DAY THE SECOND WHICH I SHALL ATTEMPT AND PROBABLY FAIL TO RECOUNT MORE CONCISELY THAN THE PREVIOUS DAY.

The substandard and strikingly mediocre morning of hotel problems, food shortages, being stalked by the bedouins and trying to meet up with Everitte was more than made up for by the rest of the day's activities. It was honestly one of the best half days I have ever had.

We entered Petra late lunchtime. For whatever reason, probably because all the tourists try to spend the entire day at Petra, the walk down to the Treasury was a lot less busy and actually cooler. I took pleasure in eating a chocolate ice cream on the way down and still snap happy I took more photos of rocks which I must say don’t look nearly as impressive on camera as they do in real life. We also did some jumping photos as our hands were held by the Jordanian soldier who, presumably for reasons of dignity and street cred refused to actually jump with us.

Our only thing on our itinerary that day was to walk to the monastery on the other side of Petra which was good as you had to walk through the rest of the stuff to get there. Thus Everitte saw most of what we saw yesterday but he was less exhausted. Less exhausted is good.

The monastery and the views from up that way were the absolute highlight of Petra nd should NEVER be missed. My advice would be that you could do Petra in a day if you wanted, just pace yourself and do not get too stressed. The high place walk could be done in the morning if you really wanted, with the monastery left till late afternoon, which is what we now did. At 3pm as we headed up, most people were heading down for some reason. The walk was mainly shaded, and though steep and toturous, not nearly as bad as the walk yesterday in the blazing sunshine. All the way up we were met by kohl eyed Johnny Depp lookalikes and goats, many goats. We also did a lot of climbing on pointless bits of rock. Everitte descended a very steep gorge half way up while we munched on bananas. He then re-emerged sporting a lovely petra hat, then decided it was not as great as all that (khaki again) and cast it back down the chasm whence it had come. At the monastery we jumped and did acrobatics with a random group of Palestinians who decided they liked our style and joined in with the merrity and jolliment. When they left we headed up to where a myriad of different paths and signs led to various views named things like “the end of the world” and “the great canyon”. The strange thing was, you honestly couldn’t see what an incredible view it was until you were right upon it, but it was worth the whole 21JD of the day ticket to just see that view.

We stayed up there beyond the monastery more or less completely alone except for a couple of whistle playing bedouin and a puppy called basha who took a liking to my red aladdin trousers. For about two hours we sat, took photos, climbed many rocks, (threw them down the mountain in the case of the boys) and all in all had a fantastical time. Later on as the sun began to fade the biblical landscape made for a spectacular sunset. There is honestly nothing better to do in Petra than watch the sun set from up there.

The only problem with that is, of course, that you are supposed to be out of Petra by sunset which we conveniently managed to mis-time. We were so carried away that we stayed a little too long on top of the mountains and then had to hurry as fast as we could to get out. Our success was limited and it is at this point that I must say two huge thankyous to a few people who made sure we didn’t perish on our dangerous route down. The bedouins up there watched us hurry off the mountain and down the first part of the path with faint amusement and a friendly invitation to stay and camp with them. Although any other time I would have said yes (with two boys we now looked like two couples) we were rather hungry and were planning to head off early the next day so we kept going in a little more haste as the light was fading a lot faster than we had anticipated. After a little while, two of them appeared on donkeys playing Hotel California out of some mystery speakers and kept us company on the path down. They said how much they loved Bob Marley, more than their dead mothers (we didn’t have the heart to tell them the true artists of Hotel California) and we chatted to them whilst trying not to fall to our deaths in the dark. I went barefoot which let me have a little more grip than flip flops or even trainers. No shoes help with the treacherous combination of sand and smooth rockface. The most amusing thing they said also said a lot about the double standards of the bedouin. They said how much freer they were than any other people to enjoy life in the open air, and had a lifestyle where they could do what they wanted when they wanted. Upon Everitte’s enquiry, prompted by India, about whether women also had this wonderful life, one of them said perfectly nonchalantly, “Oh no no no, the women have no freedom at all. But the men, the men!”

Once at the bottom and bruised and slightly on edge but still very much alive, we commenced walking through Petra. We thanked our guides down who blithely waved us goodbye as they headed home. It was a longer journey that I remembered to get back and it probably would have taken about double the time if our second life-saver hadn’t at that moment appeared. Lazar, a headlight brandishing Macedonian-Swiss photographer working in Ramallah and visiting Jordan on a short break before re-applying for his Israeli visa materialised as if out of nowhere and came with us through the brooding Petra mountains. It was something special to walk in pitch black with nothing but the rocks, and the stars and another dog who like my trousers and the banana skins I was still carrying around. We eventually reached the treasury and were surprised to find people there, including the head of security. We were in trouble, a lot of trouble. He pointed out to us, very unimpressed at our motley crew,that the tickets say on the back to be out of Petra by sunset. To quote him directly, “You are unlawful here.” Our only response was to apologise and explain that we got a little lost on the mountains. For a moment I was worried we’d be arrested or something, because he really was not happy. I think, talking to Lazar, it was probably that he thought we were trying to camp in Petra, which is of course strictly prohibited, or that we were trying to see Petra At Night for free. Amusingly, it was neither and eventually he gave us 15 minutes to get out of Petra before he called security.

What followed was a very brisk, surreal and serene walk back up through the siq, again in the dark with not a soul in sight except for the men who were lighting the bags of candles for Petra At Night. It was so atmospheric to see the path in candlelight even though we were walking very fast indeed as we realised that 15 minutes really wasn’t enough time to get out. We were anticipating trouble at the entrance, but as it turned out we walked straight through watch only by tourists, slightly perplexed as to what exactly we were doing there. Exhausted, slightly shaky from fatigue and hunger with a little tinge of fear, we collapsed just outside Petra and realised that our adventure had been reckless, stupid and potentially dangerous. We also realised that it could have been made worse had we not been guided back by the bedouins and Lazar. We also concluded that it was completely worth it.

A celebratory supper was had at the highly recommended oriental restaurant just up the road from Petra where I had a bedouin speciality with fresh salad, fresh orange juice AND chips. It was beautiful, and very reasonably priced for Petra. We chatted more to Lazar about Disneyland (Palestine), Macedonia and its lack of a minister for tourism and Skopje’s bizarre mix of Japanese and 1960s architecture and then took a taxi together up to Wadi Musa where we visited a sweet shop and bought baklava and I experience my first keneffe. I thought as I ate it, I shouldn’t like this, but I finished it and was strangely satisfied with it. Odd indeed and the perfect end to the day.