Dave says.... Greetings from St Petersburg. Our adventure as it has unfolded thus far. Saturday the 9th was more manic than we possibly could have imagined. With some much needed last minute assistance from Anne & Jason, we got everything packed away (sheds and plastic bags are very useful for such exercises), dropped in our keys with our friends at Foxtons, and headed for Clapham Junction. At Waterloo we thought (well I did) we had lots of time...but needless to say by the time we had changed some currency (top tip: don't leave it to the last minute and change your currency at Waterloo) we were once again rushing around. In WHSmith we discovered that I had packed no books for the trip (there is some dispute about how the ones I selected did not get 'packed'...). However, not only did we pick up some new ones, from conversation with the sales assistant I picked up the following riddle (it was that sort of day): I am a 7 letter word - what am I? My first 2 letters describe a man. My first 3 letters describe a woman. My first 4 letters describe a great man. The whole word describes a great woman. See if you get it quicker than I did (she wrote it down on a piece of paper for me as it was clear that I would have waited far too long in the shop trying to work it out). Eurostar sped us past Battersea and onwards to Brussels. The journey seemed to fly by. At Brussels I searched for an interweb as we had 90 minutes to kill. The bad news was that there are no interwebs at Brussels at 22.15 on a Saturday night. The good news is that the lager vending machines are open 24 hours. Our overnight train to Berlin was pretty luxurious. At some point we will get round to loading our photos to prove this point. Breakfast was served to us and we arrived in Berlin about 0800. Re: overnight trains. Now, on Tuesday, we have had 3 nights in total by this mode. Whilst I remain firmly committed to the concept (just as well as we have so many more nights to come), I have started making a steady log of the ways in which your sleep can be disturbed: i) very noisy people ii) noisy people iii) Belarussian border guards at 03.00 iv) Belarussian customs guards at 03.30 iv) Russian visa guards at 04.00 v) very noisy trains vi) noisy trains (eg taking train apart in Belarus and putting it back together again) vii) disturbing dreams [Chris Read decides to give up being ace stumper of Aussie batsmen (given it was a dream, it was probably the demon left arm of Blackie The King he was keeping to) and decides to become a Hard Trance DJ instead. Perhaps it was the thought of Geraint Jones taking over instead behind the stumps that had me waking up in a cold sweat] viii) train air con too hot ix) air con too cold x) being thrown side to side by rough track I digress. We had about 3 hours in Berlin before we had to get our next train. Enough time for a leisurely stroll to take in the Brandenburg gates, the wall, Reichstag, Checkpoint Charlie. Or so we thought until we realized we were running a bit late. Hotfooted it back to the station, weaving our way through thousands of Berliners participating in a walkathon... bought tickets.... picked up our bags...rushed to S-Bahn...9 stops to the right station on the East side of town...find the right platform...find our train... find our specific carriage, hot and gasping for air, with 6 minutes to spare. Panting, AM watched in slow motion as I turned to her and said, My Love, Berlin 'Takes My Breath Away'. So, our train from Berlin heads off for St Petersburg (takes about 40 hours). Less salubrious than our previous train but still fine. Our first major issue is lack of food or water (no time in Berlin to sort this out). However we did have a bumper bag of snacks from clearing out the cupboards at home (Canadian Bison Jerky, Brazil nuts, sunflower seeds, Cup-a-soup, Toblerone etc). We arrive at the German border, confusingly called Frankfurt Oder, and A-M is much more confident than I that she can source some scran in the time it takes before the train leaves. I am sceptical. However, as usual I am confounded as she returns with a bottle of lager, some water, and 2 of the largest kebabs in the world. Truly these prove to be the best as well as largest upon kebabs we have ever had. The fact that when asked which sauces and salads she wanted, the reply was 'alles' did help in this. Yum. Onwards through Germany and into Poland. Time passed easily enough as sleep lost from previous nights can be caught up during the day. No restaurant car on the train, so not much to really see or do bar reading and looking out the window and more napping. Our encounters with border guards etc are alluded to in the sleep deprivation section. I am not at my best at that time (or any time) in the morning so I cannot elaborate much. However, some of the processes they have seem a bit bizarre (Alex - your 6 Sigma would serve you well here). Eg, hand out entry forms to fill in and then take away passports. You find that elements of the form require your passport details. You wait for the passport to return. When it returns, they take the form from you without waiting for you to finish it. So we have entered Russia without our passport particulars on the form - hope we can get out OK! Madness, I say. Though I didn't say it very loudly as they all looked very stern and glum. The previous night we had been given a Belarussin form to fill in. The kindly looking lady chirupped away in Russian (or Belarussian or Polish?) telling us how to to fill it in. I wasn't falling for this. I tried my best to look dumb and confused (not tricky) and indicate that I had not a clue on what I was supposed to put on the form and indeed where. However, A-M undermined this approach by nodding away even though she did not have a Scooby as to what the form meant! The lady went away. I pointed to one part of the form where there were 3 boxes, one of which looked like it should be ticked. I enquired of A-M which of these we should then fill in? The reply was less than convincing. However, the kindly lady then returned with a copy of the form in English. Ha! My ignorance and refusal to comply was a clear winner! How we laughed and wondered why they didn't give us the English form in the first place (though I suppose if I was the train guard that would be one of my standard gags too...) Now that we were in full control of the form and what it was asking, we were even able to help a Polish teacher who couldn't understand it either. We woke up passing through Belarus. I say we, as A-M was sleeping away like an angel, so I tiptoed outside to look out of another window. I thought I should gaze a while out the window and form an impression, however representative, of Belarus. Here is my Belarus snapshot for you: i) there are lots of woods in Belarus ii) people like walking in the woods in Belarus iii) there are not many public toilets in Belarus (see i) and ii) above)) iv) re: iii) - these people also have dogs, who are undignified, and watch them as they go about their 'business'. Bad dog! Look away! v) there is not much paint in Belarus. I only realized this once I was struck by a coloured shed (in a wood), everything else was the same colour vi) using a strimmer to trim grass by the side of the railway seems a pretty pointless job. Satisfied that I had enough to blog on, I yawned and went back to bed myself. We realized that a timetable of our journey might have been useful. The point at which we realised this was as follows: i) train pulls into siding, toilets are locked ii) 1 hour later, situation still as i) iii) 1 hour later, situation unchanged iv) repeat iii) ie toilets have now been locked for 4 hours. This was a scheduled stop. If we had realised I think we would have gone to the toilet just before. How we laughed! (afterwards) Onwards to Russia. Arrived at 0630 this morning. Bags are in hotel in St Petersburg (room not ready till 12). Money is changed and we have had breakfast - a undefined vegetable and meat concoction that was very yummy and coffee. We are now in an interweb café posting this missive. We have 3 days here and then onto Moscow, where they have interwebs too. So we may (or may not) be online from time to time over the next few days. Cheers, Dave (NB Misbah - let me know if you got the USB stick OK) A-M says.... Poland and Belarus seem mainly flat, with woods, farmland and nor overly attractive towns - a hangover from the communist era. along with some big impressive railway stations andnplenty of guys in uniform. One interesting indication of the passage of time and our journey northwards was that the silver birch tress started off dark green in Germany and gradually became more yellow (ie. autumnal) as we approached Russia. answer to the riddle : heroine