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These days I felt that I seemed that was trapped by depression,it liked the air around me.Since I knew Kenneth Veland,I hesitated on something(sorry,i don't know what is it.)something...I wanted to get but simultaneously felt frastrating and fearing.And I also involved by the trouble of guessing.Guessing,believe it or not,could destroy ones spirit easily,I felt these fellow guys' slight seemed irony.I felt strengthless about it.And generally,I began to feel fear about darkness.
And should I say it is loneliness?I do not know if I am masure enough to say it,and so,it is luxury ,the workd itself . Obviously,I am eager to keep this relation,or I am addicted to it.And it is different from any feeling before.If I have to find some words to describe this feeling,it is...Fear,Safe,Sound and sometime... I cannot help but want to get it.And the luxurious word,loneliness,it brought me the feeling of aimless,but also sometime I felttgat it was quietly possible and I have to get it.And,all of these thing squazed my soul into two parts.Like the word itself always behave its two hands.
And,myself,I thought I was stepping towards Kenneth's side,and desipte felt frastrated about it,I hope that I can get it from the bottom of my heart.Though I may did my own choice of it,but loneliness is still a problem . And maybe it is the inner,pravite Xavier s Face,now that,you see,the outer ,public Xavier.I am dreaming like a girl but have to more stronger and braver than most of guys.
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