Hola Amigos,

 

Through the hostel I was staying in in San Diego I booked an excursion into Tijuana, Mexico. The border into Mexico was a turn-style with nobody of authority there. The first thing I saw was all the tack that I had avoided for 9 months in Latin America, and than something I never expected to see. Two donkey’s painted to look like Zebras! There was a lot of tourists getting their pictures taken with the “Zonkeys”, I was disgusted by it and the sickos that wanted their picture taken with some poor animal. So I decided to take advantage of Tijuana’s next best know attraction Tequila and Beer!

 

For reasons of science myself and an Aussie guy decided we should get a photo of ourselves with every beer we had. This was a good idea until we tried it in a less than gentlemen gentlemen’s club. We decided to have only two beers there and move on. Our next destination was an off licence that sold 96% alcohol. We all got a free shot and I was volunteered to try it first. Due to the very high alcohol content it near enough just evaporated on my tongue. I was expecting some burn but nothing came, that was until I tired to speak and noticed that I had no voice! The guys was trying to sell us bottles of this stuff but said that we would get it taken off us at the border so he could put in another bottle that they had made up with a 40% label on it. I declined on offer on the grounds of sanity.

 

After a few more hours of drinking beer and doing tequila hits, I was a little more jolly. At this point I should point out that a true drinker does not go from sober to drunk there are many stages in between and therefore the novice should not assume that I was drunk at this point – that was to come later. Also, the experienced drinker will be able to explain that there is also further stages after drunk, paralytic being just one of them.

 

The process of drinking a shot of tequila involved the consumer and the loud annoying whistle blowing tequila man. He would stand behind you using his whistle as some primitive form of communication and bend your head band and than pour some tequila into your month and bang you on the back of the head to insure you don’t enjoy the experience. As the night wears on they become more tactical in their dispensing of tequila! When they are pouring tequila into your mouth they grab your beer, shake it and spray the bloody stuff into your mouth and than finish you off by hitting you in the back of the head to make the swallowing process even more difficult. Again, we felt that the science field would be interested in our results and had to par take in this process many times.

 On the way back to the border I was quite merry and about one step away from drunk. I decided this was the time when true men made their make and so I went back to our friend at the off licence and spent the last of my money of a bottle of their cheapest Tequila. This was the sign of pure genius, I would not be able to be declared drunk if I by passed this stage at great speed to positively hammered. The queue back to the States took about two hours but only a second in the universe of the truly alcohol induced traveller. By the time I had crossed the border I had offered a drink to quite a few fellow AIT’s and even the immigration guys who from hazy memories and next

day stories took it very well. One the tram back into San Diego I polished off the bottle and from the many stories I encountered the next day I was the life and soul of the tram getting everyone to pose together for one picture. However, I did not take it with my camera it was the camera of some couple that just wanted a photo of them. I was reassured that everyone enjoyed my company and the couple thought it was all great.

 

From the stories of my good deeds a group of English guys decided that I would make a good addition to their drinking game on my last night in the US and so once again I edged closer and closer to drunkenness!

 Until next time, Em