DAY SIX I must put a disclaimer in first of all - I am actually actively encouraging Jasmin to write some of this, but to this point, unfortunately is my verbal diarrhoea you will have to put up with. The feverish hot plate that is Hanoi greeted our weary eyes with an abundance of blistering sunshine and the resultant combination of scintillating cooking aromas and the unfortunate by-products of rotting fish and sewerage. Quite a lot to process at 10am in the morning. Our last day in Hanoi, and having visited the majority of the sites on offer, we scaled the streets looking for often tourist gems. One we had been advised to see was the Hanoi memorial house, which was described as a thousand year old dwelling with zen gardens. Perfect...and the hotel manager even pinpointed its location on the map for us. An hour later, having trekked around 200 metre square block in 35 degree heat, investigating every nook and cranny, the memorial house cupboard was bare! Looked nice on the photos though.... Next stop on the magical mystery tour was the Ly Thai To statue... Yes, very nice. As we both resembled steamed dIm sum, the city's major post office, equipped with air conditioning looked a real treat...and a treat it was. Not only did we manage to buy, write and send correspondence in the form of postcards, the main chamber had incredible acoustics. Cue covertly constructed loud, and shrill noise making in true Holmfirth style. If anyone has ever seen d*** and Dom, a kids television show a few years ago where they would yell things then hide in locations such as libraries,universities etc.. then you will understand where I was at! Incredibly immature, granted, but by Hercules's sceptre it was so amusing watching the local Vietnamese scan the ceiling for what they must of thought was a rare bird species. Experiencing the next half an hour back in the searing heat, we made our way into Hanoi's newest and classiest shopping mall. Versace, Louis Vuitton and Mont Blanc all featured heavily in here, but in my quest for some new sunnies, I persevered and also in mind to keep Jasmin away from the shop entrances! We stumbled onto a sunglasses store with what are normally mid priced brands. Deciding on a pair of Maui Jims ( which are £100 at the very maximum in the U.K) I enquirer as to the price....one minute later we were back trawling the streets without a new pair of Maui Jim sunglasses, as the 9500000 Vietnamese Dong price was a little steep ( £250 quid)! The search goes on. A nice stroll around the lake built a need for sustenance, so heading back to last nights haunt where the street food was, was the obvious choice. Whilst waiting for our dishes ( which were incredible... Soy, ginger mad honey glazed crispy chicken and Hanoi noodles) a young gentleman came to asking about my shoes. Well, I thought he was interested in them as they are most definitely the height of modern fashion( green and gold new balance minimus). He bent down for a scan to which he said ' man,man, shoes are broken' , and produced a bottle of superglue and began attempting to pour it on my shoes. Luckily, i remembered in and were d my Jedi training and said ' these are not the shoes you are looking for'. In real life, I moved my feet pretty sharpish and used a few words extremely crass and crude, which don't feature in mainstream English dictionaries.He looked hurt, and wandered away, tail between his legs. They will literally do anything to make money from tourists, and as annoying as it can be, you must admire their tenacity. The afternoon was spent by the lake in a breeze which I think may have just a placebo effect, as again I was sweating like a WWF at an in dependant drugs test. Jas and I were discussing moving on to Hue, as we had exhausted the attractions of Hanoi, when I had a tap on the shoulder by a well dressed Vietnamese student type, who said ' excuse me and sorry to be rude, but I would like to talk to you'. Seemed like a nice fella, so I replied' what can we do for you'. I wasn't expecting the reply.... ' you are very handsome man'. Now, let's be fair, I'm no oil painting and I was at a point where it looked like Jasmin had poured a bucket of water over me! I very quickly introduced him to Jasmin, my girlfriend and that I am ' not built that way'. I don't think he cared, as he just stood there grinning with his two university mates with him. I explained to him that I had many many bad diseases that aren't nice, and he seemed to understand then. He seemed like nice fella, and you can't knock someone for trying! Meanwhile, Jasmin was finding this incredibly amusing. Have you heard the saying ' what goes around,comes around?'. Exactly what happened next. Boarding the overnight sleeper train for a 14 hour journey was a prospect I was really looking forward to...ha ha. We were joined by a Dutch couple, Anna and Tom, who are typical Dutch - charismatic and ever so slightly nuts. We had a good chat with them, comparing places been, potential future endeavours etc. a movie was put on, and all sat down for a bit of chilling out for the first real time in the travels, with provisions of water, seaweed and rock salt flavoured Pringles, salted cashews and two spurious bags of chips/crisps. Now this is where it got interesting, and not how you may be thinking. Jasmine dangled her left arm down to bag of meaty pork rib and 5 spice chips/crisps and nearly head butted the roof, accompanied by a scream that only belongs in horror movies...Tom and Anna also reacted similarly based on Jasmin's reaction. 'There is something in the packet' sobbed a clearly distraught Jasmin. Being the super tough Aussie that I am, I casually grappled the top of the packet, at which point the packet started moving at the base! So, Vietnamese chips/crisps now apparently come with a free live pet mouse. Brilliant! I took said packet to the train staff, who couldn't speak English, so I pretended to be a mouse and pointed to the bag which was still moving. I think they thought I was completely mentally challenged, until I did a google search and showed them a picture of the alleged perpetrator. Two out of the three staff lost the plot and ran off whilst the remaining staff member very gingerly manoeuvred the offending item to a window and into the darkness of the rail tracks. So I thank Google, and always remember ' what goes around, comes around' jasmin.