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Dan and Lu's Travels
Checked out and hung around in the lounge area for hours. I was on the internet when dough boy came in and startd telling me about the guy in room 3 who apparantly hadn't been paying on time, and one day doughboy had had to put in $15 of his own money t get his boss off his back. He lost his house and everything in Katrina and his job is all he has - now his boss has told him to go home today and not come back because of this whole situation. So, in comes the guy from room 3 who turns out to be posh boy (sorry for all the nicknames but its more fun that way!) This guy is a school teacher, our age, teaching at private school in north Yorkshire and he speaks very poooosh. We'd met him a few days ago and he seemed nice enough but he acted like a patronising... teacher basically to doughboy. It went on for ages, db shouting that he wanted him to leave and pb saying "well, if you'd just let me make a counter point.." (oh please). Darren came along and sorted it out and pb apologised.
We got a lift to the station about 3.30pm. Bus at 4.30 - and yet again it was a wierd one. So, cue the notes I made while actually on the bus:
The seat to the left and slightly in front is occupied by someone who I swear looks no older than 9 but is maybe 17. I didn't think people actualy looked like this in real life - he's more cartoon character than anything else. His father must have been the inspiration for Bart Simpson. Hopefully he'll wear himself out soon, I've not seen anyone so excitable to be on a bus since the school trip to Alton Towers in fourth year. He's wearing a yellow polo shirt and black baseball cap and his top lip kind of stretches out like a disc over his goofy teeth. He's in the process of asking random people where they're going.
The couple sat in front, if they are a couple, are definitely not the usual types you get on Greyhound - although they are starnge enough. He has the hairstyle of a 12 year old at private school, and the face. I think he had something attached to his face before because the woman had her tweezers out and was trying to pull it while he sat there patiently. She looks like a reject from Blossom, with a shapeless faux hippy (more C&A) dress, 80s black felt hat, black mayry janes with white ankle socks, frizzy hair and glasses. They are both reading architecture books and she's fussing about the seat being dirty.
Every so often the drunk guy behind us contributed something to the atmosphere by repeating the last word of someone's sentence.
There are two black ladies sat next to us who are dressed in primary colours and looking like they are trying to avoid a conversation with Mr Pissed and Bart.
Bart began asking us questions a while later about England which included "Do you have lawyers in England?" and "Do you get wine over there?" (he was asking ME if we have wine in England!) He also said we steal their names (i.e. Manchester....) He was intrigued by Kings and Queens and didn't understand why we have a Queen but not a King, and more bizarrely, why we have 'Burger King' but no actual King, and a real Queen but not 'Dairy Queen'........ then he got onto the subject of princes ("how can I become a prince?"). He asked us to name a prince in England, and some random guy piped up "Why don't you think about for yourself", then the drunk guy shouted "work it out, it begins with a D" ..... no idea who he was thinking of....
He then asked us if we got the bus to America from England... at this point we began to concentrate on ignoring him.
Driving out of New Orleans the Mississippi river stretches out on either side of the endless bridge, all you can see is water and other bridges. Its like a sea.
We were driving east, in parts along the Gulf coast. As we got to Biloxi, Mississippi, the surroundings seemed to flatten out, and I began to realise that it was damage from the hurricane last year. There were piers jutting out onto the still water with no floors to them, all the boards having been ripped up. Big signs which used to stand outside fast food restaurants were still there, but the restaurants just aren't there anymore, all that's left of them a flat slab of concrete and the redundant sign. An MGM casino is due to open in 28 days, the Hard Rock casino is still being rebuilt. The guidebook says the place is full of life and business but it was published in 2004. Very sobering.
The journey continued to be tedious, annoying and infuriating in equal parts. We parted ways with Bart Simpson somewhere in Alabamha, when we changed buses. He told us that he'd killed our king and that he was now king....
Had a horrendous 4 hour wait in a very air conditioned bus station before boarding the next one.
We arrived in Nashville and spent ages trying to find a cheap place to stay and a way to get there. Walking to a local bus stop, the location of which you are guessing, in 1091 degree humidity and burning sun with loads of bags is n't fun...
We got to the Executive Inn after 24 hours of travelling, and I can quite safely say that there's nothing executive about it. This motel is the kind of place that murderers or people wjo are generally heading for the Mexican border to escape soemone or something, stay in films. And, Judging by the other residents, in real life too.
Comfortingly, there are 3 locks on the door, although that kind of has the opposite effect of comfort. There is a door knob-shaped hole in the wall... which is nice. Watch any old road movie or crime film to get an idea of the decor.
The most intriguing thing is the phone. It IS a bat phone! It has a red light on top that continuously flashes until you pick up, so we had a lot of childish fun with that one.
We were really tierd after the journey so just watched cable - which is basically just adverts, one of which, honestly, was for gastric bypass surgery to make you thinner.... only in America!
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