I imagine how many traveller has asked this question while gazing upon the Salween river in Nu Jiang valley, at 2815k km long it is one of the largest flowing rivers in the world. Originated from the glaciers within the Quinghai mountain in Tibet, Salween/ Nu Jiang runs through Yunnan, Myanmar and Thailand. Pushing a fantastic 4876 cube meters of water per second it is not without occasional tantrums of rapids and backflow. Cascading waterfalls supplying its ever increasing girth and the dramatic green walls make this one of the most beautiful and dramatic images nature has ever offered.

Neighboured by the Mekong and Yangtze rivers UNESCO declared the area a heritage site (providing that the Chinese do not build the proposed hydro dams), so far we only have the mighty Yangtze left to view. UNESCO claim that the Nu Jiang basin 'may be the most biologically diverse temperate ecosystem in the world', and that is preety sweet considering that so far we are the only westerners we cans ee visiting the area.

Lets have a quick look at our rickety bus, theres a man with unknown amounts of phlegm, after almost religiously announcing its presence he sometimes leans accross his wife to expel the devil from the window and on others clumps it on the floor (move your bags ladies and gents) oh but graciously rubs his shoe in to keep it from rolling. Theres also a young Chinese couple on board travelling with their beloved -and very well behaved- puppy. They tear apart sunflower seeds and feed it bottled water from the lid, thats before I mention the doggy hammock.

It is a bumpy ride, you can see why they would give us the battered vehicle for this journey, and just when you think you have once and for all completely escaped the devastation of mass constuction there it is again, nestled against the hillside opposite the mighty river. I would say that we hurried on past but the road, in contradition to the style of new buildings across the way were in neglect and one by one the buses, motorbikes (brave souls) and vans slipped their way to stonier and better gripping paths. The poor road conditions eventually do slow the passage of people, travellers and developers and for that I am grateful. Traditionally the river and trodden walking tracks were the only link between the agricultural indigenous tribes and to this day, thankfully, the state of the roads in the far north shows that construction is not yet a concept. We have finally found untouched China and it has been worth every bruise I have on my hip from bouncing like a yoyo on the back seat and the tiredness felt from a night squatting.

Ten minutes for lunch, we grab some local fast food, a unique Yunnan dish of freshly home made soft pasta. What joy was to be had when Mr and Mrs phlegm join us and slurp their way through their soupy meal, well if you cant beat em join em and Ill admit it is easier to eat when your sucking viciously at your noodles no matter if it is noisy it is practical. Prue may have been the only one alarmed at the table, I am one of the Chinese now. Actually when it comes to table manners, I have heard horror stories concerinng the mess that the chinese leave behind after a meal. Once while travelling in Sumatra one born and bred restaurant owner in LAKE ….. could not help but screw up her face when she spat out her dislike of the tourist season for the 'people of CHI-NA!' thanks to the amount of clearing she had to do in order to make the place hospitable for further guests. Yes the Chinese do slurp and burp but imagine how rude it is for them to not hear you appreciate your food. Also, try eating from several dishes, leaning over to take a chopstick full of that, a ladle of this and not dribble something along the way. The meal is a social event based around a huge rotating table where everyone has access, just because we westerners have our territorial plate within which even the gravy must know its boundary it doesn't mean everyone has to, and besides alls well if you cover your tables with plastic. It must be believed that the art of chopsticks is as tough as that of knife and fork, and I sincerely hope that both cultures allow room for error with one anothers utensils, especially when you see the mess that we make with the soups.

Back on route there's one more treat in store for us, a road block. Correction, a 5 hour road block. Hmmm add another 50% on a 10 hour journey But we didn't know it was going to be this long until the engines started up again. So to pass hour by hour we took a walk 3 times in the same direction trying to see how beau the scenery was after such little sleep the night before; We tried, and I mean really tried, to use the public toilets but even through the thick layer of tigerbalm (my own invention to combat bad smells) the smell stung us before we had reached the entrance and the sight of the amount of s*** and open sanitary -blah blah blah fingers in ears- underfoot actually meant that the neighbouring pigsty (and I mean we squatted amongst pig s***, black hairy pigs and roaming chickens) to be the far more pleasant alternative to take a pee. For a develpoed country of this magnitude I do not understand this sanitary system sometimes; Avoided the leering look of a greasy haired man who spent 20 minutes tracking us for a mere 1 Yuan (we do not respond this); and bored ourselves stupid trying to prise open every sunflower seed from the handful given to us by Mrs plegm We should have eaten them on the bus like everyone else and completed the 'bottom of a bird cage' look that the bus was striving for. Finally we resorted to films (our necks sore from head bobbing in that chicken like way people when trying to sleep on a bus) before an excited rush of colour meant that people were pressing back into their vehicles to take off once more. We, however, had to wait just a little longer for the drunks to get their asses out of the pub, the few seconds delay seemed to seriously affect the driver who decided the best way to play catch up was to beep more and brake less.

You know when you meet someone who not only thinks that every single thing is great but also has the limitation of a singular word for description, thats what happened when we briefly stopped in Gongshan 1 ½ hours away from our destination and 2 American bikers on an epic adventure boarded our bus. Intending to cycle the whole way along the Nu Jiang river and find it AWESOME at every turn is quite a feat, but they are well capable of achieving it. The moon had fully risen by now and despite being awesome it did mean that as the road worsened we could eerily see the sparkle of the water in the deep gulf below as we continued speeding, along the way were some awesome yet terrifying spring crossings, and we also got to stare down into the awesome first bend of the river thanks to our new travel companion, the picture of which evoked this whole detour... except that we seemed to see it a whopping 3 awesome times. It was also awesome that we passed through the ticket booths for free (access to the village is a mildly steep 100 yuan, nearly 20 dollars).

Exhausted would describe our bodies as we dismounted the bus in Bingzhongluo at 10pm, but in the way that China does at that moment when you start to turn against it, the sight of the awesomely small town revived me. We have reached simple, unruined civilisation, what a joy and what a feat! We follw father and son across the way to a simple hotel where the price is pretty steep. Despite the gripes that were made in our direction for being stingy with our budgets we decide to turn ourselves back into the night when the manager appears and turns a 180 room into an 80 one for us all... what a marvellous outcome, oh and by the way your welcome boys. Thus we deposit our beastly bags in Bu Jiang Hotel, find a barbeque man across the way who grilled us delicious spicy tofu and potatos and high five to a tough but definitely awesome day.