this morning, and my first hangover. Both didn't last very long. And I have packed Berroccas and Ibruprofen, so was alright in a couple of hours.

Donovan was about. I dyed his hair for him - how random is that?!?

Right, back to the bad feeling. This kicks in when I get a reply from a text I sent to Emma saying that they are in a hired car and visited the jumping crocs again and are now going to the crodile farm. I call Chris, I say I would have liked to have gone to the crocodile farm. He says that there wasn't even space as there are 5 of them already. That is fair enough, I don't like it, but that's how it is. The BS comes in when it sounds like he's faking interference on the telephone. Suddenly I can't hear him, but it all the interference disapears when it comes to saying 'This is a dodgy connection, look I'll give you a call later'.

So I'm switching between being pissed�off and upset. I don't want to hang the tour lot as they don't want me there and I don't want to hang with Donovan and his lot tonight as his sister got into a fight last night (I'd left by that point), so maybe best to not go out with them tonight. Possibly tomorrow, when the fuss has died down some.

Got a text from Chris. I replied quite curtly. Maybe I shouldn't have done. Oh well.
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