I'll start writing this referring to my current location which is on the top deck of the ferry to Ometepe. I'm sharing my double seat with a sleeping Nicaraguan woman. Any moment, I can see her moving her head and using my shoulder or lap as a new resting place. Don't want that as I'm aware of the reputation of Wrexham women -my wife resided in that town prior to her seeing sense - when other women cosy up to their man! Not a place for a tempting dalliance with this sturdy seniorita...well more of a seniora if truth on thus occasion is to be told. Stomach cramps woke me up at 4ish this morning and I'll forgo the intimate details but it's sufficient to say that much of this morning was spent visiting and making an impression on a certain porcelain bowl in the hotel. We got to know each other quite well by the time our driver arrived at 12.30 to take us to the ferry which is located an hour and a half or so from Granada. Feeling slightly better by now but the waves are rolling! As soon as our transport reached the jetty for this ferry, a muscular man appeared from a secreted spot and and bundled us toward and onto the ferry carrying two of our cases. What a kind man! But... he was a "give us a tip" man. Our pot of dollar bills had almost disappeared but rooting around into almost every crevice, I discovered a crumpled dollar. Our man was not impressed and raised two fingers. Multiple meanings to this gesture without doubt but to avoid major fisticuffs with excessive blows being aimed at me from our aforementioned porter, a miraculous second dollar appeared from a previously unexplored location. Our man with a lot of head shaking disappeared to avoid sharing this voyage with us. An important consideration for me as a traveller is the art of perfecting toilet visit times to avoid the unpleasantries of the much used but the rarely cleaned public convenience. The strategy I have is to utilise the hotel room facilities prior to departure and limit any extra visits to a bare minimum. Any toilets linked to mass public transport are not to be accessed by me at any count as the floor let alone the seats can possess major residue. However, no choice today on the ferry. Quite wise to have brought hand sanitiser liquid from home! Onward then to Ometepe! Our baseball loving driver whisked us around the island to our home for the night, a very remote hotel which had few if any other residents. Yet another amazing place....San Juan de la Isla. We were given a lovely casita which sat among a forest of plantain trees and having opened our suitcases, ordered a Spanish tortilla for Alyson and me and a pasta and tomato dish for Caitlin. Sufficiently filling! There was enough time before the sun went down to step onto the lake side beach and to watch as the fishermen fished and hundreds of birds crossed from the main island to a tiny wooded islet to set up camp for the night. This is a very unspoilt, beautiful place. As night nosed in suddenly and very early again, we listened to birds of unknown names....where is Edgar the twitcher when we need him?.....croaking and squawking until they got fed up of their own noise and we fell asleep. After a limited but pleasant enough breakfast which included portions of fruit....the pineapples here are the sweetest and nicest I've ever tasted....and a plate of gallo pinto plus omelette, It was time for our too short a stay at San Juan de la Isla to end. A very laid back place and less business like than any other hotel we've been to thus far. Everyone was lovely and likeable but so chilled out and only attentive when you went looking for them. No complaints from us but since the bar has been placed several stories up by every other hotel, perhaps this one just reached the second floor. Anyway at eight thirty, Eric arrived in his four wheeled drive to take us on a tour around the island before the afternoon ferry was due to depart at 4. On the long track from the hotel to the main road, we heard a scary, voluminous noise emanating from above. Nearest sound to it? An elephant's bellow. We were instructed to get out of the jeep in order to catch our first glimpse of howler monkeys. They are comparatively small in relation to their noise level. Probably not our last encounter with these creatures who according to Eric put considerable initial fear into the souls of many Spaniards as they moved through the island's jungles at night during their invading years. Every main road we've travelled on has been in excellent condition even though life seems quite simple and traditional for most people on this island and there are relatively few cars or motorbikes. You tend to see many people walking or biking or astride a horse. Chickens or pigs dart across the roads and horses and cows defy you to bump into them as they precariously amble around and about the roadways. The people seem happy and quite healthy and the foods here are organic, fresh and mainly locally sourced. Very little processed stuff. At our first stop off with Eric, we were guided around an eco-friendly site where everything you need to put on a plate seemed to grow or be raised...mangoes, avocadoes, cashews, almonds, pigs, chickens, etc. And on this site at Finca el Porvenir were several petroglyphs, the standing stones with original carvings from thousands of years ago. Eric gave his interpretations of their meanings and we created some fanciful ideas of our own which he politely smiled at. These stones are in amazing condition, having been uncovered in the recent past. A privelege to be able to trace our fingers along the grooves cut about by the ancient artisans. Swimming was next. After changing within separate small roofless sheds, we plunged into the waters of Ojo de Aqua lake which is formed by a volcanic spring. Only a few swimmers there when we turned up. Cold to start but once in, no need to complain. An idyllic location and a welcome outdoor activity that appealed to Caitlin. Having drunk the coconut juice which a stallholder macheted for me, we changed back into our dry clothes and Eric drove us away to a lake-side restaurant somewhat off the beaten track again. We weren't that ready for a meal but since a few hours travel lay ahead and uncertainty about food arrangements in the evening, we decided to pick up the menu. My fish was half the size of Alyson's and appeared to have been rejected by a previous diner following a few sample bites. Hopefully, my imagination! Normally if Alyson gets bigger portions than me, I tend to whinge a little so that she'll pass hers on to me just to shut me up....even though I might protest ineffectively at such an action on her part. I didn't do much of a whinge this time and good thing too as the meal was bland at best and small portions meant that I only just reached the level of total boredom with the food when what was left on my plate was not sufficient to make me seem completely wasteful. The waiter was not totally happy in his role as waiter to us. We had probably disturbed his opportunity to follow a baseball game on TV and thus he only made sporadic appearances around us, i.e. when totally necessary. Mr. Grunt rather than Mr. Smiley. Perhaps his team were losing. And at the end, we caused him further annoyance and disruption by handing him two twenty dollar bills for the 22 dollar meal. No change customers and no change waiter. Deadlock! He scowled and turned on his heels with the North American notes. Off to buy a house? Ten minutes later...or maybe more....he returned with a mixture of notes and coins which he hurled in our direction. He received no monetary tip...and my Spanish is not sufficiently adequate for me to give the detailed advice he requires to achieve career progression in the world of table waiting. Behind schedule, we arrived at a wonderful museum which houses hundreds or rather thousands of historic artefacts which have been uncovered on Ometepe island. The display of ceramics was laid out to show the progression of skills and quality through the millenia. Most artefacts were in amazingly good condition. We also saw the grave..within a glass celinged case...of an important chieftain with objects of value and significance beside the bowls in which was housed his cremated body. Only the rich and powerful were cremated it seems. Another fascinating museum and I was happy to buy a reasonably priced animal carved into volcanic rock before Eric drove us towards our departing ferry. Shame that it was on route to the ferry that we came across an equestrian carnival proceeding at an unequestrian pace. Fiesta-minded followers swigged from cans of Toña as they sat overloaded onto the backs of trucks and open backed jeeps. We were squeezed behind a convoy of merrying locals who weren't determined, as were we, to catch a ferry out of here. Drummers drummed drunkily and blowers blowed a variety of blowing instruments as boistrously as they were able. Fortunately, after several near hit / miss incidents, Eric steered his way down a side street and got us to the boat on time. A few handshakes and muchas gracias and we were on our way across the sea-like lake. This time we sat in the cheap seats on lower deck. Caitlin and Alyson chose the front row as the bench seat there seemed in reasonable condition. I put up with mine a few rows further back although with a modicum of force I could easily have damaged it beyond repair. An extremely burly, to be polite, couple sat down in the row in front of me and sent the back of their seating into my knees. Definite likelihood of having to crawl off the boat at the other end with the force they were inflicting on my lower limbs. Fortunately, the two leviathanic lovebirds left for the upper deck carefully counterbalancing their weights to avoid causing a shipping disaster. Soon three brilliantly interesting North Americans took the seats and we talked about their exploits volunteering to teach pre-secondary children in Nicaragua. Interesting young people of substance. We arrived very quickly at the other side of the lake due to the quality of their conversation. San Juan del Sur and to Pelican Eye hotel. A stunning location. I was more than pleasantly surprised to discover that the town has been far from spoilt by tourism....yet. We were given a lovely casita that looked down towards the bay. A wild storm thundered and lightened around us as we were in our beds earlyish ready for an early start tomorrow.