Dear Mum and Dad

Thank you for a wonderful time in America, it really has been the best road trip ever (FACT) and we have done so much and seen so much and had so many laughs and good times, (and I am not even going to mention that incident with dad). And so we wave you goodbye and head off by ourselves to Mexico. And though it is sad to see you go, it is a probably a good time to go. If we spent any more time with you guys we would morph even more into dad's humour and, more importantly, I am currently in the lead in our marathon game of cards.

The last ten days have been so event-filled and action packed yet my blogs from America seem to only be about toilets so I am going to make an effort and tell you some of the things that we have done. For example, we went on a wine tasting tour of the Napa Valley and drunk some very nice wine and some Chardonnay. And the tour guide was a man who could talk more than anyone I have ever met. And I bet more than anyone you have ever met either. From the moment we got on his bus at eight in the morning until when he dropped us off about seven in the evening, he talked non-stopped. he told us everything there is to know about the winemaking process, plus how to order food in a restaurant, which olive oil you should buy, what his father thinks about his job. You name it, this guy could have an opinion on it. It was all very interesting but quite sleep inducing as well. Which was great. you could either listen to endless information about why the Golden Gate Bridge is called the Golden Gate Bridge or you could have a little snooze. I snoozed through that bit so have no idea why the Golden Gate Bridge is called that. Sorry.

So although it is sad to see you go, at least I have Donna to keep me company during our last day of San Francisco together...except Donna has decided that today should be a shopping day which means that I have been left all alone. Apparently, I am a pain in the arse when Donna is trying to shop so she would prefer me to bugga off and entertain myself. I can see her point, I am a pain in the arse. I can survive about ten minutes pretending to be interested in what she is looking at before I revert back to my 5 year old self.

My own personal shopping trip involved going to Macy's for five minutes, deciding it was too expensive and so spending 10 minutes in Ross, a cheaper version of TK Maxx, buying everything I need and then finding myself back in the Irish bar, trying to kill three hours until Donna finishes. I should be sad to be alone but I am wearing the new jeans I bought which have considerably less holes than my previous ones. And I will admit I was wrong. Jeans without lots of holes can be just as comfortable as jeans with lots of holes. Who would have thought it?

The last few days have been spent in San Francisco, hanging out in the Frisco Bay. We even sat on a dock at one point waiting for Donna but I didn't notice the tide rolling anywhere. I did see a seal. It looked like a log in the water. It is amazing how things can be special, just because you know what it is. If the seal had turned out to be a log, I would have been disappointed but because I saw a seal, it made my day. It is a bit like Alcatraz and the Golden Gate Bridge. Alcatraz looks like a small island with lots of ugly buildings on it. The Golden Gate Bridge is pretty impressive but there is another bridge next to it which looks even better which doesn't have a name (well it does but I don't know what it is). Especially when you don't know why it is called the Golden Gate Bridge. So my point is islands can be islands and bridges can be bridges but these are definitely the most comfortable jeans I have ever bought.

So San Francisco. What a lovely little town. I have fallen in love with it. Maybe it is all the weirdos and crazy people, maybe it is despite them all. But the place has an energy which makes you leave your heart here. It is a city that you feel like you know yet none of us can remember what movies it has been in. Other than Star Trek IV The Voyage Home obviously. And maybe So I Married An Axe Murderer but that might have been somewhere else.This is a place where you could live and be happy. Or it is a place that you could live and be crazy. I particularly liked the crazy Chinese Christian bloke shouting that the entire queue for the cable car was going to be damned. He was enthusiastic to say the least.

So the cable car was fun (we were in the queue being shouted at). I got to ride on the side hanging off as it went up the silly big hills and down them all again and round the corners. So much fun. And we went on the tram as well. Which is very similar to the cable car but not as expensive and you don't get to hang off the side. And then we got the ferry over to Sausalito, which is a small town across the Bay. We went there because it sounded a bit like sausage and we thought there might be some sausages to eat there. There wasn't. But it was pretty anyway. And then we went to Fisherman's Wharf. Which isn't really a wharf but more like a few streets with lots of restaurants and souvenir shops there. And we went to Union square. Which is a square. And we went to see a play. And it was about American Football. And dancing. And was quite a lot about being gay. And when it wasn't about being gay, it was very homoerotic because lots of men dancing around in very skin tight tights. Which has made me think, can tights be anything other than skin tight? I think the play was meant to be more thought provoking than that.

All our love

Jim and Donna