We did not really know what to expect from our trip to the red centre but what happened certainly was not what we expected! We started off our trip by arriving in Alice Springs. The hostel, Toddy's, was nice and comfy and we made the most of it before the camping out trip on which we were about to depart. The group was quite mixed and I was earwigging as the French tourists had hired a French guide, extra to the Engish guide, Jerry (who also doubled as cook, driver, camp guard, botanist, gologist etc etc!). My earwigging did not last long, however, as the French guide jumped ship after an hour, claiming he did not like having to compete with the sound system! He was apparently a teacher at the local prison but Dave and I suspect he had been let out for a day trip...

Having been in a tour group in China where the guide makes little effort to speak your language I felt sorry for the French and offered to help as much as possible - and this is how I ended up playing 'French Tour Guide' for the next 3 days. It was quite tiring but was a fantastic way to talk to people who I might not have done otherwise. It only enriched the already fantastic experience we had.

So what did we do? First day we went to The Olgas, or Kata Tjuta, as it is known by the Aboriginees. We were due to do the 'Valley of the Winds' tour but this was closed as it was 50 degrees celcius in the shade. Fair Dinkum! We learnt about the flora, fauna and landscape before zooming off to Ayers Rock to see the sunset. It was fascinating how the colour changed from red to ochre to brown - definitely a sight not to miss. We then went back to camp for some fantastic food a la Jerry (our tour guide) and then settled down to sleep under the stars. What a place to do it too!

After a short, starry night we were up at 4.30am (a lie-in apparently, compared to the other groups!) and went again to Ayers Rock for sunrise. I had been dicing with my conscience as to whether or not to climb Ayers Rock but the Gods took away the decision: it was closed due to high winds. Later it said it was closed due to the temperature... Ayers Rock can be closed due to could, temperature, wind, sun... you can see why though, if people will not take responsibility for themselves. So we did the 9km base walk and saw Aboriginal cave paintings and heard Aboriginal stories of snakes and sticks about how the markings were formed. It was hard to take in the scenery of such a dry, alien landscape.

After this we collected firewood and drove to our campsite near Kings Canyon, ready for our excursion the next day. After some marshmallows and singing round the campfire we watched shooting stars and then settled down again for another night under the stars.

The third day involved quite a steep ascent up Kings Canyon, walking through the garden of Eden. The scenery was very impressive and was perhaps the best part of the trip. The tour turned into our very own tour of 'Priscilla Queen of the Desert' locations, where we saw the place they climbed in the film and also saw the Casino they used in the film. How cool was that?

The group had got on so well we all decided to meet at a restaurant in the evening. This was aided for us by the fact that the tour guide, in recognition of all my help with the French, made me accept half the tips people had given him (including us!!). On top of this, the manager from the company came and thanked me personally and offered some help towards dinner at the restaurant. What else could I say but 'Merci beaucoup'!

So, we had a slap up meal of Kangaroo steak and camel pie along with a good chat and some good wine (recommended by the French - who else could we trust more?!) and then said some sad au revoirs. Dave tried to get by with a few 'bonnet de douche"'s but this didn't help too much.

The next day we bought the obligatory boomerang, complete with aboriginal art (which meant a lot more now we understand the symbols) at the airport and settled down ready for our flight. Next stop: Sydney.