This blog has been rated PG due to strong language from the start.
After a fragmented sleep of no more than 3hrs I decided to give up trying and go straight through. Engaging literature is doing little to settle the mind for sleep.
Throughout the day I passed the hours away pottering around and before I knew it a chatty American had left me rather tight on time to get my train. I quickly scooped my things together and dashed out into the plundering rain.
I quickly find a taxi, it's not difficult they're everywhere..."Bandra Terminal please mate", in my most neutral and clear English accent. The type you do when talking to a toddler.
"No sorry" - maybe he misunderstood me. So I asked again, still no! I try another and get the same reply. I'm really pushed for time now and I'm starting to sweat! Third time lucky, fortunately and much cheaper than I anticipated, 250rupees. I had planned to take the train but time slipped away.
The rains are relentless. The floods in places up to a foot deep on main roads. The drivers barely acknowledge them and I got repeatedly splashed in the face. For some reason we needed all windows down apart from his. Cheers for that mate!
The surroundings changed massively as we approached Bandra Terminal, it was extremely rustic, filthy, but teaming with life and industry. A plague of rickshaws buzzed around my taxi with military precision. We were ground to a virtual stop, being over and undertaken every time a tiny gap appeared by the smaller and more agile rickshaws. The train departure time was ten minutes ago.
I ran sporadically towards the crowds, being called and heckled for business on route. Now is not the time to piss me off trying to sell me your s***.
As I ran to the top of platform 3 I nearly missed the conductor checking the tickets. I was at the correct train and right as I asked "what cabin" it started to roll. "Number 6, but run quick".
I hadn't a clue what number any of the cabins were but was aware I'd booked myself into sleeperclass. As the speed of the train increased I found a second class cabin reasonably empty so I dived on thinking I would play dumb if questioned.
....Women, only women! Just fecking great, I'm in the women only cabin. The one and only women's cabin on a train of about 50! What's the bloody chances of that....(50/1 I would say)
I still wanted to check I had the right train so asked one of the women... "Udaipur?" I believe the response translated to roughly "you're not meant to be here you catastrophic bellend". They were correct.
30 minutes later at the next stop I sheepishly slipped away and before I could find cabin 6 the train started to move again. I jumped into another second class cabin and found a seat amongst 24 beady eyes.
I'd just like to point out that second class is not quite what you would imagine. Imagine a 6 x 8 shed with 10-12+ people in. Some on the floor, some on a second tier of wooden slats, and some as it got busier even clambered on the luggage rack towards the ceiling.
The first few hours I worried a conductor would jump on and do a ticket check but it never happened and I began to consider relaxing. I get the impression most backpackers wouldn't dream of sleeper or second class travel on the trains. There was permanently a pair of eyes on me. A certain fidgeting buck toothed individual sat starring at me hour after hour. Which was fine, until he got closer and closer.
First it was the seat in the next section, then the seat opposite me. I chain my rucksack to the steel seat, put my belongings away and start to get increasingly agitated. Wondering if I give the scrawny little t*** a slap will I get lynched, I even contemplated kicking the f***er off the moving train as he peered out the door and spat repeatedly. Maybe I have murderous tendencies or maybe I'm just tired!
I didn't arrive at this level of aggression lightly, I tried starring back, he refused to flounder in his resolute stare. I pulled papers out my bag, he unapologetically put his head over my shoulder and seemed confused when I scowled at him.
Thankfully he decided to jump on to the luggage rack directly above me and have a nap. Few!
I start reading again and after about half an hour I feel a drip on my leg, raining again. Or so I thought.
I look up to see a finger length globule of spit dangling from the corner of his mouth. Un-f***ing-believable! So not only has he created levels of uncomfortableness beyond anything I have ever experienced, he is now drooling all over me and I spend the next two hours moving my leg periodically as each droplet gathers momentum enough to drip down.
So let me recap; I am half way through a 17 hour train journey I nearly missed. I think I am about to be robbed, molested, stabbed, spat on, or all of the above. I have had 2 hours sleep in over 24 hours and there is every chance I am about to be thrown off the train for not having the correct ticket, at 2am in the middle of bloody nowhere and everybody is bloody starring at me! So yeah, I am about to get Jackie chan on this dribbling socially inept freak!
Luckily a bunk became available so I hopped up and tucked myself out of sight a little. Finally I could relax. It's now 4:30am. Oh and did I mention I am right by the toilet, big big mistake! Honestly, huge mistake but I nap for a couple of hours.
As I approach Udaipur I feel the heat rising. A combination of daylight and heading north towards the unforgiving Thar Desert. Finally I have arrived.
On the exit from the train I see multiple traveller types exiting the upper, air conditioned coaches. Nice one dave. One immediately approaches me, a pleasant Malaysian guy called Jayden. We share a rickshaw to the lake. Much of Udaipur is orientated around a large central lake with a hilltop backdrop framing the picturesque Venice of India.
Jayden gets dropped at a hostel recommended by the driver and I continue to my pre booked room. We trade details and plan to meet later. It's strange what no conversations with anybody for 24hrs can do to your mind. Not a single word spoken. I guess I will learn all about that if I make my way to Rishikesh and the pilgrims of Yoga fanatics.
Rooms good, tiny, but has good wifi and a fan, what more could you ask for at less than £2 a night....and I've just discovered a rooftop bar! This place is fantastic, beautiful mountainous view the one side and a lake view the other.
I'm already thinking how I can pitch my emigration to here to the family! I figure I consume more than £2 worth of food a day at home and don't contribute to board to effectively it will benefit the parents if they fund my lifestyle here....Maybe!
So now I'm chilling with Otis from North Carolina, planning a boat trip on the lake, today is a good day! Today is a very good day. I still need some bloody sleep though