Kuala Lumpur and the Transvestite Date

june 10-13

Kuala Lumpur was great in the modern bits, but just the same old dirty rat infested streets everywhere else.

I was told that the "Batu caves" were a must see. It has the world's biggest buddha!

Odd, nearly everywhere i have been so far has the same claim to fame.

Anyway i decided to go, so hopped on the bus to be bitterly dissapointed as usual.

Yes it was a big bhudda, but looked about 10 years old and commisioned by disney. Not quite the archaelogical find i had imagined from 8000 BC.

The caves were damp and full of litter, and people going crazy getting on their knees and giving money to and worshipping bits of tinsel stuck in the rock.

When i was a child, we had some plastic father christmas faces you could hang on the wall. I was thinking maybe of getting a blow up santa outside, and then putting one of the plastic faces in a cave somewhere with a bit of tinsel, and seeing if this had the same affect.

Each to their own, but i just left shaking my head in disbelief.

Anyway, my father always taught me never to talk politics or religion, so i will end it there.

So back on the bus after 3 minutes after wrestling with my conscience whether to buy a flashing buddha wall clock that sings,i decided to go up the tower. The town has the famous Petronas towers that where once the tallest skyscrapers in the world, and also an observation tower which is one of the highest as well.

You can go inside it and go almost up to the top and have a cuppa, the same as in Seoul.

I had seen lots of adverts for the new movie, Kung Fu Panda. There is a massive shopping mall built on to the Petronas Towers, so i went to the cinema there and watched it.

Seeing as i had lost most of my clothes, i had to go shopping and buy some more. The markets here are just full of traders trying to rip you off, and make the prices up as they go, so it was hard work getting fitted out again. Beer is very expensive as well, and it is insanely hot and sweaty, so i was not that sad to leave.

But before i went i needed a hair cut, so found a salon that looked fairly cheap. As i sat in the chair and the assistant put my bib on, i noticed that she was a he and had clearly taken a shine to me.

If only she/he spent a bit more time trying not to scalp me as opposed to asking me out and whispering in my ear and touching me alot, i would not have ended up looking like i had just had my hair set on fire.

How hard is it to use a trimmer????

So then he/she starts crying when i asked for someone that actually worked in a hair salon. So then i get the manageress, and she at least did my hair properly, but she could not understand why i was not taking up he/she on a date.???

Get me out of Malaysia.

I had decided to take a detour to Borneo in order to climb the highest mountain in Asia, mount kinabalu.

I could get a flight from Kuala Lumpur direct to the town nearby to the mountain, so off i went.

Next Installment......................
Ready for the olympics............