Perth Part 3- The Guest from the West

So this blog includes Melanie's mother Christine in an (unwanted and overlong) guest role. Only joking, it's a delight to have visitors. As we had a person to entertain for a few weeks we have been touring Perth and Western Oz like it's going out of fashion.

Before we get on to our trips and visits we have some other news. We now have a next door neighbour. Luckily for us he is keeping in trend with everyone else on our block and he is mental!! He looks like fat Elvis in a Rab C Nesbit vest and he acts likes Alan from the Hangover. Most afternoons he can be seen outside his apartment having a smoke while a mixture of Leann Rimes, Spandau Ballet or Elton John blasts from his living room. Fortunately for Declan the weird neighbour seems to be oblivious to his existence and he only talks to Mel. This has prompted a worrying thought that one day he might arrive at the front door with a bag of coins offering to buy her!!! Declan will accept any and all offers as long as he throws in the Elton John CD.

Week 1

Our first visit was a day trip to Perth Zoo. The sprawling inner city zoo provided us with a chance to show Christine all the crazy Ozzie animals in their natural-ish environments. The kangaroos, emus and squirrel type marsupials are all allowed to roam about in a bush like reserve while people meander through and avoid the droppings!!!!! The zoo also has all the common zoo animals, lions, tigers and elephants while including lizards and snakes. The penguin pen and the orang-utans provided us with a few giggles and the koalas rounded the day off with their cuteness. After walking through the night tunnel full of bats and nocturnal critters we checked out all the tiny monkeys before heading to the gift shop!!

So throughout the week while Declan was hard at work bringing home the bacon Melanie and Christine jollied about Perth seeing the sights. Even though Christine was on holiday Mel had arranged a whole host of activities to ensure that she wouldn't get a minutes rest. The first few days were used to bed her in and show her our little area around Freo. The dynamic duo headed off on a Hop-on Hop-off bus ride around Perth seeing all the sights and taking in the views along the esplanade and Kings Park. At each of the 11 or so stops they hopped off and had a wander around. One of their stops led them to the Bell Tower, Perth's answer to Big Ben. The Bell tower allows for engraved padlocks to be added to the railings that surround the monument. Mel had the idea many moons ago that she would have her Mom place a padlock on the Bell tower in memory of her dad.

Another one of their merry trips included a day down at our local beach enjoying some drinks in the tea room. One of the nights Declan chose the activities and took the pair off to Freo pier for a lovely fish and chip dinner before we all delighted in the awesomeness of Iron Man 3 in extreme screen 3D. Christine having never seen a 3D film decided that for most of the film she would sit without her 3D glasses on and only afterwards was surprised she had a headache.

During the first week of Chris's trip Australia celebrated ANZAC day. ANZAC stands for Australian and New Zealand army corps and the event is essentially the Australian version of Remembrance Day. As mentioned in previous blogs, Australia is very serious about honouring their fallen soldiers and ANZAC day is the epitome of this. The country has a national holiday and holds dawn services and parades across the land. The dawn service in Perth was held at Kings Park and had a record number in attendance, some 100,000 people showed up to pay their respects. We unfortunately didn't attend the dawn service but we made sure we got to Freo to watch the serviceman's parade and partake in the 'guard of honour' at the Freo Oval. That afternoon we arranged to have a lunch cruise up the Swan River. Upon boarding the boat Christine was a little bit worried, the last boat trip she went on was about 30 years ago and as she is scared of her own shadow she was a little bit apprehensive. Fortunately for all of us the boat was as safe as houses and as we embarked on our jaunt up the river we settled into our table. We knew it was our table as it was labelled SHRIVER, keeping in trend with the global misunderstanding surrounding Mel's name.

The cruise took up the afternoon and as we motored up the river we had a delicious lunch and a few drinks. We passed a heap of million dollar houses along the route including the most expensive house in Perth costing $60 million. Not just houses but the multitude of yachts and the amazing scenery made for a lovely view of Perth. As we neared the city centre the towering buildings filled the landscape. We harassed a few other passengers to take some photos of us after we had managed to drag Christine out on to the front of the ship. (For those interested in the nautical term for the front of the ship, it is called Port!)

With the weekend approaching Mel had to go back to work for the day and we both worried that we would return home to find the house a wreak and Christine nowhere to be seen. We were unlucky on both points and there she was ready to fill us in on her day, which included a conversation with a crazy person in the park!!! Saturday rolled on and we headed into town to explore the Freo Prison.

The Prison opened about 5 minutes after the first people landed in Perth. The original settlers brought along British and Irish convicts to build everything, including their own Prison. Picking the largest hill in Freo the settlers got the convicts to dig out all the sandstone for the original buildings and kept them in the hole that was left. This continued for a long while until the hill was virtually a flat piece of land. The settlers then got the convicts to build a proper prison complex on the grounds. With actual builders and more settlers arriving by the day there was no need for the convicts to build things anymore so they just locked them up, in the middle of summer in 50 degree heat, many died. The ones who survived decided to use their digging and building skills to create a labyrinth of tunnels under the prison to escape. The prison now offers a tunnel tour but it took alot of energy to get Christine on the river cruise so we thought we'd save the tunnel tour for another time. The prison only recently became a tourist spot as it had been vacant since closing in 1994. The prison closed after the prisoners decided to riot about their appalling conditions. The riots included burning down the main roof of the prison and taking the guards hostage. They finally managed to sort the whole mess out after agreeing to move the prisoners to a new prison up north and giving them all a Burger King meal. That's not even an exaggeration; the terms of handing the guards over were that they all got to have whopper meals!!!!!!!

That afternoon we had a lovely late lunch with Mel's uncle and cousin. We didn't have whopper meals but the grub they rustled up at the brewery turned restaurant called Little Creatures was lovely.

The Sunday involved bussing it out of Perth and down to Mandurah (Mannnnnndrah as its known) we headed to the harbour side and breakwater. This was a lovely part of Mandurah and totally different to the area Mel and Dec had seen previously. The marina was full of high end boats and the surrounding houses and coffee shops made the place feel affluent! Christine loved the area and has decided that she would love to retire there. It was at that point that Dec and Mel decided that they would definitely be going back to blighty!!

Week 2

Leaving Declan at work again, Mel and Christine headed into Perth City centre. As a little surprise Mel had booked for the pair to enjoy afternoon tea. Now this wasn't any old tea at any old tea room, this one was at the top of the city in a revolving restaurant. The C-restaurant sits on the 33rd floor of one of the city's highest buildings. When Melanie explained that the restaurant rotated, Christine had it in her head that she would need to be strapped down in case she fell out. That wasn't the case and the two slowly revolved around while enjoying tea and cakes getting the full 360° view of the city.

Mid week we all headed back in the city to the big top that has been assembled in the central park. The big top houses the world famous Cirque Du Soleil!! The show named OVO was a spectacle to behold blending the circus acts we know and love with a subtle love story. The show centres around the happenings of a colourful ecosystem teeming with life, where insects work, eat, crawl, flutter, play, fight and look for love in a non-stop riot of energy and movement.

At the helm of this kaleidoscopic hub is Master Flipo, a charismatic and quirky chief insect, and a fabulously eye-catching Ladybug. The Ladybug immediately piques the interest of an oddball stranger, known as Foreigner, who arrives in their community toting an enigmatic egg strapped on his back. As the larger-than-life production delves into the daily lives of these mischievous creatures, we were treated to a string of extravagant acts, each showcasing an unimaginable skill - from the majestic display of strength in the Dragonfly's hand-balancing to the fast-paced foot juggling of the Ants .A troupe of Flying Scarabs threaten to steal the show with their nail-biting, high-flying aerial act, in which the group fling their bodies into a series of twists and turns and leap into each other's arms in the heights of the blue and yellow big top. And the crickets running, jumping, flipping and climbing across an eight foot high wall with the help of trampolines makes for a fittingly stunning finale.

However the skill of The Spiderman on the slackwire, defying gravity in a succession of mind-blowing feats including wire-walking and upside-down unicycle riding some 15 feet above the ground, left us all in a state of shock. The whole show amazed and wowed us and made for a brilliant evening.

In keeping with the trend of booking and organising trips for Queen Shrive to go on, we rented out a car and headed 300 kilometres south to an area known as Margaret River. Margaret river has been on our list of things to do for a while and even though we spent the weekend there we will still head back again as there is just so much to do.

To make the most of our weekend we headed south very early on the Friday morning setting out at the ungodly hour of 6am. Two people in the flat found getting up that early quite easy however the holidaymaker was under pressure to be ready on time under the fear of being left behind. The drive down was as easy as pie, as the road was just a long straight one. We had decided previously to get breakfast on the way down in a place called Busselton. Busselton is home to the longest wooden jetty (pier) in the southern hemisphere stretching almost 2 km out to sea. Construction of the jetty began in 1853 and was continually extended until the 1960s when it reached its current length. It was closed to shipping in the 70s and now serves as a gigantic fishing pier with a little shop and an underwater observatory at the end. After having brunch at a lovely cafe on the waterfront we ummed and ahhed over whether to walk out to the end of the pier. The pier does have a mini train that ferries people out to the end but sadly was fully booked for the day. After much deliberation we eventually decided to make the walk. The view at the end of the pier was worth the walk and how many people can say they went 2 kilometres out in the ocean without getting wet!!

Busselton is situated at the top of the Margaret river region and our next stop was the very bottom. We headed down through the countryside passing through the main town and a host of vineyards. The historic Cape Leeuwin Lighthouse at Augusta is situated at the tip of a spectacular peninsula where the Southern and Indian Oceans meet - it is also the most south-westerly point of Australia. The lighthouse is still working making sure vessels navigating the treacherous cape don't crash against the rocks. As the tallest lighthouse on mainland Australia, Cape Leeuwin Lighthouse decides to charge an extortionate fee to look out of the top, so we decided against it and after having a look around and a few pictures we headed to a nearby town for a coffee to watch the sunset with. After checking in and getting freshened up in the hotel we enjoyed a few much needed drinks. We headed out for a spot to eat and spent the night listening to a live band in the local pub.

Fresh as daisies we head out towards the Indian Ocean to have breakfast by the beach. We luckily found the arty farty-iest place on earth to have a bite to eat. After being covered in a cuppa by the worlds s***test waitress Declan enjoyed the self titled 'Big Breakfast'. Now any establishment that has a breakfast should undergo an inspection by someone that has a healthy appetite before they can use the word 'Big' in the title. Not only was there not enough meat on the plate, the sausage was tiny and it was a spiced Italian one. Yes you did see the number one there. ONE sausage!!!! on a so called big breakfast!!! The biggest travesty of them all however was the lack of beans and the inclusion of lettuce. LETTUCE ON A FRY UP!!!!!!! (Declan food rule 39. Never eat a breakfast that contains rabbit food.)

Moving on from breakfast and in need of perking up we drove up the coast road basking in the beautiful views. Our destination today was a vineyard and the Chocolate Factory!!!!! The glorious year round sunshine and the temperate climate make the Margaret region great for growing grapes for wine and cocoa beans, chocolate plants to you and me. So naturally having fields of chocolate plants eventually prompted someone to open up a mini factory for people to go and sample the delights. We sampled our fair share of free chocolate while we scuttled around and then some. To say we went passed the 'help yourself' counter a few times would be an understatement. We did however buy some chocolate and some hot chocolate powder and it tasted sublime.

After our exploits in the chocolate factory we went off to get lost, literally! Some would say that Yallingup maze would be mainly for kids, they would be wrong. The huge wood panelled maze kept all three of us happy for hours. The maze was full of secret doors and hidden entrances. From the outside it seemed like a relatively easy task to get to each of the four numbered outposts, being inside however it was easy to lose our bearings. As a team we all found our way to the first corner and glanced out over the rest of the maze. The challenge now began, Mel and Chris against Dec in a race against each other to get to the other corners in succession first. Being a kind sport Declan didn't give the other two any head start and ran off into the maze like a man on a mission. Suffice to say it wasn't a challenge beating the girls to the next post and Declan was reserved in his glorious triumph. Now was the time for chivalry and he gave the ladies a 2 minutes head start to find outpost 3. Little did they know Declan spent the time wisely and worked out the route!! The third tower was ridiculously hard to get to, the route wasn't easy to work out and included going through a couple of trick walls. It was a close fought race but again Declan was victorious, and after a short lived victory he ran off to find the last tower. 4 for 4 and a good day at the office for Griffin. The last tower had an overhead walkway back to the beginning and a last challenge was posed. Could Declan race back through the maze faster than the ladies could saunter across the walkway?

Have you ever heard a more preposterous challenge?

Long story short, the ladies won by a country mile and it took Declan about half an hour to get his breath back after attempting to run back through the maze!!!

Back on the road we headed towards Yallingup. Yallingup is the best place on the whole west coast of Australia for surfing and even touts itself as the inventor of the sport. That obviously isn't the case as a quick Google search reveals surfing for sport was coined by Hawaiians. That doesn't stop the Ozzies claiming that they did and if it keeps them happy then so be it. Yallingup however is the perfect type of beach for surfers and holds one of the surfing calendars yearly events. The area was full of mansions built into the cliffs and the whole town was very wealthy. Obviously surfing is a very profitable gig. Back in the car we continued journeying north, we headed through a quaint little town called Cowaramup. The locals call it Cowtown as it is the dairy hub of the West Coast and dotted all throughout the town is life-size model cows pulling various poses. Onward and upward and after another short drive we arrive at Cape Naturaliste. We successfully travelled Cape to Cape on our whistle stop tour of Margaret River. There was another lighthouse here but nowhere near as fun as the previous one.

We treated ourselves to an ice cream and another cuppa before we headed north back to Perth after a great trip.

Week 3

Yes folks, she stayed for THREE WEEKS!!!!

This week featured a trip to Whiteman Park. Now this isn't a racially exclusive area of ground it is named after its founder Lew Whiteman. The area is the largest bush land reserve in Western Oz and is absolutely massive. The park has its own mini town where the Whiteman's lived many moons ago that features its own train line to get from one side of the park to the other. The train line features a vintage train and carriages from a bygone era, during the summer a steam train pulls the carriages along, we however are in winter so a be loud diesel motored us along the rail, the ride was lovely and the driver tooted the horn to everyone's amusement. The park also features a transport museum to house the old trains, cars and buses from Perth's beginnings. We had a little wander around in there before we stumbled upon an Alpaca farm!!! Randomly Western Australians keep and breed Alpacas as pets and every year they all come together to host a small pageant. Walking around the tent we had to hold our noses as 100 or so Alpacas in one place causes a stink. The pageant gave out prizes and it was quite funny walking about seeing the little animals with their fur all combed and permed.

The rest of the week the ladies took themselves off in the car to various places to do a spot of shopping. One of the days included a trip to the Perth aquarium.

The aquarium, AQWA as its known, specializes in marine animals that inhabit the 12,000-kilometre long coastline of Western Australia. The aquarium holds over 4 million litres of water and is home to approximately 400 species of marine life, including more than 4,000 fish. AQWA is themed as an underwater journey along W.A.'s coastline and is broken up into 5 distinct areas. Each area represents the unique marine life and environments of different regions along W.A.'s coast.

The main Shipwreck Coast aquarium is 130 ft long and 66 ft wide and holds 3,000,000 litres of seawater. It incorporates a 322 ft underwater acrylic tunnel, the largest in Australia. This exhibit contains 3-4 metre grey nurse sharks, 4 metre smooth stingrays, large loggerhead turtles and over 70 other species of rays, octopuses, sharks and fish. Other featured animals include leafy sea dragons, moon jellyfish, clown fish, juvenile saltwater crocodiles, starfish, octopuses, cuttlefish, rock lobsters, scorpion fish, eagle stingrays, sandbar whaler sharks, black tip sharks, Port Jackson sharks, rescued turtles and many more. Unlike many of the other visits Christine went on she actually wasn't scared of this and thoroughly enjoyed her underwater adventure.

The night before Christine went home went journeyed into central Perth for one final dinner. The restaurant we dined in 'The Lucky Shag' had come highly recommended by friends. The dinner was lovely and rounded off a charming visit.

The three week visit was finally over and after a teary goodbye at the airport we waved off our visitor and went back to a strangely empty house. Thanks for visiting Christine, hope you enjoyed it.

And that's all for now folks. We've been up to plenty more but this blogs already as long as the hills so we'll save it for another time. Stay classy.