Today I woke up to Mitchell telling me he slept in the wrong room. He meant to sleep in my bed but woke up in the morning and was not in room 405. I jumped out of bed and ran up four flights to my room hoping the French guys did not take any of my belongings. Each place I stay, I slide my iPad in my pillow case in case I get robbed. I have to believe that's the last place they'll check.
Once I reached my room, it was locked so had to run back down four flights to retrieve the key from the seedy host who was now upset I didn't stay in my room. I hiked back up the staircase and was nervous my stuff may have got taken. When I opened the door, the room was vacant and all of my things remained in tact.
Now having the entire morning to myself, I hit play on my iPod and listened to Natasha Bedingfield's new album. I had become obsessed with this album. The lyrics of my favorite new song "Weightless" were similar to how I have been operating lately.
The lyrics on the hook are " The sky is the limit and I just want to float. Free as a spirit on a journey of a hope. Cut the strings and let me go- I'm weightless. Millions of balloons tethered to the ground, weight of the world trying to hold us down. Cut the strings and let me go and let me go- I'm weightless."
I've been so wrapped up in my career and my life- and it's a great one. I love and appreciate everything I have but I've become so overwhelmed worrying about getting caught up. I have experienced so many beautiful things in my new life in California. I met Lisa which led to the spider web effect of meeting the greatest gift- friendships. I have no idea what my life would be like when I arrived in San Diego without meeting these amazing people. They adopted into their group with open arms. They have truly confirmed that the feeling planted inside me to move to California was all for a reason. All of the people in this circle of friends welcomed me and accepted me in a way that I am truly grateful for. My job couldn't be going any better. My office is filled with great people that I feel lucky to have met. I had a great relationship with my office in Cleveland and wondered if they would embrace me the same. They make my day when they ask me about my weekend, my dating life and the random funny things that occur on a daily basis in my life. I got lucky with them. They get me- it's not often you can change branches and find people who you enjoy coming into every morning. With the combination of my team and my goals, on paper it's great. I achieved every goal and am on the path to a great career. But I had this undeniable feeling to escape it all. While it is the greatest gift, this has been one of the most stressful times in my career. More responsibility equates to more pressure. I am reached all day by my blackberry and have every hour outlined, and am pulled in every direction on a daily basis. I feel like at times I have to pretend I'm fearless when secretly I am not. I have to figure out a solution when I've not encountered one like it yet. Sometimes I come home and cannot believe I survived today. Other days I come home and feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Its a trade off but it brings me to the point of this trip. I needed to be removed from work. I needed to feel again what it was to be me. The me that did not have a career tied to my name. I needed to experience days without structure again. I needed to remember what it's like to not have my guard up all the time. At work, I can't expose my true self too often in fear HR contradicts my role as a role model or mentor. I like to be goofy, laugh and just be me. In this role I worry that I'm starting to lose myself in being more much reserved and holding back my true personality. Its not that extreme, I'm still very much myself but in the corporate world there are always rules and restrictions and I recognize that it's taken an effect on me. Is it fixable? Absolutely, most of the pressure I experience is what I've placed on myself anyway. I just knew I needed to be removed for two weeks, get back to the basics of myself and come back to work refreshed and with a better understanding of who I am.
The reason why I relate to this song so much is because the weight of the world, my career, my life-as fantastic as it all is, it's weighing me down. I do believe the sky is the limit. I entered this trip following this motto. I had no agenda and have already met so many people, found a whole new level of courage and found my true limitless personality again. I've always believed that no idea, no dream is out of reach. This trip is proving that. On this trip, you can decide at the very last minute if you want to hop on a train to Venice, take a tour of the an ancient city or eat an authentic pizza in Naples. There are no rules, no limitations and worries.
After I showered, which was the most awful experience. The shower head was not connected to the wall, there was a hand held on the side, so trying to wash my hair with one hand holding the shower head and the other washing was a bit of a challenge. I cracked up in the shower wishing I had another person in there with me to help me with this daunting task.
The boys popped up to my room to see if I was ready to head to the coliseum. I couldn't believe. I was going to The Coliseum in Rome today. What a dream.
The three of us walked down the streets through Rome and I was in love with the city. It reminded me a lot of Paris. It was a classy city with trees and beautiful shops, apartments and restaurants lining the streets. Every building had tall archways that opened into a large foyer with marble floors. It was a stunning place. The boys were talking the whole way but I was sipping my cappuccino and admiring the streets of Rome. We stopped in the Santa Maria Cathedral and was in awe at the detail in the church. Every arch, every panel, every painting was so magnificent that I was completely in a trance. It was a beautiful cathedral.
We stopped at a sandwich shop and picked up a Panini. The flavors, like anything I ate in Italy were incredible. I would miss the food in Italy so much when I left. Hopefully Spain would prove me wrong.
One thing I noticed on a daily basis here is how everyone dresses in Italy. Everyone is dressed to impress from head to toe. They put great detail in their choice in clothing, lots of dresses but more importantly, lots of jewelry. I admired the fashion in Italy and will take back a lot of ideas from just walking around for a week.
We turned the corner and I saw my first glimpse of the coliseum. It was a privilege to see. I know this a sight that not everyone will get the opportunity to experience. The closer we got the more you could see how additional pieces were seconds from crumbling off the building. We waited in line for over an hour while street vendors came by every other minute selling jewelry, sunglasses, magnets. We talked more in line about Choony, they had met her in Florence as well. I had brought up a time when her and I got lost in translation. I had told her that the Russian girl we met in our hostel was not my cup of tea. She looked at me funny and asked for me to explain.
I asked the guys if they were talking to someone from another country and they didn't know the meaning behind a saying you used, how would you describe it. They said they would tell Chonny it was just something we use to describe something we do not particularly care for. I agreed, but told them that that was my first reply to Chonny's question as well. Only, that doesn't fully explain it. Chonny needed it to be broken down one step further on the actual "why" we choose to describe something we don't particularly like as tea. This stumped the boys who knew all. They said to tell Choony "I actually don't know why its called a cup of tea, its just something I was told a long time ago so use it to describe things I don't like."
It was in interesting point. Sometimes we use sayings and forget the actual meaning behind them. Sometimes we get so comfortable on not having to go back to the basics that we start to lose the true meaning behind what sayings are intended to convey. What I ended up telling Choony was that everyone prefers the tea a particular way. Some like chamomile, some like green, some like one sugar some may totally dislike sugar in their tea all together. Everyone has their preference so when there is a variety to choose from, if you're describing something you dislike, you can say "it's just not my cup of tea" her response: I like coffee, can you say it's just not my cup of coffee?
That question- I don't know.
I don't think I've ever actually had to describe to someone something the basics which was another fun thing on my trip to learn. There are things you do here in Europe where you have to use parts of your brain that you don't have a need for in the states. Buying tokens in a bar from a vending machine in order to buy a beer. Having to piece together languages to use the wash room. Trying to wash and dry your hands on the train sounds so simple, but is actually different. We've become robots when we use the bathroom in the states where we know exactly where to place our hands in order for the automatic soap dispenser to release soap in our hands. Then we place our hands under the Dyson hand dryer. Here the set up is a bit different and you can learn in a few seconds, but it's interesting the first time you go to use it and you laugh at how they choice to arrange their hand washing process.
After we waited in line for over an hour, played eye spy and twenty questions, all things I hadn't done in ages...we made it into the interior of the coliseum. The first glimpse from the street was stunning. The first view walking up through the tunnel was incredible. The conversations Mitch and Darragh were having became a fuzzy background noise. I wasn't listening to their story about Venice anymore, I was captivated by the structure, the view, how much larger it was in person. I walked around the entire coliseum several times and never knew how much I would truly enjoy it. Normally I get bored easily. Not here. You get lifted up in this fantasy world while you're walking around. Your brain imagines what it was like when the Romans were lining up every seat to create a full house for the games.
We stayed in the coliseum for hours walking through every inch of the building. Every place I visited became my new favorite place, and this easily stole first place.
When we left, I grew really tired and wanted to check into my hostel. The guys gave me their spare map and showed me the best route to take back to the center of Rome.
I walked down the streets and loved that I was so happy Rome had proven to be so unbelievable. I was glad it was nothing like Naples and everything that I had dreamt it would be.
I reached my hostel and silently thanked Becca once more. She did a fantastic job selecting hostels for me. This place was called the Alessandro Palace and it truly was. The foyer had marble floors leading to the reception check in counter. It had a sleek bar, a roof top terrace and very nice large bedrooms with key cards. No boys in my room and no seedy hosts.
I met my room mates and they were from Chile, Germany and California. Lisa, was from Malibu and was going through a divorce and wanted to take this trip to rediscover herself again. I admired her and her story. We had gone down to the bar and talked about her life and her travel plans for the next two months. She is flying to Barcelona next week as well, we made plans to stay in the same hostel.
After a cocktail with Lisa, I wandered down the street in search for pizza. I have yet to grow tired of it and absolutely will miss the ability to just walk out your door and pick from hundreds of places to choose from. I found a pizzeria and ordered a mozzarella and basil pizza and beer using the Italian language. As I walked out the door and shouted Ciao, I wished this trip didn't have an ending. I was loving every second of this fantasy life style. The walk anywhere, do anything atmosphere. I met back up with my room mates in the bar and ate my dinner while discussing everyone's plans for the week. Here, everyone is on the same track. They are on the traveling high as well. They talk about what train they're taking next and what city they just left. We all went out to the streets and drank with the new crowd that surrounded us. We now had people from Brazil, Canada and Australia who joined our group. It's so bizarre to be in all the different company and realize how similar we are all. I headed to bed early, they were all going to the club but I had quite the night last night so decided to take it easy and rest up for tomorrow. The Aussies sent me a message on Facebook to meet them in the morning to tour The Vatican.