The (awesome) writers of this blog would like to draw the attention of our followers to the following statement:

It has come to our attention that we are suffering at the cruel hands of the censoring elites, whether this is the Indian govenment or STA travel we have as yet not been able to ascertain, but rest assured we are pursuing the matter. If anywhere in this blog you see ****'s instead of words like S H I T or similar expletives, please fill in as appropriate. Thanks.

Back to the trip...we left Jaipoo (as it has uneffectionately become known) for the lake city of Udaipur (hopefully not to become Udaipoo). Those educated in front of television sets will know this as the backdrop of the James Bond film 'Octop**** . You know, the one with the big angry Indian guy who crushes dice in his hands when he's angry. The city still revels in its moment of fame, playing the film on loop in many restaurants. On the train down we were sat next to an ageing Aussie hippy still clad in the Tie Dye clothes he stumbled into, in a substance fuelled haze, 30 years ago. He kept saying things like "Far out man" and explaining his spiritual beliefs, and knowledge of the universe. He was called Jon. Nice guy though, much cooler than James. We also met an Indian guy, who was again intent on telling us about his spiritual beliefs, and attempted to convert us to followers of a particular hindu prophet by handing out little cards with his photo on and explaining that he had predicted world war one. I dont know his name, but he was much cooler than James.

Udaipur was more chilled out than the other places we have been, and we spent a large proportion of our time sitting under tents and drinking tea. It was very beautiful, largely due to the lakes which the town surround. It was full of mosquito's, largely due to the lakes which the town surround. We are keeping a death tally (Fern: 13, Alex: 7 (Fern goes mental when she sees them, nerves of steel and a steady aim)). We will keep you updated on this...We spent the afternoon wandering the old palace and watching the sunset over the lake. We ate in a nice looking expensive restaurant one evening, which served the worst imitation of Italian food we've ever seen. We should have known when we saw it was called 'Savage Garden' that nothing good could come of it. Alex felt the effects of his meal immediately, and continuously for the next day or so. He was not actually sick (Sick tally, Fern:2 Alex: 0) but just lay around farting and burping...still maintaining his increbible attractiveness naturally.

The next day we decided to travel in style, opting for a private car (there is no train) to take us to the city of Jodhpur, hopefully not to become Jodhpoo. We stopped off at a very impressive mountain fort (The second longest wall after China our driver took great pride in telling us) and an awesome marble temple. We stayed in the old part of Jodhpur, which is a city painted entirely in blue. We're unsure about the reasons behind this, maybe they just like the colour. Alex was now over his tummy trouble and so, of course, it was Fern's turn again. With Fern feeling unable to face the demands of city life, we took the opportunity to barricade ourselves into the hotel and watch films. Superman II was on, quality. We didn't feel too bad about this though, knowing we would be returning here in a few days time.

This morning we caught a crowded bus with a variety of loud horns (do you remember those toy guns that make a selection of ridiculous noises when you pull the trigger, it was just like that) to Jaisalmer. Alex had to share his seat some of the way with a 'Larger' Indian lady, and a young boy who had TB and took great pleasure in coughing in his face. Fern meanwhile grappled with her broken seat. The journey was better than expected. So we are now in Jaisalmer which is a desert fort/town near the Pakistani border made rich from old trade routes. Seems pretty damn cool from what we've seen so far, and we look forward to playing in the fort and maybe catching a ride on a camel in the next couple of days. Stomach's permitting...

Missing you all...sort of

x