The title of this blog is Pink Is Not An Appropriate Colour To Wear On Safari. (So sorry guys that I havnt written in so long. Cant believe that my last blog entry was from Melbourne. that feels like so long ago! Anyway this computer is good and not too screw-up-your-face expensive so let me tell you about AFRICA).

Having arrived promptly for a 4.30am start (yes thats right, 4.30am) I was told by the rather formidable game ranger to go home and change. Pink is not an appropriate colour to wear on safari. God I was so embarrassed, I hadnt even thought. Put me on safari at the beginning of this trip and Id have been fully kitted out a la Lara Croft, Id probably have had a utility belt. As it was I was wearing my roxy t-shirt because it has sleeves; I didnt want a sunburn from that baking African sun. And it was clean. Which the khaki one that I had to change into was not. But it did mean that I didnt spook the rhinos. Rhinos are best not spooked.

This was an early morning game walk with armed guides. I had to walk in the centre because I was the female. I liked that. Beats being sent out in front as bait or left at home doing the washing. It all started off a bit 'and heres where a giraffe drank this morning', 'look at this elephant foor print'. Then it all got a bit serious. Because we were trailing rhinos. Ive seen rhinos up close now. And theyre pretty mean looking. What worries me about rhinos is they cant see terribly well. So if they hear you and they decide to run away rather than attack, chances are theyll end up charging in your direction anyway.

We were in Kruger National Park, Id joined up with a Dutch guy and hired a car for 3 days. We saw HEAPS of animals actually. Way more than I'd expected, all just at the side of the road. Id be looking through my binoculars struggling to see anything and then my views blocked because theres an elephant 2 metres from the car. Quite a shock when you move the binoculars, let me tell you. We saw so many elephants, rhinos and giraffees, usually with little ones. It was a very chilled out way to do it too, just driving around all day with the radio on and then waaa! theres an elephant.

Couple of touch and go moments actually. We were parked up next to an elephant taking lots of photos and some women drove past us and wound down their window to say 'ur, be a bit careful eh, an elephant bull like this charged our car and then pulled up a tree in a temper when it missed us'. Ok we said, moving on.. !

The day I drove we set out from base camp and almost immediatley I need to pee (YES Id gone once before we left but I needed to go again). It took us an hour and 40 minutes to get to the next camp. You cant just get out of the car and pee in the bush (sorry Australia) cos theres lions out there but let me tell you it reached the stage where I was ready to chance it. We sailed past elephants, giraffes etc and Im screeching, 'Im not stopping!".

And then the grand finale of our Kruger adventure - haring back to the gate (you get a fine if youre back later than 6pm, all the animals are on the move and its dangerous. YEH, know that now!) we had 20 minutes to spare and we were gonna make it. Until we met a pride of lions with TWO males blocking the road. That was bad enough but then both males and 3 females began advancing on our car. It was really scary actually. At one point the male was right up by my window, I saw the green-yellow of his eyes and they looked HUNGRY. Aryan reversed all the way back along the road which annoyed me hugely (resident lion behavioural expert that I am I felt it would have been wiser to stand our ground) and we waited them out. By the time the road was clear we were seriously past the 6pm deadline and so drove back along the road too fast. And he nearly hit an elephant. Once we'd recovered Aryan said 'Wow that was exciting huh!' and I seriously wanted to kill him, I was so majorly stressed and he was being so... Dutch. Anyway I may have turned on the waterworks a little bit when we got back to the gate "Oh you have no idea, Mr Ranger, I was scared for MY LIFE!" and we didnt get a fine. Sometimes being British pays. Ok most times being British pays..