So, we are quarter of the way through our travels, so we thought we'd write a summary of the quirks and annoyances of India and its people.

Quirks:

1. There are actually quite a few Indian redheads.

2. You are either husband and wife, or friends.

3. All shops sell one of the following: bangles, brass, beads, snacks, bags, hippy trousers, shawls, shells, wooden items, fruit, or general plastic tat. If you want anything else you're b*****ed.

4. Coca cola and Pepsi make every drink in the universe.

5. There are no supermarkets.

6. Plaits are very vogue.

7. Coal under children's eyes is acceptable.

8. There is a severe lack of meat.

9. Dhal/ thali is a suitable food for breakfast, lunch, and tea, apparently.

10. Hot milk on cornflakes is an option.

11. Boys/men often hold hands.

12. God forbid women should reveal any flesh above ankles, or bare your shoulders. But it's OK for your belly to hang out.

13. Indian TV/acting is crap, on a level with primary school video projects. Bring back strictly and bake off!

14. I have adopted the name Mary, as Marie is unpronounceable.

15. People love to play the game 'guess my age', and the FAQs are always 'where you from?' 'you have job?' (I've given up with speech therapist, but they marvel at 'engineer', of course).

16. Everything is everyone's business.

Annoyances:

1. Chucking rubbish, of any kind, out the window, is common practice, and is not seen as a guilty act. This behaviour is encouraged from a young age, as we witnessed at the station by a 2 year old, who carefully emptied her juice carton onto the floor before chucking it nonchalantly behind her.

2. Drivers pretend to know every destination, even if they don't have a bloody clue.

3. Some religious people think its acceptable to go round blessing you, whether you want it or not, and then demand money. This can be as subtle as holding out their hand, or bellowing at you whilst grasping your head, as happened to Hugo. Ha ha ha, hilarious to watch.

4. Some people will get as much money out of you as possible, such as demanding a 100% tip, which is incredibly frustrating.

5. We are, as white people, targets for beggars, who can be very persistent.

6. Everyone has a hotel to recommend to you. Room, sir, room?

7. Getting off the train is the achievement of the day. The Indian system appears to be shove, push, heave yourself on in to zero space before allowing people to get off. Absolutely absurd.

8. It's impossible to know where you are, due to the nonexistence of road name signs. Hallelujah for GPS!

9. The starring.

10. Oh, did I mention the starring?