Days 1 & 2 - Idyllic Island No.1 (South Sea Island). This sandy island cannot be more than 200 x 80m and no more than 8 foot high - one big wave and........ Only about a dozen guests. First night we sit on the beach looking at the Milky Way, the second night we are more scociable and join in on a mad drinking game. Everyone else is on beer and I'm on red wine - wake up with slight headache! Both days spent reading lying in the sun until we can take no more and hide in the shade of the palm trees or do a bit of snorkelling. The tidal range is quite phenomenal and where you spend the morning snorkelling you spend the afternoon rock pooling.

Days 3 & 4 - Idyllic Island No.2 (Kuata) - More days doing Notalot! This island is volcanic and offers a bit more exploring opportunities. A group of 20 English students turned up and seemed to move around the island in a pack - slightly late for lunch and you're going hungry - bloody English.

Days 5 & 6 - Idyllic Island No.3 (Sanawai) - Tiny, tiny little place run by a load of blokes from the local village. Beach was covered in volcanic pebbles washed in from an explosion on Tonga 6 months ago but they treated us to lobster both nights, illicit beer (no licence) and "Kava" cermonies (drinking a mildly narcotic concotion of crushed up tree roots and water - makes your tongue numb!).

Days 7 & 8 - Idyllic Island No.4 (Coral View) - As far North in the chain of island as we would would go - seemed as good as place as any to propse to Kymbo and I got a Yes!

Days 9 & 10 - Spent two days on a cruise boat (or piss-up boat as it should be known). Us old codgers seemed to outlast the students on the ifirst night and the crew seemed seemed to delight in whatever idiot wanted the FMU cocktail they had invented (F*** Me Up just in case you were curious) - that'll be me then!

Days 11 & 12 - Idyllic Island No. 5 (Manta Ray) - Me (Jon) went scuba diving for the morning and it hurt my ears like it always does but the dive itself was fantastic while Kymbo power-read another 3 books it seemed. We shared the same powerboats to get back to the main ferry boat as the Fiji Sevens rugby team. Asked them if they were any good and apparently they are the World Champions - what do we know!? Looking back on Fiji as a whole we didn't do a great deal other than drink, eat, relax, sunbathe and read books but that was the main idea. Got back to port and boarded the plane to Oz!