Only had a stopover day/night here in Chiang Mai but it has definitely been one to remember... Arrived early in the morning on the bus from Bangkok. Must be getting used to these long journeys as i managed to sleep a few hours and found it reasonably comfy. Got herded into the back of a van and taken to a guesthouse that we were required to look at in return for the free transfer. We were sat down by a 'women' called Julie who had an Adams apple and a voice deeper than Jims. S/he told us about the place and then informed us to be careful if we got to the night market as her Scottish guest took a knife in the throat a few nights previously. Sure enough, right on que the Scot walked past with a huge bandage around his troat. Nice. Really bigging the place up. told dear old julie that we wanted to be closer to town so headed off in search of somewhere nearer the nightmarket. The tuk tuk driver toodled off in search of some commission and dropped us of outside a guesthouse, where we were shown up to the 5th floor (despite no one actually occupying floors 1 - 4, i think they do this for the amusement of watching me hoist all my stuff up 5 flights). The room had a tv, a decent fan and a bathroom and was only 350 baht a night (about 1pound 75 each) so we dumped our stuff and headed out into town for brekkie and to book tickets to Laos. After Jim got measured for a suit and having a massage that felt like my insides were being squeezed out through my neither regions, and a slighlty more relaxing facial, we headed back to the room for a quick horizontal nap, which beats the vertical one I had the night before hands down. Got up for dinner 9pizza and wine!)and ended up back on the Sang Son whiskey in a Blues bar owned by a hippy looking local with the longest fingernails ive seen yet. Then headed to a random bar with a pool table. The rest of the night will go down as one of the most surreal experiences we have had so far - and that is saying something! It all started off pretty civilized, met some Ozzys and played pool with them. Then they left and ended up talking to this camp local guy who introduced us to the bar maids. Realised after about 20 minutes that despite all the staff being ladies, I was actually the only natural born female in the whole place. After they continued to top up our drinks for free, we learnt all their names (now forgotten) and i got to feel a genuine pair of lady boy boobs. they were pretty impressive...Never drinking again. Met a gross ozzy guy that me and Jim insiste don calling Powter, as in Daniel, all night, (see pictures to be uploaded soon youll see why). He was a bit of a bum bandit himself and actually tounged the camp guy for a minute of so. Almost puked. At some stage all three of our tops were removed and I had to take to ladyboy cup and tiara and proceeded to pretend I had won some kind of ladyboy title. Now im trying to explain it it sounds like some kind of alcohol induced dream. I thikn i would have just put it down to this if it were not for the abundant photos that Jim took... Anyway managed to make our way back to the hotel and crashed into bed. Woke up next morning feeling a bit confused and violated. Ha ha. went over the photos and shared the embarrassment and horror. Some of this evidence had to be destoyed - they were a lot worse for Jim than for me - thats all I can say at this stage He he ;-) Got the bus and headed to the Thai/Laos border...