Oh boy, travel day

Off we go to meet the tram. Being law abiding citizens, my bride put her 3 euros in the tram machine thingy and nothing happened. Huh wrong slot apparently. Just as we were figuring it out the tram pulls up. Let's get on, it seems no one pays to get on the tram anyways, and no one checks if you did pay. Bit of a flawed system.

When we arrived at Syngmata square, we needed to transfer to the airport bus 95. As we were. Walking to it, Dominique had to step around a crowd and came face to face with an angry old Greek woman" who blasted her verbally". Well I found this hilarious and started laughing and then she started yelling at me. Well the Greek guy behind me was laughing presumably at the situation. Anyway off we went

Went to the airport, met a guy who suffers the same issues I have when in the waiting area preparing to board a plan. Dominique mentioned she had to go to the washroom before we boarded and then sat there. Well, now they call for boarding and she joins the race for the female washroom, along with 12 other woman, leaving 12 perturbed husbands going "really, now? " I felt this guy's pain as he waitied for his bride to board the plane

Anyway, we arrive in Naples, Italy, get our luggage and find our transport bus which will take us 10 minutes from our BnB. They don't line up here. You don't buy your ticket from a windowed kiosk. You push forward and give your money to a guy who has wads of money in his hand. He gives you a ticket and you get on. Now what could possible go wrong with that system.

Now we arrive wholly s*** insanity. Scooters, buses, people, forget the friggin trains, the tracks give you a clue which way they are going. We were lost. Well, that means send Dom out and get us back on track. Now with the BnB you meet your host. Our first one in London, the key to our suite was in the mail box, next host met us in a parking lot after being picked up by a car service, the next we met our host who answered the bell at his suite. This one we met our host at the exit to the metro. He picked us out by my yellow back pack and confused look.

We walked up a hill for 1/2 a kilometre ( keep in mind I have my backpack, Dom's suitcase which has her backpack strapped to it) before coming to our suite. OMG what have I done. We are at the corner of two streets with markets poking out everywhere, kids playing soccer and scooters racing around and constant loud exaggerated Italian voices. I forgot to mention at one point, Dominique had to dodge a scooter guy who was ripping down the sidewalk. Friggin crazy

To enter our block, we have to key our way through a steel gate, then into the two person lift and finally get out on the fourth or fifth floor. Then you find your door which is a massive wooden door. Inside is an incredible 1 bedroom authentic Italian suite. Once our host leaves, we explore. Of course they have a bidet, well how do you use a bidet? Like any reasonably intelligent man,you google it and YouTube has an instructional video. Now that you all have YouTube "How to use a bidet" I will continue

1)Okay, check water temperature. Nice temperature. 2) Okay sit butt on bidet.....woah, too far back, bidet nozzle too close to me arse, not good. 3) Turn on water ......."oh yeh baby the Italians have something." Hold it, wholly crap I'm burning my arse with the scalding water. Abort the mission, abort.

Time for supper at which point the mayhem in this authentic area of Naples is in full roar. Oh boy, I feel how a lamb must feel as it's going to slaughter.

We wander down our street which resembles a north end back lane with merchants selling their fruit, clothing, liquor etc. We see a place that could best be described as a hole in a wall on any northend Winnipeg back lane. It's a pizza place which looks like a "buy by the slice" type of place. As we are looking, the owner invites us in where he has 8 tables. We discuss items and with significant language barriers, I articulate my desire to have an "OATK". Or as better known as a pizza that does once around the kitchen when putting toppings on. Niakwa pizza in Niverville used to have it especially prepared for me.

Anyway, we order a beer which comes in 500 ml bottles and Dominique orders a glass of which wine with our pizza. Her wine comes out and is in a pitcher that is 1/2 filled up. The pizza arrived and was wood fired and good but certainly not an OATK. We talk to the owner and he takes a photo of us with his camera and we discuss dessert at which point he reaches up and pulls out a bottle of "Grappa XO". Oh boy, this isn't going to go well. He serves me a shot and it burns like diesel fuel as I sip it. The he brings out a plate of amazing pastries freshly made, drizzled with melted chocolate. Oh boy. As we ate, we met his son who has Down's syndrome and is just a shining star of the restaurant.

This meal cost us 25 euros and when we gave a tip they were astonished. We shook hands and said our farewell, down the market we go....wholly s***, we came to a street that is smaller than any back alley, and scooters and cars honking and jostling and yelling OMG I don't know how to cross the street.

I make it across the alley and bought Dom a magnum of white wine for 2.50 euros. She has found her happy place. I went into another place and said "hello" and was greeted with "huh", at which point I started laughing as did the three ladies in the store, It was funny as I don't think they are used to daily tourists venturing this far into their daily lives.

Anyway to our suite, got into the lift and it all went black, of course. I purchased a mount Vesuvius and Pompeii all day tour from Naples for tomorrow. First we have to find molo beverello hotel, 15 minute walk away. And if Dom finishes the magnum, I'll be wearing her in my backpack like a baby carrier.

Good night, talk tomorrow

Harold