Come on boys you are seriously slacking! 1 we know you are in Namibia or perhaps you have even made it to South Africa. 2 We know internet access is no longer an issue.

So lets have a serious update please.

 Where are all the Off Exploring fans? If we want the boys to keep us amused we have to do our bit and post messages. Serious pat on the back goes to Alex but i can not believe that Wincanton Weight Watchers have deserted their most remote member ?

Hi Alastair and Henry

Thanks for all your pics and postcards . What a fantastic experience and you are documenting it so well . I expect the prospect of a nine to five seems very distant .... for now! Alastair - in addition to his nefarious activities as an online bookie , Tom G has started up a little sideline as a sports reviewer for that industry , writing match summaries etc. for their websites. Might be of interest to you until that big offer from Goldman Sachs comes in . You are probably keeping yourself amused by reading occasional match reports of England's disastrous Rugby team .7 defeats on the spin including humiliation at Twickenham by Argentina. The Scottish contingent can never have been so happy ! To compound the misery at Chateau G , Spurs got stuffed by Reading ,Liverpool by the Scum (Arsenal) and England's finest cricket 11 by the Australian presidents 11. (Not their A's or B's - more like their J's or K's) . Unless Leman is in charge expect a phone call soon. In their eagerness to drive their handicaps ever downward my boys seem to have mislaid your golf grip thingy so unless a search proves fruitful you will have to let me know where to get a replacement. I played at your club a few weeks back and am looking forward to you inviting me there for a game when you get back . In the meantime from one fat b....ard to another, bon (rest of the )voyage .

Thank you for the photos of Alastair Henry. Keep them coming particularly if they show off what by now must be an ultra slim profile? Wincanton weight watchers will surely be keen to see the results of months of deprivation!

Hen, this is just a reminder to get me some good presents before you come home- thanks

xxxxx

Sutton Scotney 3  -  Micheldever  0

Message for Mr H MacHale esq BA (Edin)

Message reads:

 Members of the board have been disappointed with your recent lack of attendance at PFF functions, meetings and sessions. It gives us great concern that the co-founder, co-president and co-secretary as well as chair of the wine comitte, clerk for the beer comitte and Master of the Rod for the Kazakstani Wheelbarrow Appretion (KWA) group has failed to grant us his presence these last few months.

I am obliged to remind you that these positions are highly sought after and the Co-Chairmen Messers Wilson and Keogh are in the process of reviewing your position with much consternation.

Co Treasurer

ps never known such damned insolence in all my life . . .

Killie in semi-finals of League Cup!!  Beat Motherwell 3-2 at RP last night. Semis not until end January, but draw takes place this Thursday (Nov 9). Celtic beaten by Falkirk on penalties!

Killie also drew 2-2 with Hibs at Easter Road on Saturday.

Dear Alistair,  I am happy to confirm that the original epipen was safely delivered BACK to the Old House, Wonston, having lurked for several months in the Egyptian postal system.  No doubt its contents are now valid for dealing with allergies to elephant.  No doubt also the Brit. Embassy's refusal to shell out a few piastas (?) to release this from Cairo post office in Aug., has cost our Post Office huge amounts to have it returned!  We could see if our lurchers would morph into elephants if epipen was administered now.  Any advice Aimee??

So glad you had such a cool time in Maun.  All we remembered was acres of corrugated iron roofs! Good luck in the salt pans & the Kalahari.  Don't forget that the bushmen would always agree that BIG bottoms are very useful for storing emergency fat in hard times.  Sorry, Wincanton Weight Watchers,but this is a cheeky fact!

All love Mum   XXXOOOO 

Big Marge get your reading specs out and take a trawl through all the wonderful photos country by country and you and the girls wont fail to spot the giant willy!

What picture of a giant willy? The girls here never normally miss anything like that, although trust Aimee to spot it

Big Marge

Probably time you cut your hair again with that bat population lurking around.  Cool photos - keep them coming!

Are you sure you have not mixed Dan up with Martin??

All love, and mind those bats.  Mum