There have been many complaints from our viewers about the quality of this message board.
Here at Watchdog we have to agree that it is crap.
We tried to track down the 3 travelling stooges but unfortunately, as is the case of this message board, they were unavailable for comment.
Trevor Mcdonald
And Finally........
An office worker from Hull has found the secret of happiness - from a puppy.
Jeff Bamber discovered the secret whilst out in the park with his new 2 month old puppy Biffo.
"We were out in the park yesterday walking Biffo and for a laugh we decided to make him get up a stick," Bamber, 29, told todays Guardian.
The look of pure joy and contentment that engulfed Biffo was so entrancing that within minutes a crowd started to develop to look at the little happy puppy, Bamber explained.
"I think the puppy up a stick made us all put things into perspective and re-appraise our lives, said passer-bye Claire Spicer. "There were a few sour faced people that were blasé about Biffo, but if you get blasé about a puppy up a stick then you may as well give up on life altogether."
After a few delightful hours, Jeff had to prise Biffo off the stick, whereupon the puppy seemed to visibly age within seconds and then tragically died in Jeffs arms.
"I think Biffo realized that his life would never get better then been up a stick and he simply lost the will to live," puppy psychologist Professor Bob Faberge told us.
Jeff, meanwhile, is taking a deep look at his life in the wake of Biffos short but lovely existence.
"I have a well paid job, a nice house, a beautiful wife and kids and a Playstation 2 but I cant say I'm truly happy," Jeff confessed. "Yet I put Biffo up a stick and it cracked it for him. Im not saying I want to get up a stick though, that would just be silly."
"Biffo was simply happy for no other reason than he just was. Puppy psychologist Faberge added. Theres a lesson there for us all but I havent got a clue what it is," he mused with a wistful look on his face.
Good Night & Do Sleep Well.
1 120X600 20060907 74645 Car Ent3 Jpg Sup Used 1 120X600 20060907 74645 Car Ent3 Jpg Sup Used
By the way, in case I dont get a chance to write again for a while Happy New Year.
Matt
Hi Everyone,
Sorry we havent been writing.
At the moment we are in Vietnam. We are staying with a friend of ours called Paul ( although he keeps asking us to call him Garry ).
I am writing this message to you on Pauls spare computer in the basement of his house ( its dark down here ). While I was sleeping one night last week our Nath heard a loud knock on the door. It then got kicked down by a load of Vietnamese blokes that Nath reckoned were the police. Paul told us that is was wasnt the police, it was the staff from the local PC World coming to take his computer away for repair. Very odd, but then again we are in a foreign country and their cultures are very different to ours.
Paul is a very nice man, very kind and considerate. He even loaned me his wig and boots for a night out we had last week, the young girls were loving The Rods thick black barnet. He has lots of daughters living here with us ( Paul calls them His Gang ). They all hide in the basement when the men from PC World come round. Again, different cultures.
Anyway, I have to go soon as The Gang are due home from school and its my turn to meet them off the bus.
Its Halloween and me, Nath, Paul and The Gang are celebrating with party games. Paul told me and Nath that he is going to get dressed up as a ghost and put the willies up us and The Gang. After that we are going to play bobbing for apples. Its Pauls favourite, hes told us that he is going to dress up like a wizard and the best bobber will receive the Glittery wand. I cant wait !!
Goodbye from Vietnam.
Matt ( aka The Leader )
Pictures to follow..
Rich
Over 7 weeks and still no pictures.
I've got a great one of me bending over washing myself in the shower.
A joke to keep you going.
A muslim woman knocked on my door last night, i never opened the door, i just talked through the letterbox to see how she f**king liked it.
later all
Mark
That's a good idea.
I took some photos last night at our local Chinese takeaway in Hull.
There's one of me stood next to the menu looking in awe at the vast array of Chinese meals on offer!
Another of me conversing with the friendly Chinese family who own it.
And one of me eating my chicken in blackbean sauce and chips.
I'd love to post them.
Ade
In response to Mark from Hull.
Lads, how about you release the password for the My Photo Journal area to your friends and family back home. They can then put some pictures of themselves on there with some stunning backdrops of Hull & Goole.
How about :-
Me Leaving home for work scraping ice off my car windows in the dark at 7 OClock on a cold December morning
Me Having a drink at my desk
Me Stood outside Morrisons in Brough eating a pie.
Me Having a drink at my desk
Me Leaving work for home scraping ice off my car windows in the dark at 7 OClock on a cold December evening
Me Sat on the side of the Humber Bridge
Anyway, just a thought.
Soap News
Matt - Here is the Coronation Street update you asked for in your emails :-
CORONATION STREET Sun 15 Oct - Sun 22 Oct
TERRIFIED Ashley has Claire locked up after she nearly kills baby Thomas!
He tricks her into getting treatment when she pushes the pram into a busy road.
Ashley knows something is wrong with Claire, says Steven Arnold, who plays him. He is really worried.
As the week begins Ashley discovers Claire has been lying about her mums illness.
Then Claire goes to the hospital and tells a receptionist she has been given the wrong baby.
When the receptionist goes for help, Claire runs off, leaving Thomas behind.
She goes home and tells Ashley that Thomas cant be their baby as she feels nothing for him.
Ashley retrieves his son from the hospital, and a doctor explains that Claire must have post-natal depression.
The next day, Ashley insists they take the baby out for some fresh air.
As they walk, he tells her she needs to see a psychiatrist but this tips Claire right over the edge!
Suddenly she shoves the pram with the baby right into a busy road, says Steven. Thankfully a car stops just in time.
Desperate Ashley then pretends to Claire that she could be right about them getting the wrong baby, and insists they go to the hospital to sort it out.
But when they get there, Ashley hands Claire over to the doctors, who say Claire must be sectioned because she could be a danger to herself and her baby.
Claire begs him not to leave her, says Steven, but its out of his hands.
Ade
******** URGENT MESSAGE FOR MATT RODMELL ********
Matt, any idea where the team stapler is ?? Tom says you had it last. I have an urgent job that needs stapling. Come on, give us a clue !!
