One night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble......
3 nights makes you............errr...............no comment.

saturday 2nd feb til tuesday 4th feb

met up with jonnie about 9pm after he landed and straight out on the town. poor thing has not slept for nearly 2 days as his flight was delayed in manchester due to snow.

no stopping him though, and some time later we end up in the famous Nana plaza (naughty area).

cant really remember what happened, but me and jonnie ended up with a bottle of whiskey and 2 girls in some underground nightclub at 4am.

went for some food and jonnies chair slipped in the wet and he sent a table flying and covered some poor couple in their noodle soup.

staggered back to hotel at about 7am.

hotel wanted paying at 9am so because i was too lazy to phone nat west and lift the block on my card, i woke jonnie up and borrowed his card to get some money out as he was next door to me.

half asleep and still hammered i got back to reception minus jonnies card............oh dear, think i must have left it in the machine.

prepared for a severe beating, jonnie asked "who had died". luckily i think he was still drunk and jet lagged and i got off lightly.

jonnie got up and we decided to go practice our thai and get some brekkie. so we stopped at a place we knew around the corner that only locals go to and ordered some chicken noodle soup.

minutes later we got what looked like dog food soup. actually to be fair i think pedigree chum would have refused it. looks like we need to brush up on our thai.

went for a beer with jonnie and ended up getting hammered somewhere.

decided to cancel hong kong due to the weather problems in china. getting in would be ok, but getting out could be expensive and we really wanted to go to vietnam. so i rang the airports and cancelled the flights.

just started a power knap when john mcgarry burst in the room and wanted to show me what he had bought shopping, i could have killed him.

not sure what happened after that but ended up in reception about 4am with loads of bottles of beer having a party. the 2 jonnies b*****ed off and left me to pay for the beer. only problem was i only had 50 Baht which is about 80p.
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The Phatpong Situation

went to another naughty/dodgy area called phatpong in the afternoon and settled upon one of the few bars that were open. phatpong is a night market, so most bars only open later.

anyway ordered a couple of beers and before we had blinked jonnie had drunk about 10 tiger beers. had a laugh with the ugly bar girls and started betting on games of yahtzee and connect 4 and ended up buying them loads of drinks. then i think they ended up buying themselves loads of drinks and whacking it on our bill.

jonnie went in to turbo drink mode and joked with one of the girls he would take her home. another girl said she was jealous so he said he would take her home as well.
thinking nothing of it we ordered another beer and the 2 girls reappeared with their coats and handbags!!!

never seen jonnie sober up so quick, the 2 girls were serious, jonnie was looking terrified. problem is you can not joke with thai girls or they "lose face".

looking for the exit, the mama san (rock hard manageress) saw him and picked up a mini base ball bat.

only joking says jonnie, and a hundred quid later managed to clear the bar bill and the girls.

a very expensive afternoon, john and i were crying with laughter. jonnie had had enough so headed off home, john and i went off and had some sushi and sake in a restaurant around the corner and then went down to "soi cowboy".

staggered in about 6am again minus a load of money as usual.

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next day decided to head off to the beach at Pattaya and finally got a nice taxi that was nice and new. Only problem was it blew up just as we got in to Pattaya and loads of smoke started coming inside the car.

not really a problem unless you have a child lock on your door..... having nearly choked to death everyone else who had exited within seconds eventually decided to let me out.

next installment Pattaya..........