22/3/2011

It was Dad's birthday and not checking the date's as so often I do, I completely forgot until the next day. Sorry Pa.

Back to the city centre where I sorted out my train to Ahmedabad, got my phone unlocked, sim card and credit, a 16GB USB (turned out to be 1.8 which would explain the 3.50 pound price I haggled on the street) and an adaptor, all for reasonably cheap.

Then bartered for a Spurs tank top but couldn't get it for under my 1.50 budget! Then bartered for a can of lynx costing 75p. It was a fun day just arguing prices with everyone but that was to continue for a long time!

Arriving back at the hostel at 6 following some tasty vegetarian curry, I decided to work in Bollywood with some girls from the hostel and dozens of other white tourists.

So we got a minibus to some 5-star resort where they were filming a big film and straight away they chose a few of us to wear suits whilst the others ate! I was excited, expecting to be wearing a suit and getting on screen but the only problem was, nothing fitted me!

I ended up with a giant shirt too big, a sleeveless pullover that was school grey and terrible and some half-decent trousers, whilst the others, including one guy, had proper pimp looks! So after getting geared-up, some bloke did my make-up (yes a man not a woman) and then a chinese-looking man tried to do my hair (yes, again, a man not a woman). He styled it terribly so I took his wax and did it myself. Job done!

All the girls looked nice in dresses but I still didn't feel right in this shocking clobber! Things then got a bit worse. I left the make-up and costumes and headed down alone for food. Problem was, this hotel was monstrous and all I knew was we were eating a buffet outside at the back of the hotel. But where I was instructed by hotel staff, I ended up amongst all the actors and posh people eating in the restaurant and drinking at the bar.

Sticking out like a sore thumb, I then went through the security arches to the car park where there were stunning views across the sea of the city and palm trees in well-kept gardens. Luckily, some guy eventually sent me on the right tracks and I enjoyed a delicious buffet for free as well as a few soft drinks.

Then it was time to act. On set, I got placed with the other chosen tourists to sit at a dinner table, with glorious views, pretending to drink fake wine and eat (but not eat!) cold food!

It was such a laugh to begin with (at 11pm), with this Argentinian guy on my table cracking me up, really taking the michael out of what he was supposed to be doing, sniffing the wine, scraping his plate, and making noises of pleasure at the taste of his food. I was a bit worried the big shot director was going to kick-off at us!

But after repeating this action dozens and dozens of times, by 7am we were shattered. And we had had the short straw as the girls from my hostel hardly had to act and got to sleep and watch tv for several hours upstairs! On the plus side, I earned 500rupees, a whopping seven pound. And, I sneakily got a photo with the Bollywood girl star outside the toilets. Almost got one with Imran Khan (a big actor in India) but they wouldn't allow it so we had to settle for a short chit-chat with some others in the men's!

All I remember amongst nodding off at most of the cuts was an annoying producer screaming: "Quiet!" and being given a crappy box of snacks on departure. The sarnies were about all worth eating.

Seven quid for 10-11 hours of your time? Well, it was an experience.