'Ah Salam and good evening to you worthy friend... Please Please come closer... To close! Welcome to Aquaba, city of mystery, of enchantment and the finest merchandise this side of the river Jordan on sale today, come on down. I see your only interested In the the exceptionally rare,,, don't be filled by its common appearance, it is not on the outside which counts, but what lies on the inside... It is more than what it seems. A diamond in the rough.'

We start our final day in Jordan with an early departure from the desert. We wave goodbye to bad romance the camel and our new adopted friend Tiger Dog and brace for a 5hr bus trip to Jarresh in the far north if the country. (cue 2hrs of sleep, a lot of lionel Richie and a super string coffee) we arrive. By this time I well and truly have cabin fever and a numb arse for my trouble so bounce off the bus the a gummy bear bouncing here and there everywhere ready for adventures which go beyond compare!

The ruins at Jaresh are beautiful columns everywhere, I feel like Ben Hur as I mount my chariot ready to race. I a Marcus Hugheses the firstest, leader of the people of the north, brother to a tesco'd brother, father to a son (at some point) and I will eventually see a beer again in this life or the next!

We spend a few hours exploring the ruins before arriving at the theatre, nearly perfectly maintained. I race for the top and plonk my bum on the top of this mini colluseam. Then a surreal moment takes over from nowhere the sound of bagpipes drones into the arena. Amazing grace duelled my two Arab military officers. I sit transfixed by the site bamboozled by what I see staring in disbelief!

Fortunately the painful sound passes and we head back to our hotel to prepare ourselves for the feast to come. Having slept in a tent last night, ride a camel and sweated mightly in a bus it is safe to say the the sight of a shower was a longed for one for our selves and each other. I think we may have been slightly ripe! Thanks to Molton Brown I rejoined the human race, descending for heavily tan mud to healthy glowing olive!

We arrive at the hotel often frequented by the king of Jordan and take our place, 15 people at a banquet fit for the king himself. We decant the foot amongst us, fresh unleavened bread, homous, yoghurt, spicy sausage, dinner meat, tender chicken, supple pork, lemon and mint juice alternated with mango surprise. More pitta bread, red hot chilli, tziki and of course Shisha to aid the digestion. Needless to say 11 forklift trucks were required for us to exit the building! And return for our final night in the hotel at which point myself and Scott finally got round to sorting the education system out!