TEN OBSERVATIONS FROM GREECE (mostly from Santorini)

10. LAZINESS - General statement: all Greeks are lazy. Look at the economy - case closed, yes? Have a look at the lack of gardens around the joint - concrete is the landscape of choice. Lazy.

9. WEATHER - Pretty bloody good. When we arrived in Santorini the locals apologised for the bad weather - there was a bit of cloud cover about. Carry on. Come to Melbourne.

8. ORGANISATION - Some of history's greatest minds were Greek. This is a race that is largely responsible for some of the world's most significant technological breakthroughs. Unfortunately that is ancient history. Watching airport staff try to organise queues at Santorini Airport was like watching a limbless mute trying to herd a dozen cats.

7. TOILET PAPER - (hotels and good quality restaurants excluded) "Do not throw toilet paper in the toilet".

Seriously? Are you aware that the very name of this everyday hygene article is derived from the act that you are trying to prevent? Why even bother with the bowl at all? Perhaps I should relieve myself in the bin and cut out the middle man.

6. RELAXATION - One bonus about the Greeks being lazy is the fact that it's very easy to relax. If you look like you're in a hurry you get politely told to take it easy.

5. RESTAURANTS - There are a lot of great restaurants in Santorini - Fira in particular. However, there's also plenty that aren't that good. Ask a local to recommend some places, and you'll have some beautiful meals. You'll also find that the staff are very hospitable and you'll often get a complimentary dessert and/or entree.

4. LANGUAGE - I've decided that if I don't understand it, it's not a language. Most European languages I get, can sort of understand, whatever. Greek is not a proper language. There is no learning this language. They should change it.

3. SUNSETS - In select locations throughout Santorini you will see one of the greatest sunsets in the world. This is also true in Athens, but to a lesser extent. Check it out, it's rad.

2. ACCESS - If you're a struggler in the access department, Santorini is not for you. There's no chance that a wheelchair-bound or unfit person could negotiate the prime tourist spots on the island. Seriously, the illustrations in Dr Seuss's books depict tamer pedestrian routes.

1. THE VIEW - In Santorini the views are nothing short of stunning. Nuff said.