Hotel Lella

Let's speak the truth!

This place is a dog box!

But! It's booked, paid and non refundable.

Karni (hefty young Indian lad being kept cool with a pedastool fan that doesn't stand upright) is good hearted enough and is first to be honest enough to calculate the fee for room according to not having to pay anymore city tax than is necessary. But, the extra €5 for the air conditioning remote. That's where I draw the line! I talked it down to a set €10 for entire stay. But, let's not pretend that's where the fun n games ends!

In attempting to locate my Room (told 109, when 102 was the correct one) I actually found my key did open 109 (to find a hot young thing laying in bed). Now! This may seem like a stroke of luck but I became slightly concerned! If my key can open another room, let's do some "Russian Room roulette". Low and behold, my key opened another room! To cut a long story short I let Karni know. He seemed confused and concerned (both perfectly understandable but very well acted, I might add!). You know what, I thought, it's too late, I'm too hangry and I need a place to lay! Done deal. Just deal!

It does not stop there!

The bath mat is already out and used. There is some soap in a cup and I'm not even going to mention the state of the dunny brush (these are spawn of devil at the best of times!). Everything else seems in order so for €60 a night I'll suck it up. Good location and great local eateries all around!

...Why anyone still uses a thick, heavy 1973 quilt on a hotel bed, I'll never ever know! Get it off! Leave the sheet with a simple runner. It brings it up 123%! Some people just have no idea! Needless to say, that heavy ugly red paisley quilt was rolled up and thrown aside! I rearranged some furniture and all is well!

The bed is as hard as a rock, but, thankfully these days I sleep ok so it ain't a problem. At the end of the day, I've been to hell in a hand basket and back so this is nothing! I roll with it and am proud to just accept the hand I've been given! Unlike many I know, I just don't need to stay at a Hilton or Four Seasons! I'd rather spend my extra on food, wine and fun!

I sleep in my room and hope for decent wi-fi. That's it!

Hopefully no one else works out their key opens everyone else's door to room.s! I'm pretty sure they won't and I'll come out unscathed, more the wiser and richer in knowledge and experience!

...Time to ramp up that cheap n nasty air conditioning system and actually 'live' and experience rather than just cocoon in a luxurious 5 star suite that could, essentially, just be anywhere in the free world!

The B52's said it best: Roam (Rome) if you want to, Roam around the world!