MEKONG RIVER

Two minutes across the river from Thailand, we quickly found a hotel in Houay Sai and headed out straight away to try and get tickets for the two-day slowboat ride down the Mekong, armed with a little crib sheet of the latest kip/baht/dollar/pound exchange rates. For a refreshing drink, we bought some fresh pineapple juice served not in a cup but a plastic bag with a straw, and climbed up the nearby hill where young trainee monks were busy washing at a novice school at the local monastery. Apart from the beautiful landscape, we were immediately struck by how much poorer Laos seemed than Thailand, despite only being separated by a narrow stretch of water.

Next morning, we got to the pier at 8.45am to buy our tickets for the boat, although the boat didn't leave until three hours later. This gave us time to enjoy the novelty of a baguette and jam for breakfast, the first proper bread we'd had in ages. The baguettes, which we were delighted to see were readily available everywhere, and the occasional French road signs, are a hangover from the days when Laos was a French colony. But, otherwise, French wasn't nearly as widely spoken as we'd expected.

Six-and-a-half hours squished up together on an uncomfortable hard wooden bench was probably not the ideal way to spend the day but it did give us the chance to watch the world go by and see life on the river. A slowboat down the Mekong is one of those oft-quoted 'world's best journeys', and we were really pleased to have the opportunity to do it, although we were a little disappointed that the views were given a grey-wash because of the crop burning in the hills. That said, it did lend the area a romantic haze which Emma, at least, liked. We passed fishermen throwing out their nets, friendly waving children playing in the water and all manner of animals bathing along the shores en route to Pak Beng, half way to Luang Prabang.

Pak Beng was a small dusty village which thrives on the tourist trade, thanks to boatloads of travellers stopping off every night. We were very relieved to finally get the chance to stretch our legs on arrival here. However, we somehow managed to find ourselves staying in possibly the worst hotel in town. Now we've stayed in some pretty grotty places so far on this trip, but this one will take some beating as a result of the extra wildlife sharing our room. After dinner overlooking the river, we went to bed early in preparation for another long day on the river, and because there was nothing else to do in town. Tired, we were dropping off to sleep under a baggy mosquito net when we both got the feeling that we weren't entirely alone in our room. We heard a rustling noise from somewhere near the bed and sat up, swearing our heads off. A mouse or, more likely, a rat, was scrabbling around in our bags and tucking into an open packet of biscuits we'd left on the floor without thinking. Emma bravely turned the light on and grabbed the packet of biscuits as Duncan opened the door, allowing her to chuck them out in one quick motion. Fortunately the room was tiny, so all this could be done without moving from the bed or having to touch the floor. Satisfied that Ratty would push off and find some other unsuspecting tourists to feast on, we tried to go back to sleep - only to hear more rustling shortly thereafter. This time we moved everything off the floor and tied our bags to hooks and the door knob, which seemed to do the trick. Just as well, really, because soon afterwards there was a power cut on the dot of 10.30pm (or more likely they just turned off the generator) so any further evasive anti-rodent action would have had to be done in the pitch black, which was a little beyond the limits of our bravery.

Having enjoyed our time in Thailand so much, we were distinctly underwhelmed by our first impressions of Laos - an overpriced baguette and a bad coffee, a no-stars, rat-infested hotel and two long days on cramped, hard wooden benches. Emma was definitely more of a fan than Duncan of the slowboat down the Mekong, and perhaps if we could have splashed out a bit more on a little more comfort, and if the scenery hadn't been shrouded in smoke, we would have had a whole lot more to rave about. But the whole experience made us all the more glad to finally arrive in the hallowed Luang Prabang, the former imperial capital and another UNESCO World Heritage Site.