Executive Summary - Bergen & Fjords

• Saw: Bryggen UNESCO World Heritage Area, Mt Floyen (and cable car!), Naeroyfjord, Hardangerfjord, Folgefonna glacier, waterfalls, fish markets, what drunk Norwegians look like at 4 am on a Sunday (not pretty), trolls/viking/sealskin/knit merchandise for sale

• Did: Hiked on a glacier - donning crampons & an ice axe!, sled down a ski slope, kayaked in a fjord, swam in a fjord, contemplated purchasing various viking merchandise for Chicago Bears fan of a brother-in-law, bought a Christmas present and souvenirs, spent way too much on just about everything, wandered the streets of Bergen

• Ate/Drank: Gravlax, smoked whale, good lefse, fiskesuppe, and lots of self catered muesli breakfasts

• Favourite part about Bergen: No question, the fjords and especially the glacier hike!

• Least favourite part about Bergen: Refer to sub-section 'How F**king Expensive is Norway!!'

• Life-altering revelation which has contributed to my search for universal truth: Once I get myself out in the outdoors I really enjoy it. Provided there are no biting insects or ledges.

• Current career thought: Photographer and caption-writer for corporate motivational posters.

How F**king Expensive is Norway!!

This is the phrase heard round the hostels, no doubt in several different languages if I could speak any besides rusty French. See, you HEAR about Norway being expensive and nod and smile and think 'extra couple of dollars for a beer, whatever, Rome has beers for 4 or 5 euro'. But you don't REALLY appreciate it till you experience it for yourself.

Try AU$13 for 400 ml beer (US $10 for 12-14 oz)

AU$12 for a cup of coffee

Petrol is AU$4 a litre (US$3 a litre so...about US $12 a gallon?) and they make the stuff there!

Punnet of Strawberries AU$10 (to be fair these are bloody good strawberries)

Essentially nothing is less than 50 KR (AU$10)...maybe a litre of milk is 20 KR (AU$4). No one dines out in Norway because the average main meal is 200 KR (AU$40) - without drinks, sides or anything else, just the main course. Norwegians regularly go across the border to Sweden to stock up on goods because it's much cheaper there (relatively speaking).

Even the supermarkets are expensive, though - I bought 5 potato dumplings, 600g salted lamb, a 6 pack of beer and a litre of milk for 350 KR (AU$70) to feed 3 of us in Stavanger one night! So the thing is that, in the rest of Europe you can spend a lot of money, or choose cheap options and get along ok. Norway just doesn't have a cheap option (even a medium pizza is AU$30).

So...moral of the story is...My recipe to staying sane when faced with horrendous Norwegian costs is: 40% getting over it, 40% self-catering, and 20% alcohol-free days.