The curse of the travel bug is sometimes, well, more travel. We had an excellent deal on accommodation and figured we could keep our selves busy in Dubrovnik for 10 days... but the lure of a couple of countries right next door seduced us. Today we headed off in a small group of 6 to visit Montenegro (literally 'Black Mountain'), beginning with a scenic drive around the Bay of Kotor and with stops in the walled city of Kotor, a quick look at the island of Sveti Stefan and a final stop in Budva for lunch and to visit the walled Old Town (in this part of Europe in particular - good fences made for good neighbours - or at least kept the rampaging hordes out as often as possible).

Before we officially left Croatia however we were treated to some excellent general knowledge from our exceedingly knowledgable and funny guide. Croatia has 1246 islands - it's not up there with 7000+ in the Philippines - but certainly more than we realised. Driving out of Dubrovnik along the coast we saw Lokrum island - closed for winter but a very popular spot to escape the heat of summer. It's even cursed! Apparently. The monks who once lived there were kicked out and they said that anyone who spends a night there will come to grief. The family that did the kicking suffered 5 unexplained deaths and the curse is even wider... Archduke Ferdinand (who's murder kicked off WWI) was killed just a week before he and his wife were due to holiday on the island. Other islands of interest? The quarantine islands. Back in 1377 when the plague was ravaging Europe, sailors wishing to enter the city of Dubrovnik had to spend 30 days on the island, eventually stretched to 40 (hence the name quarantine - coming from the French for 40). Soon after we passed the local hydro plant that provides Dubrovnik with its electricity. Did you know that Croatia had the second hydro plant in the world (think Tesla and electricity). The name Dubrovnik comes from Dubrava - or Oak Trees - the area used to be covered in them but due to many and varied forest fires, they only have a couple now (of course the risk of tourists/camp fires and forest fires on Lokrum is the real reason no one can stay on the reserve overnight, the curse is more interesting). Finally (and relevant as James has had several days of shocking headaches in Dubrovnik) - it's the weather you see! It has been known for hundreds of years that when the warm south wind comes down from Italy, the air pressure changes drastically. In the old days it meant no political decisions could be made until the wind changed - and lesser punishments were meted out for crimes committed during the warm winds. The cold North wind is due back the day we fly out - but thankfully only effects flights landing in Dubrovnik. See - even in real life, Dubrovnik sounds like an episode of Game of Thrones.

Well after the potted history lesson we were still a short while from the Montenegrin border and it was joke time. It's not often guides know or can tell good jokes - but here's a selection. There's a car called the Yugo - still many getting around - very popular during Yugoslavian times... What do you find on the last two pages of the Yugo owner's manual?... The Bus Schedule! Why does the Yugo have a heater for it's back window?... To keep your hands warm when you're pushing it in winter. Aside from cars, in any part of the world there will always be jokes about the neighbours. In this part of the world, from a Croatian perspective, the stereotypes are 'Montenegrins are lazy' and 'Bosnians are stupid'. So... What's the Montenegrin record for the 100 metre dash? 56 metres. If a Bosnian and a Montenegrin at competing in the 100 metre dash who will win? No one... Montenegrin stopped at the 56 m point and the Bosnian got lost. Montenegro even has postcards about their own perceived laziness... I told a couple of my own jokes and the guide said I could be a stand up comedian... As we'd just entered Montenegro I replied I'd actually have to be a sit-down comedian...

First thing we noticed in Montenegro once the group stopped laughing? The prices! Wow! A few days in Dubronik and everywhere appears cheap, but this really was. We stopped at an expensive looking water side coffee shop / restaurant - only €1.50 for a cappucino - with table service! and a view! Unfortunately this part of the world is about 30 years behind the rest with regard to indoor smoking, health risks etc - and it was teeming down outside - so we had our coffees at the far end of the restaurant away from as many tables as possible. Due to humanity's flocking instinct (it's real... google it), we'd barely finsihed the coffees when some ardent smoker followed us to the cleaner end of the joint and lit up. Heaven for smokers... hell for the rest of us.

We were grateful for the fresh air outside and the hit the road for the drive around the bay and it's 2 quaint islands - one man made (St Mary was involved - and a lot of rocks) and one natural. Before we knew it we reached the walled town of Kotor. It was actually reminiscent of the Great Wall of China. The town felt vulnerable to attack from over the mountains behind it - so the wall scaled the mountains. It's possible to climb parts of it - but very slippery in the rain - so we limited oursleves to looking from a distance. The town it self was very pretty and almost empty - of tourists at least. It's another town that's a big fans of cats - they were everywhere - many shops have donation jars to help feed them (though fixing them would probably work better). Pretty sure it was 'free cat with every fridge magnet' in one shop we went into. The local tour guide who showed us around half of the old town would have made an excellent vacuum cleaner - she simply sucked the life out of a stunning historical spot (And this is the 'a' palace. And this is the 'b' palace and this is a city gate and this is a church but it's closed and next we're going to another church that is closed...) Probably a lovely person. She would want to be. Having finished our 30 minute city tour we hived off on our own for a fossick about and saw the other half of the town and even climbed the tiniest bit of the walls for a nice view over the marina and bay. The prices of food in Montenegro continued to impressed and we snaffled some polenta, a burek and a chocolate muffin for afters... less than €2. (After the day trip we had a squiz at AirBnB - entire apartments in Kotor for €10/night at this time of year - very economical indeed!) Having escaped Kotor without adopting a cat we motored on to a look out point to see the (now) private island of St Stephen (Sveti Stefan). It's owned by a Russian oligarch and the private resort on the island starts at over €1000/night. It's a wonder we could afford to look at it (it's today's featured picture). Our final stop was coming up - Budva. Apparently a huge party town during the season, it was, not surprisingly fairly quiet on a gray rainy day. We considered a seafront seafood restaurant for lunch - but they broke the golden rule and had their menu in more than 5 languages (sure sign of a tourist trap). Instead we hoofed towards the old town of Budva (more walls!) and found a Chinese restaurant - yay!!!! vegetables! 'Tis the curse of travelling on a budget (possibly even without a budget, who knows) but there never seem to be enough veges around. Let alone Chinese restaurants. We had a veritable feast - eating only half, and took the rest home for dinner - €22 for lunch with drinks - €22 for lunch with drinks and dinner as well... PRICELESS! Mastercard would be so happy. We told our guide about it later and he said it wasn't a good Chinese restaurant - we were flabbergasted? Who had spread such a vicious rumour to him? Chinese people apparently. We told him that actually made sense - food in China completely different from one end of the country to the other and different again to 'genuine, westernised Chinese food'. We also saaid he should feel entirely safe sending any Aussies, Kiwis, Americans, Canadians or Brits to the Hong Kong Cineski Restoran... it was pretty good indeed. Certainly the best Chinese food we tasted in Montenegro. We took a post-lunch stroll around Budva's old town, but it turns out the owners of most of the shops prefer coffee, lunch, nattering (elsewhere) to actually running their businesses on the off chance somebody wants to buy something. Many shops were shut between 12 noon and 4 pm. Which would be understandable in the middle of a blazingly hot summer... but in the middle of winter? Anyway - obviously good for the wallet. The weather was deteriorating by this point and we were getting blown to bits when we had a brief walk to the absolute waterfront - waves were crashing, wind was howling and the rain was coming down - and on that note it was back to the car for the long drive back to Dubrovnik - broken up by a short but effective ferry ride across the bay and many more jokes... particularly about Montenegrins not being in business school on the day they talked about opening hours. Probably didn't get back until 6 pm or so - and entered Dubrovnik via the Buze gate - (one should certainly never leave by it... easy 300 steps or so up from the main street) - but great to walk down and the rain had given up by the time we reached our Old Town apartment for a well deserved 'night in'.

(Separately - we learned online yesterday that people from Bosnia are Bosniaks - we quizzed our guide on this as we'd been talking about Bosnians... apparently only Muslims in Bosnia are Bosniaks... Which is lucky - because I was about to query why Albanians aren't called Albaniacs... (funnily enough, seems to be what the Croatian border guards think... on the drive back we got to stay in the people-mover and hand the passports through the window... the coach load of Albaniacs had to get out of the coach and sit in the cold while individual passports were matched to faces... That whole reputation as white slave traders just can't be shaken it seems.)