Drinking in Utah

Last night Kevin, Wendy and I went out in Moab to explore and have a few drinks. The majority of Utah's population is Mormon and with this influence on the legislature they have a number of laws in accordance with their beliefs which make it difficult to drink.

The first bar we went into (only one of the two in Moab) we proceeded up to the bar and sat on the padded saw horses that they had for bar stools. A bar maid came up to us and asked if we were members. Apparently to drink at bar in Utah you have to be a member. Fortunately for $4 you can become a member and drink - yeah this is a winner of a law to curb drinking. Kevin joined so we could all get a drink. After a pint or two we were served by a second bar maid who was built like a brick s***e-house and had a sense of humor to match. After getting our beers and inquiring where we were from she declared that Australians and English were alright and that she didn't like Arab's. She noted that if an Arab came into the bar she would throw them out. This left us all a bit bemused and wondering how many Arabs generally visit Moab and then decide to go for a beer!

As a small foot note at this point I have to say that the beer in America so far has be fantastic. The big commercial beers such as Bud, Coos and Miller are crap but each place we've been to has had a number of locally brewed beverages. There is also a good choice of ale, pils, larger or stout. I thought beer might be an issue in the states but on this front I have been pleasantly surprised. One note worthy local beer in Utah if only for the name and the slogan is Polygamy Porter, "Why settle for just one".

Later in the evening we moved to the second bar in town, Eddie McStiffs. We walked in and went up to the bar and were advised that we didn't need to be a member but we had to eat to drink at the bar, however if we sat in the 'Beer Den', a roped off area for beer drinking lepers at the side of the room we could order and drink beer without ordering food. We proceeded to the beer den, like the lepers that we were, and waited for the waiter to take our orders. Between getting to the beer den and the waiter appearing Wendy decided that she was all beered out so wanted to order a cocktail. Once this was explained to the waiter we then had to move back to the bar and order food as they couldn't serve anything but beer in the beer den. So amused with this system we wandered back to the bar and started perusing the menu. The barmaid who had talked to us upon arrival pointed out that all we had to order was corn chips to technically be eating, thus allowed to order a cocktail and beer and drink at the bar. 70cents later we had bucked the system and were drinking away merrily.

An hour or so later we had to head off to meet Andrus for a ride back to the campsite. We settled up and headed for the door with yours-truly in the lead. About ten paces from the door a waitress coming the the other way tripped over herself and let the plates and salsa dishes she was carrying fly through the air. The salsa managed to land down the left side of my t-shirt. In response to the flying relish. Being a bit tipsy I immediately cracked up laughing uncontrollably as I wiped the chunks of salsa off myself. The other two joined in appreciating the general mirth of the situation. What made it even funnier was the way the waitress and bar manager went into damage control mode and started scurrying about apologizing and getting towels to clean me off - me thinks this may have be due to the fact that the US is an ultra litigious society and they may have been afraid of being sued for assault with a deadly condiment and ensuing mental anguish (I'll never order Mexican again!!!). After some more wiping and kowtowing the manageress presented me with a Eddie McStiff's t-shirt to make further amends, it also made my fellow travelers happy as I had been wearing the same shirt for three days.

Postscript: A couple of days later we also fell afoul of some more of Utah's evil alcohol discouragement laws. We were about to go and buy beer in a supermarket in Moab when Andrus warned us that full strength beer was only sold at 'liquor stores' in Utah. Having seen the same beer that we had been drinking previously in the supermarket the day before I went to see for myself. Approaching the beer isle I could see identical beer on the shelves, there was no difference in packaging from a distance. Picking up a bottle I saw than rather than 5% alcohol (v/v) it was only 3% (v/v). If I hadn't looked at the fine print on the side I wouldn't have known!!!! This is evil and deceptive selling beer that looks alike. Ha! We didn't fall prey to this devious ploy to sell dilute beer!!!! Beermonsters 1 Mormons 0