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"What we do in life, echoes in eternity"
- Gladiator
On the day when England lost the Ashes to Australia in Perth, twenty two men and women true took to another field to contest some different ashes... The Real Ashes.
Today was the day when the backpackers from The Old Firestation would take on the staff from Rosie O Grady's Pub in a epic battle of good times, cold beers and great cricket.
It began early in the morning with the ceremonial burning of the Ashes. Bruce, the owner of the backpackers, donated his favorite hat, while Tony, General Manager of Rosie's, put in his (allegedly) favorite tie.
Just add Kerosene....
The Ashes were funnelled into an Urn supplied by Vinny (not sure what happened to the previous occupant) to be set onto an engraved trophy base. This would then reside in the premises of the winner until it was contested yet again.
Team Rosie's arrived bright and early in XXXX Yellow, having stolen promotional T-shirts from the pub. The Firestation team dressed in their trademark, sombre black and arrived, I believe, 16 to a van.
We couldn't get the WACA, as it was being used by two other cricket teams, so we opted for the park by South Beach here in Fremantle. While the WACA is known as being a fast bowler's wet dream, the South Beach ground is more about avoiding the odd dog turd and looking out for the pile of empty beer cans at each wicket.
The rules were pretty straight forward - boundaries at the Umpire's Discretion, no LBW, and batters had to retire at 30 runs, although could come back on if any of the agreed 25 overs were left. Each player had to bowl twice, with the remaining three overs at the captain's discretion.
Rosie O Grady won the toss and opted to bat first... It was a bold call from captain Bowen, choosing to set the pace rather than chase it. A quick photo call later, and the game was on...
Rosie O Grady Vs The Old Firestation Backpackers
Fremantle, 18th December 2006
Attendance: 20,000 (rounded up to the nearest 20,000)
Officials:
Umpire: Mike
Scorer: Alex
Rosie O Grady To Bat First:
Bowen, captain, not out, 30
Johnny, c Mike, b Cheska, 41
Jordan, b Leon, 5
Amee, c Mike, b Mike, 22
Mandi, run out, b Russ, 0
Randa, c Russ, b Janice, 2
Rolphy, c Janice, b Rob, 13
Gavin, b Aaron, 4
Lynn, run out, Russ, 3
Joe, c Janice, b Leon, 5
Kara, c Michael, b Rich, 2
All Out For 127
An impressive innings from the pub staff, with some fine cricket from Bowen and Johnny - it could have gone on even longer, but when Johnny's long strike cleared the boundary only to bounce back in off a tree and into the hands of a fielder, the Umpire chose to call him out. Just for the expression on his face. Also a very impressive turn from Amee, knocking up a solid 22 before delivering the ball into the hands of the bowler.
Gavin and Lynn, sharing with me the pleasure of both living at the Old Firestation and working at Rosie's, remained composed throughout long and drawn out chants of "Judas!" whenever they did anything.
The Firestation's innings began after lunch, which consisted of yet more beers and a bag of chips from the nearby cafe.
The backpackers started well, led by Captain Russ who easily knocked up his first thirty before retiring. Some more solid scoring and supported by every sporting song anyone could think of, they had 68 by the time we had drinks on the field.
Then Rosie's started to take some wickets, and things were getting exciting. Rolphy caught out Donna for a single, pulling Russ back onto the field to lead his team to glory. Partnered with Michael, the surprise star of the day, the two set in to make the handful of runs needed for victory.
With three overs left, The Old Firestation needed four runs to win. Rosie's needed one wicket to win.
Unlike any of the Ashes tests thus far, the excitement was palpable and the tension almost unbearable. Backpacker chants of "Easy!" had dried up and everyone was as close to silent as a massive group of pissed b******s could ever hope to be.
Ant bowled... Michael saw his chance... And walloped it! The crowd were on their feet, the Backpackers opening their mouths to cheer as the ball sailed towards the boundary...
......and into the hands of Michael the Bartender. Michael the Umpire stuck his finger in the air with breezy neutrality.
It was all over. Rosie O Grady had won the first ever Real Ashes Test.
Leon, c Randa, b Joe, 2
Cheska, c Randa, b Ant, 10
Russ, captain, not out, 39
Rob, b Ant, 0
Janice, c Michael, b Michael, 11
Aaron, c Johnny, b Bowen, 14
Pete, c Bowen, b Johnny, 4
Rich, c Randa, b Gavin, 10
Eion, c Gavin, b Blaise, 2
Michael, c Michael, b Ant, 31
Donna, c Rolphy, b Bowen, 1
All out for 124
After much celebrating and commiserating, we adjourned to Rosie O Grady's for an evening of drunken high jinx. At one point I got on stage and gave out some prizes, which was nice, and then at some stage we retired to the Backpackers to carry on the good times into the wee small hours.
Despite the result the Backpackers celebrated the event with style and, cliche or not, great fun was had by all.
The main point agreed upon is that we won't be waiting fifteen months for a rematch.
Great Cricket!
The Prizes:
Most Valued Player (Rosies) - Johnny
Most Valued Player (Firestation) - Michael
Best Catch - Gavin (Rosies)
Worst Catch - Leon (OFS)
Best Lady Batsperson - Janice (OFS)
Best Lady Fielder - Randa (Rosies)
It should also be noted that although there weren't any prizes for them, both captains, Bowen and Russ, exhibited a huge amount of good sportsmanship throughout the day, and it was these two that made it into such an enjoyable event.... even if you didn't realise it at the time...
The Credits:
The Man With The Plan: Me
The Man With The Urn: Vinny
The Man Who Made It Big: Russ
The Lady Who Cleaned Up After Us: Pricilla
The Man Who Got A Cricket Ball In The Knackers, Causing 40 Men To Share His Pain: Russ
The Man Who Kept The Score: Alex
The Pair Who Didn't Mind Being Called Judas All Day: Gavin & Lynn
The Man Who Gave Us His Hat: Bruce
The Man Who Gave Us His Tie: Tony
The Pub That Gave Us Cheap Drinks and Free Food: Rosie O Grady's
Cricket Equipment Supplied By: Rosie O Grady's
The Backpackers That Give Us Everything Else: The Old Firestation
Umpire's Hat Supplied By: Bowen
Manditory Loud Mouthed, Black Eyed, Drunken Englishman: Trevor
Trevor's Wardrobe Supplied By: Burberry
Trevor's Black Eye Supplied By: Steve
Steve's Drinks Supplied By: Me
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