Chiang Mai 26th - 30th October

Left Bangkok for Chiang Mai on a VIP bus and it was well worth it for the 9 hour journey - much better than the crappy version we took to Bangkok. Only sorry that we won't be taking many more of them as we've definitely decided to fly from here to Luang Prabang in Laos. Clearly I'd had a few beers when I was pressured into this decision by Sarah, but having checked the Laos airlines safety record extensively it doesn't look as bad as I'd initially thought (please be nice to me fate).

Bus seats were fully reclining, we got a blanket and little packed lunch thing, a free meal when we stopped, front row seats with loads of leg room and a couple of free films. Note: The Fast and the Furious 4 is one of the worst films of all time and Vin Diesel couldn't look more gay if he tried. I was massively excited when they put on a Steven Segal zombie killing, Blade type film, but sadly there was a fault with the disc after 5 minutes - noooooooo.

We're staying in the old part of town at the Na Inn which is great and the staff are unbelievably friendly. Spent our first day getting our bearings and booking white water rafting and cookery course excursions.

There's a big difference between the people and atmosphere up here and in Bangkok, much friendlier and more relaxed and people stop you in the street for a chat rather than stopping you to sell you something. Felt a bit guilty the first few times as were waiting for the hard sell line, but it never arrived. Thai people say that the local's smiles in Chiang Mai are from the eyes as well as the mouth and it's definitely true...

Have become slightly obsessed with how much dinner costs to almost Scrooge proportions. First night we managed a 3 dish dinner with beer for 3 quid so second night we felt like we'd splashed out when we paid 7 quid for a massive mexican meal from 'Diabolo Heavenly Burrito'. Menu warned us the portions were big, but I'm pretty sure Daniel Lambert would have struggled to finish my burrito or Sarah's quesadilla after the amount of free nachos we put away. Sarah got a doggy bag for half of hers it was that good.

Bettered ourselves the next night with dinner costing a total of one pound fifty from a street restaurant - cheap for beef noodles!

White water (well, brown water full of dirt) rafting the second day was a blast, although after a two hour journey up there on a REALLY bumpy road we'd done a fair bit of white knuckle ride before we even got on the raft.

We met a group of 4 60 year old rafters from Oz and England who joined us for part of the day and Chad and Megan from the U.S. who were rafting instructors helping out the locals for a while. The guides were great and a good laugh though not 100% sure I believed them when they said their names were 'Ping Pong' and 'Banana'.

A few banterous episodes followed including one of them pointing out a snake in the jungle to Sarah before throwing her over the side and them saying 'no flip no fun' before flipping the raft and us all piling into the brown stuff which didn't taste particularly nice - a bit like I'd imagine 'Collon' chocolate milk to taste (see photos).

Rapids at some stages were grade 4 which is pretty hairy apparently and we headed into rocks headlong a couple of times. The old boy kayakers joined us in the raft for the dangerous bits they couldn't kayak through and we reckoned some of them were ex-army (particularly as one mentioned 'Nam' a couple of times) as one of them was shouting orders at me which I obviously did my best to do the exact opposite of.

Also did a 'helicopter' which involved everyone piling into the back and spinning it round really fast until it flipped over. Water's a lot warmer than in the UK, but a whole lot dirtier too, and spent the next day or so drinking a lot of Coke, which apparently is the cure all for massive river swallowing... we will no doubt find out in the next day or so...

Met up with Chad and Megan for a drink later in town, after we'd poured half the river out of our trainers. Sadly couldn't persuade them to stay for the pub quiz, which we soon realised was taken pretty seriously by the older expat generation as team after team piled in. Sad to say, despite our fine performances in various East Dulwich quizzes, we got absolutely humped, especially as we managed to totally stuff up the joker round...We were awarded the "trier" jug of beer (quiz was compeered by an American - hence the "trier" rather than "loser" title...), which we left most of, having already had several Singha (no, this wasn't the reason for us losing - the quiz was age-ist). The Shame.

We've also been out doing a little bit of the cultural thing as well, with a Thai cookery course. We headed out to the market first with our group of about 10 others. Thankfully it was covered, as it was yet again pissing it down. Then off to an organic farm outside Chiang Mai where we learnt to cook 5 Thai dishes each, with Thailand's front-runner in "comedy chef" as our teacher for the day - his gags were pretty awful, but instruction was decent, and it was a great place to learn. We got to pick some of the ingredients from their herbs growing there, learnt that there are 3 types of Basil in Thai cookery - cue lots of "Baaaaziiiiiil" Sybil-style squeaking, then stuffed ourselves silly at lunchtime - fortunately they had the ever present Thai tupperware - a plastic bag that you tie in a ridiculously complicated way to avoid leakage. I'd tell you how, but i'd have to kill you...plus a recipe book to try out our skills when we get home. YUMMY - we still have some Pad Thai and spring rolls in the fridge for later!

Sadly, our attempt to go and watch some Thai boxing last night with a couple we'd met on the course was a total wash-out - a cramped tuk tuk whizz (the drivers here are insane) around town to various venues which were either totally shut, or had dancing girls or ping pong matches - no not that type of dancing girl and ping pong, people. After initial distrust of our taxi driver just trying to make a fast buck, we finally found out that the main stadium was shut for 3 months due to a fire, and the fights seem to have moved to a different night at the other one, so we're trying again tonight - we have a flyer, the fight is on. Paul is delighted - i can hardly wait to watch 2 grown men kicking the crap out of each other... We are totally avoiding the tourist stadium in the old town, which is apparently not proper fights and has a ladyboy cabaret at half time... boooooo

Kick Boxing (Muay Thai)

Finally made it to the kick boxing at the second time of trying after a quick shufty around the very busy night market. We got ringside seats with a few others we'd met on our cookery course. Me and Phil massively up for it, the girls not too sure.

The ring and surrounding seating was all pretty small, but it made for a great atmosphere and the locals really got into it. There were also a few bars dotted around the outside so you could have a beer watching the violence. We were so close to the action you could actually smell the tiger balm on the fighters and hear what the cornermen were saying (although in thai).

There were a total of 7 fights, including one lady fight (not lady boy before you ask) and the action was pretty top notch with a couple going to points and a few TKO's. Fights are only 5 rounds, but judging form the pummelling the fighters get, I'm surprised they can last that long. There's also a 5 minute pause when the fighters enter the ring so they can go through their ritualistic preparations.

Top of the bill was a Canadian v French fight at about 11 stone which ended when the Canadian fighting machine broke the other guy's nose with his knee - looked very painful. People would pay good money to see that and we did.

One other point to note was the lady boys dancing some sort of choreographed routine in one of the side bars during the interval - harrowing.


Mountain Biking

Next day on an activity packed Chiang Mai stay we decided to go and do some mountain biking. We decided to do the 'intermediate' course after witnessing people coming back from the 'exterminator' route the day before with gaping head wounds and severe friction burns.

They kitted us out well, with full on guards and decent bikes plus a guide and we paired up with a dutch couple who also looked like amateur biking spackers - in other words, on our level.

After a few minutes we soon realised that 'intermediate' meant 'Lance Armstrong would struggle' as the course turned into steep, rocky, narrow lanes. Sarah got into it a bit more than me (must have been my bike) and I fell off into a hedge over my handle bars while saying hello to two thai women farmers who found it highly amusing. Margaret who was with us struggled more than me though and had an impressive swearing vocabulary which I did my best to better during the descent.

We thought we were home and dry once we got back onto tarmacked road, but we both managed another fall when I tried to hand Sarah the camera while both still on our bikes. I took her out and we both crashed - now still a bit bruised.

Can safely say this will be our last mountain biking of the trip - can still feel the saddle about a week after finishing.