I'm so fancy but you already know!

Vegas never ending dream (and story) part two

Days 3-5 of the New Year

After our foray with the Persian kings, rental abuse of the Nuge and trancendace into casino table mooching the 3rd day of the New Year was all change.

Saying goodbye to the Nuge was emotional checking out of the Encore and heading back to Doug even more so ;)

It was good to change clothes after 3 days of sink washed pants (yes even Fodder) you kinda wish your not such a light packer! However we were still not resigned to a night in the trailer park as Mr Lawyer (circa San Fran blog) had voyaged out to Vegas for the night (like all good yanks do) for a night of debaucherous antics with his three favourite (non psycho) females in the residence of the Venetian.

After a meal of crab cakes and Bud (American dream) casual Ceasers day gambling; it was time to up the ante and go shoot some guns!! LADS!!!

As an excitable person... Who was excited about shooting a gun...maybe they should have started off with something a little smaller than an UZI....

Shooting was both exciting and scary and more than a little bit dangerous... Especially with the 3 -tick - box ease in which the place an automatic (20 rounds in ten seconds) in your arms.

What have I said before about wanting to shoot Capt CB?

It was a cheap thrill...which to be honest is still haunting me and getting me all deep about gun morals.... I'd do it again but maybe something pistol-esque on a hunt... Which blatantly I get offers to every weekend.

After a Venetian pit stop for the 3 S's a night of gambling and gin awaited (shock horror) at Cosmopolitan's finest. 4 days in and in the company of a professional gambler we still didn't manage to win so focused on the free drinks instead. The lack of NY crowd meant the waitresses were much more apt at meeting our alcoholic needs.

By 10pm we were a little unsteady on our feet, a little rash with our gambling decisions and a little annoying to the croupiers; so we went for a large yank meal to sober us up.... Except it was tapas... Half the size of an anorexics portion... Shared between four and served with sangria..... MESSSY.

Normally this isn't a problem, but we had a 6am start with a 4 hour bus ride to the Grand Canyon... Being sensible and not pursuing a club we called it a night safe in the knowledge that Captain CB had set the alarm...

Why do we trust this girl with anything.

6am bus departure, 5:50am alarm cheers Han; Running through the Venetian and down the deserted Vegas streets in the midst of an alcoholic/ sick haze was definitely Vegas' finest hour.

But we made it...

To the disappointment of the people on the coach who had to inhale our alcoholic stench for the next 4 hours.

Four hours on a coach is pretty much a standard journey now but this one went particularly quick (I was particularly thankful for this after pouring a bottle of coke on my ass)

Especially with our 'only black man to drive a coach in America driver' whose attitude and patronising of the non-English coacheers was sehr amusing. Oh and not forgetting Fodders grand pull of the month.... Rydog- new groupie and all time winner of Americas most charming teeth!

Hoover damn was the first stop (slightly confused as we thought this was in Canada) A not- at - all interesting black and white 1920's documentary accompanied the dulcet tones of the drivers explanation of how it was built but ignoring all that and just taking in the American extravagance at its best:- was marvellous a meticulous feat of what hard work, dedication and 100 years can get you. Go visit!

As we got closer to the Grand Canyon the temperature plummeted, the snow levels rose and the wind chill grew... This is the desert right?

Naturally I was prepared for a trek around a Canyon, my open toed sandals were more than reasonable especially with socks on....can't make this style up.

From the first glimpse you know why it's called the Grand Canyon. You stutter, open mouthed at the magnitude... I'm still stuttering and flabbergasted now... my first world wonder.

It is such a wonder that even now I am still wondering at it. Deeper than you can possibly imagine... wider than you can believe and it's goes on and on on

(much like our good friend Baggy and her sister :)

Unlike BF It's also such a beautiful beautiful colour. Like the rest of Vegas words cannot describe how unbelievably majestic this place is and once again the photos do it no justice.

With California's most winning smile (Rydog) in tow we trooped around socked sandals and all in the snow. Children got precariously close to the edge, the SW nearly erupted at one snowballing brat.. We had enough on our hands controlling Capt CB (whose a climber you know)

All the typical selfies, balancing on the edge and falling off the canyon photos were taken with one brilliant new addition....

NAKED ON THE CANYON.

Whether it was a Rydog ruse to get us naked or he could just sense the inner nudist, within ten minutes of meeting A liberating (albeit cold) experience occurred on the canyon.....

I'm sure the canyon will see many nipples in it's time but I'm not sure my nipples will see a canyon quite like this one.

Just in case you weren't flabbergasted enough (by the canyon not the nakedness) the sunset... Oh my the canyon sunset once again s*** on anything seen so far... A little sunset spoilt at the moment.

It was a long but worthwhile trip, we appreciated not driving, we appreciated naked time. We appreciated the people we met... Especially Fodder and the last 5 minutes of a dog attack.

Our final night in Vegas was cemented by sleeping in Doug one last time, yes in the trailer park... From the Encore to the Venetion we were now back where it all began and it's time to say goodbye to the Fodder and to the U S of A (not sure which one I'm more upset about leaving)

As me and the Capt join the spirit in the sky to head on down to Colombia (oh no Jked) moving up in the world from a city of guns and gambling to drug cartels and spaniards.

I'll keep you updated on the tears

Much love

S

Xxxxxxxxx