Good news! The slightly oozing chicken skewer didn't mess with my insides, yay! I tip my cap to 'The Blue Turban' of Jodhpur, you didn't poison me!

After the diarrhoea free journey (seriously so chuffed about that), we arrived at Jaipur, the last leg of the renowned 'Golden Triangle' of India - Delhi, Agra and Jaipur.

Driving through the 'Pink City' and its hundreds of roundabouts I realised how hard it would be to navigate - its unnavigable streets weren't helped by all the shops being hidden behind identical steel shutters due to the money shortage at the moment; thanks a lot India.

We went into a textile factory and shop as Chelsea was hankering after some new parachute pants, having split the previous two pairs. Khan knew these men so they showed us around their factory where they had 20 staff. Seeing how the clothes were dyed and block printed was very interesting but seemed a monotonous process which was shown on the employees' faces.

Deciding that the prices of their garments were too high, though this didn't stop Chelsea asking them to unwrap and show her EVERYTHING, we moved on to find a 'mystic or guru' that Khan knew of.

Guru Sriva turned out to be squat Indian with an incredibly thick Canadian accent and he had a definite aura about him, an aura of knobbish-ness.

He had a c*** sure attitude and pointing at a woman that had just left the store, preaching that she had come back after five years to thank him for changing her life and tip him a thousand dollars. I coughed 'bull s***' from the other end of the shop but he carried on regardless. To heighten his aura of stupidity he said that palm reading and fortune telling was 'bulls***'; yeah, but rubbing a rock on your forehead and miraculously feeling brilliant is spot on mate...

After answering his phone half way through Chelsea's reading, in what was actually just a standard office, my skepticism was heightened dramatically. He went on to say that Chelsea needed to buy a £90 tanzanite stone in order to 'heal' a blockage of energy in her throat - apparently a necklace with the stone would be perfect! How incredible, there were hundreds of them in the next room! I am guessing that most of these 'blockages' manifest themselves in fingers, wrists and ears - anywhere you can get some jewellery.

Obviously, Chelsea refused to pay for the blue pebble though he then went on to say that people call him 'foolish' for being both a guru and a jeweller as he loses money. Actually, you crooked little imp, saying you're a guru attracts hundreds of tourists to your store, so pipe down and let us leave, you trollop. ...as you may be able to tell, I've had enough of people that are trying to sell me things and chatting utter rubbish in the process.

Anyway, scepticism aside, I can't wait for the elephant ride tomorrow. I'm going to pat the hell out of mine!