Early start from Bangkok and I was torn between fast trains with a dodgy ankle or a taxi that could be stuck in traffic for ages.
I decided to suck it up and be a man so threw on my rucksack and was in agony before I even turned the first corner.
Anyhow I made it on time to Bangkok airport and flew via Kua Lumpur to Denpasar. I had been warned that Kuta was cheap rowdy and full of surfers, but decided to stay as it was close to the airport and my flight got in a little late.
Usual story with the taxis, I used the official airport taxis so as not to get ripped off, but the office had not given me the change, and said the driver would give it to me.
I knew I was on for a hiding as soon as he started offering me ladies, drugs and telling me how bad the area where my hotel was and that he could take me elsewhere. Suprise surprise he had no change when we pulled up.
I said no problem I will get the hotel to change it and then miraculously he found a few bills. Not all mind but it was under a quid and I was tired and sweaty so he got away with it.
Hotel was more a hostel and on a busy street, but I had booked a cheap room so thought beggars cant be chosers, and then the story of this trip happened yet again, I got the crappest room in the hotel, it was like a prison cell, not even a window.
I asked to pay more for a better room but they told me they were full.
Luckily the owner was arguing with some French smelly hairy armpitted travellers (no reflection on the French I might add, they just happened to be French) in reception and after he used the F word to tell them to go, he looked over at me scowling and asked what my problem was.
By the way he was a big Scottish bloke.
He was fine though when I admitted I had been a cheap charlie, and he did me a good deal on his other place nearer to the beach.
So hotel sorted, I ventured out in to the hell hole that is Kuta.
Roads not big enough for bikes with cars trying to go down them, pushy shop owners and pissed up Ozzies.
It was like india only minus the cows.
At least the beer was cheap, so I bought some super size Bintangs and decided to retire to my balcony.
Not sure what kept me awake most, the barking dog next door, upstairs having a party or the cockerel that naturally started at dawn.
Anyhow new day, and had breakfast with some swedish girls telling me how they had been robbed, and then another guy who teaches english there chipped in and said how dangerous it was just going to an atm and only use blue taxis. But dont worry, any problems the hotel keeps a gun.
Hmm, not exactly the paradise I had anticipated.
Well I had a full day so I rented a bike and decided I would not need my phone with maps as emergency back up and spent the next three hours entirely lost in the maze of streets dodging cars and dogs and potholes.
Finally found my way back and by then I had had enough, but thought perhaps have a beer on the beautiful sandy beach........
It was like a plastic recycling plant with a bit of sand on top, it was disgusting.
So I decided me and Kuta were done, took a photo of the beach to prove I was there and headed to the Bintang shop.
To sum up Kuta, jump in your car, put a hosepipe through the window and get a few people you dont really like to come and join you.