This trip's TOP (Token Odd Person) turns out to be an English girl called Lisa. Initially she just comes across as a bit of a jolly hockey sticks, but a more irksome side emerges over the first week; she has a habit of continuously talking about whatever pops into her head at any moment. Complete self-absorbed rubbish mostly, and then finishing with a little embarrassed laugh. Before long people just tune out when she starts to speak, but what makes it worse...

Our train arrived at 5 am, which was a bit of a rude awakening after a late night of beer drinking and card playing. Too early to check into our hotel we walked around the central lake where everyone was doing tai chi and various exercises. We then had breakfast at another street kids' café called KOTO, Know One, Teach One, a fabulous enterprise set up by an Australian guy a few years ago; they are now opening up branches all over Vietnam. Hanoi is a ...

After the pleasures of our last stop Hue, the ancient capital of Vietnam, is a severe disappointment. En route we visited Marble Mountain Pagoda, which was a serious waste of time, it reminded me of China, a lot of climbing of steps to see, well, not very much, an average view and yet another pagoda. Hmmmm. Plus it was raining. You see, all this travel is not always exotic and exciting, sometimes it's just a case of hauling yourself up another mountain to be ...

At last we have arrived in shopping Mecca, I can just unroll my Gucci shopping prayer mat and lie down and feel like I've arrived in heaven. It's The Place for tailor made clothes, Chinese lanterns, pearls, art, lacquerware. We all go into a complete shopping frenzy - for the first afternoon our tour group just run around like headless chickens, ordering clothes, getting measured, seeing what everyone else was buying, ordering the same, but bigger and better an...

Nha Trang is a beach resort - a complete and welcome contrast to the hustle and bustle of Saigon. We visited the local mineral mud baths, and paid extra to get a 'double tub' to ourselves rather than bathe with the common herd. The advertisements hilariously promised that it would be 'doubly exciting' and showed a picture of a sexy young Vietnamese couple cavorting in a tub. No sooner had we got settled into our tepid mix of brown gunk than up popped the resor...