I really can't tell you anything about Phuket as we only left our hotel room for lunch and dinner the 3 days we were there. I will post some pictures of the garden pool villa we had thanks to Trailfinders and you will see why, not necessarily what you were thinking. It would however be perfect for a honeymoon. Although from the outside the resort was underwhelmingly minimalist chic with municipal car park walkways, single villas and small 2 storey blocks surrounded by concrete walls in the gloomy style of the London South Bank, once inside we had a huge room with full length windows and sliding doors on 2 and a half sides, floaty curtains for privacy, a large open-air bathroom, partially covered, if it rained you could have a shower without turning the rain shower on and a large oval bathtub in the middle, which we didnt use as it would take a week to fill, all open to our patio and garden, a choice of chairs and table for breakfast or drinks, sunbeds for our towels only, a huge shady day bed with lots of squishy cushions to recline on and most decadent of all our own pool, at almost 8x3m big enough to swim as well as dip and shielded by a high wall, so we only had to shrug on shorts and T to eat at the tasty but overpriced restaurant or better still at an excellent beachside shack next door. It was a glimpse of how the other tenth of a percent live but the embarrassment at the OTTness of it in the face of world poverty wears off surprisingly quickly, comforted by the words of a guide that we were boosting the local economy we were seduced by it all, altho not enuf to order room service of a private meal cooked and served in our own garden for little over £100, mainly as the menu proposed would have fed a whole pool party.

We were on the northwestern tip of the island, the beach is protected but we were too late for the turtle egg-laying season, though like Khao Lak beach an hours drive north there are hundreds of tiny sand crabs, up to an inch long, like grains of sand embedded in perspex, invisible against the sand until they move at great speed like minute tumbleweed and disappear into a hole when they feel your steps.

Reluctantly early Monday we left after a prebreakfast swim, no need to worry about wet cozzies on the plane, a last glance at Thailand on the way, motorcycles using the hard shoulder to go the wrong direction on the dual carriageway, our taxi U turning next to the no U turn sign, a 4 person relay shoulder to shoulder at the counter to serve us a cinnamon roll at the airport, monks-only seats, the Thai next to me on the plane hiding extra hand luggage in front of her seat with a sarong, ipods left on for takeoff and a row of video recorders capturing Phang Nga Bay below as we took off.

A fatiguing journey, an hour flight to Bangkok, 6 hour wait for 9hr Qantas flight to Sydney in a hard lumpy-seated jumbo so old they still have ashtrays in the loos, a 2 hr transit and an hour flight to Melbourne. Tired, kinked and cramped we are greeted by 'Hi, how are you?' or 'hi-yow-aaah-yew' like a long lazy gargle. We have arrived in Australia.