Thursday 9 October. We left the feather duster, hung up the French maid outfits and gave the Sheraton the finger as we drove out of Port Douglas and headed to our most northerly destination on the East coast, Cape Tribulation. We drove through endless fields of sugar cane before crossing the crocodile infested Daintree River on an old rickety cable ferry, then drove the hour or so through thick rainforest until we reached Cape Trib. We walked along the beach and admired the rainforest rolling down the hillsides to meet white sand and the Barrier Reef. Cape Tribulation is the only place in the world where rain forest meets reef. We drove round looking for somewhere to sleep but ended up opting for a camp site where Vicki was smuggled in the back so we only had to pay for one person. The following morning we walked along Myall beach to a rain forest boardwalk which zig zagged through mangroves and had an abundance of wildlife. On the way back along the beach we came across a beached puffa fish (we wiped it off and apologised) he was still alive so using my flip flop or thong as they call it out here I pushed it back out. It eventually swam back out to sea and hopefully survived. On turning back to look at the beach we saw a wave wash over my camera bag and only just got to it in time before it got really wet. The camera and lenses luckily were a bit wet but fine. We drove back to Port Douglas and slept at our croc camp with Brendon. The following day we drove to Mossman Gorge one final time then had our last night in the woods and drank vast amounts of wine. On our way out of Port Douglas we visited the house we stayed in back in February with Michelle and Collin to see if the giant spider was still by the front door but it had gone on holiday. We headed inland through the Atherton Tablelands via Mt Molloy and Marreeba planning to sleep in Kuranda but felt unsafe as there was lots of drunk aborigines in a small town so we drove the 30k to Cairns as we had planned to visit Tjapukai Aboriginal Culture Centre the following day. Tjapukai was great. We watched several dance performances and listened to Dreamtime creation stories then threw boomerangs and spears and learnt about bush medicines and what foodyou can eat and what you cant eat in the rainforest. We finished our aboriginal experience just after lunch then drove back to Kurandato Barron Falls before visiting the butterfly sanctuary and spending hours firing the camera madly like Japanese tourists. We stayed the night at a free camp site listed on our map in Atherton at a war memorial. The following day we drove to a place called Yungaburra to see the most visited tree in the world, the Curtain Fig Tree. This tree is a 500 year old monster with hundreds of descending roots. It was really wide as the original host tree had fallen into another and the fighad taken over that one as well. If that doesn't make sense look up how fig trees form on the net as I haven't got the mind to explain. We then drove to Mt Hypipamee NP to visit a site called the Crater. This is a huge…. Well….. Crater with shear cliffs on all sides and a pool of water at the bottom covered in thick green weed. I think the crater is the side of an ancient volcano. On the way back through the rainforest, after our visit to Tjapukai and now being fully qualified in bush foods, I found a berry that looked like a strawberry but smaller and was sure we had been told that you could eat this one. Dubiously I burst the berry between my fingers then tasted it. It burned my mouth instantly and I spat it out. I had a blister on the inside of my mouth for three days. We camped that night at another free camp listed in our book but had to give a three dollar donation at a closed down railway museum at Ravenshoe. We contacted Tully and booked our White water rafting for two days time. The day after staying at the railway camp we drove the waterfall circuit taking in Milla Milla Falls, Zillie Falls and Ellinjaa Falls. All were very impressive and at the last falls we saw three turtles sitting on a rock. We drove to Mission beach after the falls and camped in our old spot then caught the bus to Tully early the next day. We were very lucky as the sun was out and there was not a cloud in the sky. Tully has the highest rainfall in Oz and has an average of over nine metres a year where as London has an average of 0.8. The white water rafting was insane, we were upgraded to the extreme version free of charge as they had to make numbers up so this meant we would do extra things like swim rapids and do rock jumps.. We had six people in our boat and after signing a discloser saying basically if they drown us we won't sue we were in the water with our guide Johnny shouting forward paddle team or slide right or left. The rapids were huge and you had a job to stay in the boat. It was how I imagine being in a washing machine feels. A couple of times people were thrown out and had to be dragged back in before being splatted against a rock. At one point our boat flipped over and everyone was sent down the rapids boat-less. After running a particularly big set of rapids we weretold to get out of the boat walk up to the start of the rapids then float down on your back. This was great fun but it was hard to catch your breath as huge walls of water battered you and dove up your nostrils. There were several rock jumps along the way about twenty foot high and Vicki after a few pre jump jitters plucked up the courage and threw herself of the cliff which was amazing as she wouldn't even jump off the boat at the Whitsunday's. We went down a natural water slide with no boat, it was basically a waterfall and when you hit the water you get pushed down so deep it hurts your ears and you stay under for about ten to twenty seconds. We stopped for a BBQ lunch along the way and at the end of the day everyone was well and truly knackered. We spent the night on a camp site with a couple on our boat called Steve and Lisa from St Albans and had Tagine and a box of wine. The following morning we drove back up to the Tully river and watched other rafters to get some video footage then went for a swim. On the rocks on the river you can see hundreds of tiny gold flakes, you can pick them up but they are like grains of sand and my gold rush fever soon stopped after gathering three or four specs and realising I'd be here for ever to get enough to do anything with. We started our journey in land heading for Alice Springs and leaving the East coast for good we were very exited and feeling a bit nervous as the east coast is a bit of a tourist conveyer belt and now we were heading to the extremities of dessert and wilderness… Bring on the red dirt and gas mark 8.

A quick joke for you all;

Why wasn't Jesus born in Australia?

Because they couldn't find three wise men or a virgin. (haha hehe)