07/08/13

Today's biggest achievement was actually leaving the villa. It would have been so easy not to. I have no idea where the time between 8:30 to 13:00 went! I got up and had breakfast, chatting to Nana & Ron, helped Ron with his laptop, then suddenly it was 13:00 and Tony was arriving shortly. I met the man who's kind enough to give me days of luxury on my backpacking trip, and he couldn't be nicer. Seriously kind, generous and really easy to talk to, it was good to finally meet him, as the last family member from the Borland clan. We had lunch with Tony's other half; Mark, who is also a really nice guy who is easy to get on with! So far so good! We had lunch and after uploading the last blog, I went for a dip in the pool, did some German learning as I've been slacking, and chilled beside the pool on facebook. This was when I decided to go surfing, a less successful trip than the last one; I only managed 1 long ride, it was rough, I dropped in in-front of someone. But the most terrifying and/or exciting thing that happened, on the first wave I went for and lost, my leash came off and my board floated unattended between me and the next wave. It is closer to me, but the wave is big and coming fast. There was a split second decision which had to be made; Leave it, or try to get it. If I leave it, I run the risk of losing it somewhere and it being harder to get, if I go for it and can't get it in time, the board could really do some damage to me, the fins could easily knock me out! I took the risk of going for it, swimming with all my might to reach it just as the wave crashed down, I held on for dear life but lost it, managing to grab the leash underwater. But as I surfaced, I caught sight of another wave coming. I swam to it again, pulling on the leash to get it closer. I climbed aboard, hanging on again, I maintained grip and picked up speed, to hell with this; I popped up and surfed that bad boy in. No leash attached. As I said; Terrifying & Exciting.

08/08/13

Last night, or should I say 'this morning'(?), was heavy. We went out for a meal last night at around 9:30, left the restaurant at around 1:30am, got back to the villa and carried on drinking and conversing. I eventually hit the hay at around 5:15. I was drinking red wine most of the night, and I usually get really dopy and tired with wine, but I guess the atmosphere and good company kept me more engaged than usual. The restaurant we went to was incredible, all the food was amazing and the architecture was really interesting, it reminded me of the John Peel tent at Glastonbury, but where the canvas dips, this one came right down to the floor, guiding the rain down a funnel to the ground beneath the building.

09/08/13

Where do I even start about the festivities of last night?! I'll start with yesterday, I did nothing. Didn't even leave the villa. I mean, getting up at 13:15 helped with the whole doing anything, but having a lazy day was exactly what I wanted and needed. The evening was playing host to the event I had been looking forward to; Nana & Ron's blessing. A typical Balinese event which differs from a wedding, it's only a 'small' ceremony with a meal after. This small ceremony was hardly small. The entire garden transformed for this ceremony; Two huge decorative pillars formed the foundation for the alter, a table beneath was littered with fruit and spice offerings for the God(s), a band were off to the side and where the two large cushiony outdoor seats usually sit became a stage for the dancers. On the other side of the pool was a table, set out for 23 people. But the thing that amazed me most were the petals. Not scattered, or just placed, but decorated in rows of different colours. So, with the scene set, I'll get on with the actual ceremony. First of all I had no idea how to put the Sarong on. Stood in my room, trying to fold it in a million ways until Dewa saved my skin. He came to my door and asked if I needed any help. Thankfully, it became apparent that I wasn't being retarded and the sarong is just too long for me. He went off and brought me one of his to wear. Also helping me put it on. With my sarong on, looking like an idiot, I left my room and headed over to the main social area. By this point, most of my hangover had gone, but I was starting to feel a bit shaky. Never fear, beer is here! I sat there, sipping my beer, as more and more people arrived. We moved over to the garden area on the other side of the pool and the boys came around with canopies, more drink and I started to talk to these interesting people. Where they came from, what they do, how they ended up in Bali, and I tell you what, it was fascinating! The ceremony, although in front of everyone to see, was a very private affair. It took place whilst the rest of us stood around chatting. So in terms of what actually happened, I'm afraid I can't shed much light on it. During the actual ceremony the band were playing what I can only assume to be typical Balinese music, very 'plinky plonky' if you know what I mean. When the official stuff was all done with and they, for some reason, had rice stuck to the forehead, normal kind of congratulants were in order and then the dancers came on stage. The dancing was similar to that which I've seen around the rest of Asia, a lot of focus on the fingers, but they moved in ways which were very strange. The eyes were the creepiest thing about it, doing this shifty eye moment which made me feel very uncomfortable. But the best was yet to come. My favourite part of the evening was the next dancer. A man wearing big robes and a mask, a mask decorate with a funny, intense face and expression. This is something you have to see for yourself, and I'll try to get a picture for it, but it was hilarious, approaching people, shaking their hands and it was hilarious! After these festivities it was time for dinner. Oh my god. Dinner was incredible. I was sat next to Peter, a Dutch born Australian, a very interesting man who had a lot of experience and advice to give about Australia, travelling and life. It was pointed out by Michael, the American I had met the night before, that most of these people are at least 2ce my age. But you know what? That's fine! It is genuinely great to talk to people who are even 3 times my age! That was all really, the rest of the night consisted of chatting and other people dancing. I went to bed at about 4 or 5am.

11/08/13

I tried to write some last night, but I was too tired to be an interesting articulate writer. My head, right now, is absolutely buzzing with information and memories, it will be an incredible achievement if I manage to write down even half of what I want to! So, without further delay; This was 'The Party of the Year'!

I was expecting some cool decorations, decent lighting and a decent DJ, but nothing like this! The entire building had been repainted with tiger stripes to mimic the theme of 'Jungle Tribal', there were plenty of girls walking around with barely anything on, fake tribal tattoos and looking absolutely amazing. We had lunch at around 2pm and that was all I was going to eat for the next 11 hours. We sat there, admiring the dancers and this is when I discovered that Mark, is a good scout. It was like sitting next to my Dad with the amount of spotting he was doing. After a lot of drink, the sun started to go down and the event started to get interesting. Dancers on podiums, girls in bikinis, fire breathers, the entire place was buzzing with life and entertainment. I slipped off to take some pictures of the beach and ended up talking to an Italian couple who have been travelling in Australia. Amazing to think, even in a pimped up, high end party like this, I can always a couple of backpackers splashing out. I walked around soaking it all in and eventually found my way back to the table where there were now a couple of bottles of Vodka. I wasn't 'on it' as such and usually I reserve vodka for times when I need it, like going to Club Neo in Yeovil, or Aruba in Bournemouth. But I had been on wine all night and I fancied a change. This change was the best decision. This vodka; Ketel One, is the nicest vodka I have ever tasted. Mixed with a dash of coke, you could hardly taste it. Hell, you couldn't taste it! Mark and I hit the dance floor on a mission he called 'Finding Amy', Amy being 'the girl next door'. A mission which ended up potentially the opposite of what he had intended. He left me with a 42 year old Australian woman who was already married. I mean, don't get me wrong, she looked good for her age, but still. The night drew to a close at around 11pm, early for a party, yes. But it started at 2pm. We got back to the villa, had a sausage sandwich and some boiled eggs as drunken munch and I reached my bed at the early time of 1:30am. Earliest this week! However, I knew Jim and the gang were going out in Yeovil, so we managed to skype during their pre-drinks. I forgot to write about the day before! Very briefly; Me, Mark and Andy, one of Mark's friends, went down to the main beach at Kuta for a surf. I spent about 2 hours in the water, but I could have done more, the waves were small and manageable so it was great fun! Really enjoying Mark's company, a real genuine guy.

12/08/13

I didn't do a lot yesterday, played the uke, swam in the pool. A proper 'Villaday'. Until I decided to go for a surf. Mark said he'd join me, but he wouldn't go in and he'd take photos, perfect! Or that's what I thought. We went down there, I hired a board, went in, and almost drowned. The waves were messy and strong. Huge in fact. I couldn't even paddle out due to the waves crashing down on me, sending me into a tumble where I could just manage to get above in time. This was a massive contrast to yesterday, but I still took it as a lesson, I now know when waves are too big or messy to surf! I called it quits pretty early on, and we sat there as the sun went down.

And today? Well, I've just got back from having a massage and buying a wallet. I decided: If I wasn't going to surf today, I will have a massage. They cost about the same, so why the hell not! We had lunch at this beautiful restaurant right next to the sea and after, I went to find said massage. Walking down the road, I saw one for 55,000. A cheeky €4. That will do! Now, what I'm about to tell you is pretty important for what happened later. The lady giving me the massage MAY have been a man. You know it's hard to tell, but there was something about 'her' which made me think 'Man'. So, the massage was pretty average, really. I'd had better and I'd had worse. When she was doing my back, she got my bum out. I had my underwear on, but she pulled the sarong down, pulled my boxers down a bit and gave that a bit of a massage too. I was unsure about this, whether it was normal or anything, but it didn't bother me, so long as it's just the cheeks being massaged and not my prostate! When she had done my back, arms, shoulders, legs and arse, she asked if I would like my torso massaged...

***WARNING, PEOPLE OF A NERVOUS DISPOSITION SHOULD NOT READ THE TEXT IN ITALICS***

I had never had my chest massaged before, so; Yeh! Why not, pecs and abs, and woah! What are you doing? Her hands were on the top of my thigh and her arm was rubbing, seemingly innocently, over my cock. I felt a bit unnerved, but as I said, it was seemingly innocent. So when her hand started to slip down my underwear, I put my hand in the way and made sure she didn't go any further. Did I inadvertently sign up for that? Did she assume I wanted it because I'm a western man going into a massage parlour by myself? Either way, I declined the service.

***YOU MAY CONTINUE READING***

13/08/13

I am sat in the airport, having just had a Bintang and taken the standard photo for leaving the country and what an exit I made! A vip escort was arranged for me when I got to the airport, whipping me through security, check in, immigration, and straight through to departures. It was so easy, and after looking at my ticket, seeing 'Gate 6' and the board saying 'Gate 2', I had an hour and a half to work it out. Instead, I've been sat here, drinking beer. It's not a bad airport, but it's quite small. I still don't feel like I'm going on an 18 hour journey to the other side of the world though! I guess it's because my time in Bali has brought my travelling ways to a grinding halt. Instead of sleeping on floors, I was in a ridiculously comfy, double bed. Instead of eating local food, I was dining in high end restaurants, drinking wine. Instead of hanging out with people who have been travelling for the last year, I was reunited with family and met people who have been successful in life. Jumping on the back of a moped and risking my life? Nope, getting driven around in the safety of a car. It has been the complete opposite of backpacking, although I did some awesome things. I did climb an active volcano, improve my surfing (despite almost drowning a couple of times) and I hit up the best party of the year on Bali. I know there was more to offer, I know there was diving in the north, beautiful beaches on the east coast and other islands close by, but you know what? It was exactly what I needed, so if my Nana, Ron, Tony, Mark or Dewa is reading this, I'd like to say thank you for making the end of my backpacking trip a completely indulgent and relaxing experience. It rounded it off nicely!